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Bully: I bet your dick is a size of a tic tac

The quiet kid: That's why your mom's breath smells so good

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A high school bully sees an old victim at their reunion,

Bully: Hey virgin!

Victim: Im not a virgin, just ask your sister.

Bully: I dont have a sister, dumbass.

Victim: Just wait nine months.

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What should you reply when a bully asks you ''Why are you so fat?''

''Everytime i fuck your mom she gives me a cookie.''

I got one of them anti bullying bracelets today

Nicked it off some fat ginger prick at the park

I've never understood the concept of bullying

Why are YOU mad that I'M ugly?

Years ago, I viciously beat up my high school bully with a baseball bat. Both of his arms were broken.

Come to think of it, that's probably why I felt brave enough to beat him up.

What is a bully’s favorite type of joke?

One with a punch line.

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My son got suspended for defending himself against a bully

So I went to the school to see why that happened...

“It’s against our policy to hit other students.” Says the principal.

“So you’re telling me that anyone in your school who feels threaten in a situation shouldn’t even fight back?” I say

“Yes”

So I did what any rational ...

My high school bully still takes my lunch money.

But on the upside, he makes great Subway sandwiches!

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Bully in HS

High School Principal calls for the father to come to school one morning and he doesn't quite understands what would be the reason...

Getting there, he starts complaining with the receptionist about why he was called to go there.

Dad: Lady, I don't know why the principal called me here...

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A schoolyard bully is picking on a nerd and says, "Hey, loser, see that guy over there? He told me your mother fucked a donkey, and you're the result!"

The nerd gets upset and says, "Ignore him! Hee-haw, hee-haw, hehaways says that."

I was bullying and kicking this pregnant lady for quite some time

It was soooo awkward when she birthed me lol

I didn’t attend the funeral of my high-school bully

But I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

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A bully called me pussy

I replied i am what I eat. You Dick

After years of getting yelled at and doing his work, i finally stood up to my bully...

He fired me.

Don't believe what your school bully tells you.

Always take it with a grain of assault.

A victim of bullying on death row

There was once a man who was bullied for looking sort of like a clown, with pale skin and a red nose. After years of being bullied by classmates and coworkers alike, he snaps and commits a homicide in the office he worked at.

For the murders of several people, he gets put on death row.
Aft...

I used to bully someone in a wheelchair.

He didn't stand up for himself.

"STOP HITTING YOURSELF, STOP HITTING YOURSELF" the bully chanted

But I could not, for he popped off my prosthetics

The only way to stop a bully is to stand up to them.

Trust me, I have bullied a *lot* of people.

I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands when they first came out.

I say bought, I actually stole it off a short, fat ginger kid.

Why can you bully orphans?

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

I've been bullying this kid

Good thing hes an orphan. Who's he gonna tell, his parents?

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A guy named John Hitler was tired of people bullying him for his name so he went to the federal court and changed it hoping the harassments would stop.

But Peter Hitler is still getting bullied to this day.

Why is it wrong to bully people in wheel chair?

Because they can't stand up for themselves.

What did the banana say to the banana bully?

You hurt my peelings

If online bullying has taught us anything.

It's that some kids would rather kill themselves than lose a bit of weight.

I finally plucked up enough courage to beat up the school bully.

It was a different school, and 15 years later,
but damn it felt good

An apple a day keeps the bully away

If you throw hard enough

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Today i saw a kid getting beaten up at school by 4 bullys so i decided to take a step

This fucker got no chance versus 5 of us

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A bully at school told me my clothes were gay

So a choked that asshole with my "Pale Heather Cashmere Scarf".

A woman on a farm is getting breakfast ready for her family.

As she works at the counter, she notices her son out in the yard bullying several of the animals. When he comes in for breakfast she sets a bowl if dry cereal and a glass of water in front of him.

"What gives mom?"

"Well son, I watched you picking on the animals, so I'm punishing you a...

My youngest kid and I like to bully the big one.

That's what we call my wife.

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A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down.

He bangs on the bar with his paw and demands a beer.
The bartender approaches and says, "We don't serve beer to bears in bars in Billings." The bear, becoming angry, demands again that he be served a beer. The bartender tells him again, more forcefully, "We don't serve beer to belligerent bears i...

