If my grandfather knew how I scamped his funeral.

...he would turn over in his garage.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Moe’s Saloon in the Old West was seeing a lot of customers lately...

It was getting busier and busier by the day, so much so that there was barely a seat left in the whole joint. The hotshots were playing poker, the 49-ers were drinking and cat-calling the dames. The piano was playing, the whiskey was flowing, everyone was having the time of their lives. Suddenly, th...

Tommo was a canary. [long]

Tommo was a canary. Like his father, and his father before him, Tommo worked in the granite mines. Every morning, he would perch upon the shoulder of his favorite miner, and descend down, down into the deep.

Tommo had a lovely wife canary at home named Millet. Millet and Tommo had two sons...

So an elephant was taking a shower...

So an elephant was taking a shower and he happened to notice his roommate the ant walk by.
So the elephant calls out "Hey Ant, could you get me a towel?"
The ant stops, turns to the elephant and says "What do I look like, a refrigerator?"

I guess I missed my cakeday but I wanted to sha...

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