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Bullying

\- I am here at the school because my daughter is being bullied.

\- Who is your daughter?

\- That chubby one that looks like a capybara, seating in the back of the class.

Bullying

As I was walking home from school, I saw a kid getting bullied by three other kids, so I decided to help. I knew he wouldn’t stand a chance against the four of us.

I ran into my high school bully yesterday

Unfortunately he was wearing his seatbelt

What do you call an average math bully?

Mean.

The bully loomed threateningly over the nerd and said, "You know what snitches get don't you?"

Ummm, "150 points?"

My son is starting school soon and thinks the other children will bully him because of his name...

I said, "Don't be silly, Someoneyourownsize, why would anyone pick on you?"

Why should you never bully a fifth grader gypsy?

Because his father is in the eleventh grade.

I met this little boy today who told me he is starting at a new school tomorrow and was afraid that the other kids would bully him.

I told him, "Don't be silly, Someoneyourownsize. Why would anyone pick on you?"

What do you get when you cross a lab monkey and a bully?

I don’t know, but it’s about to beat you up after Rhesus..

Disclaimer: Took this one from r/adviceanimals

What does a bully say to SpaceX?

Gimme your launch money!

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My friends and I get bullied a lot

I was at school, going to the lunchroom with my friends- James (he has Parkinson's Disease), Alex (he's mute), Megan (she's completely blind in both eyes), Abby (she has asthma) and Hayley (she's albino). I myself am paralyzed from the waist down and so I need to use a wheelchair. Since my friends a...

All these people are so quick to criticize Melania Trump for wanting to take on cyber bullying when that's something her husband has a problem with

But no one criticized Laura Bush for wanting to teach kids how to read

Everyone thinks Goliath was this big, tough, Jew-bully.

But really, he was a Gentile giant.

Govt. Statistics show that 35% of all school kids fall victim to online bullying and this can only mean 1 thing

65% of my emails aren't going out

Met my school bully 10 years after I last saw him. He still takes my money today.

But on the other hand, he certainly knows how to make a decent sandwich.

I was bullied...

When I was a little kid this other kid in a wheelchair used to bully me but I couldn't do anything about it because I felt bad making fun of him. So for the rest of my life people knew me as the guy who "couldn't stand up for himself" and I think that's ironic considering it all.

My ex-best friend used to be really nice to me, but ever since they found out I have flat feet, they've been mean to me and bullying me over it.

They're my arch-enemy now.

I told my bully he was just a child having an existential crisis.

He said “I know you are, but what am I?”

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A boy named Steve was being bullied by a boy named Billy.

Billy's parents were vegan, and one day Billy's father had a stroke out of nowhere, despite his healthy lifestyle.

Ever since Billy's dad was hospitalized after the stroke, Billy became very more and more aggressive to the point where he would bully Steve and hurl insults at him daily for no ...

All the kids are bullying little Johnny.

Poor little Johnny (some water over his head)!

When people start bullying me about my weight, I cut myself.....

another piece of cake

It wasn't when the bully called me a big fat doughboy that hurt as much as the punch in my stomach.

It left a big impression.

A girl from a strict family.

There was a girl from a very strict family. Her father absolutely hated fruits and no one in the family was allowed to eat them. As far as the girl knew her Uncle had died from choking on an apple which is why they were banned.

All through her school years she longed to taste any fruit, s...

Why does Earth bully other planets?

Because they have no life.

A bully and his gang walk into a Subway store

He then sees the sandwich artist (that's what they are called) is a skinny, young, inexperienced kid- a perfect target to bully while ordering some subs. He walks up to the kid and starts his order of his 6-inch sub

The kid then proceeds to cut a footlong sub bread in half for a 6-inch sub wh...

When I was younger a bully used to take my money...

He still does, but now he asks if I want fries with my order.

Did you hear about that masochistic bully?

He was just begging to get punched

What did the blonde say when the classroom bully stole her pencil?

I LITERALLY CAN’T EVEN WRITE NOW

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A Japanese transfer student named Kiyosuke wanted to lose his virginity before graduation

He transferred as a senior student, and high school graduation was near.

Because of his Asian physique, all the girls from school don't find him particularly attractive. Two months ago, one of his classmates, Sarah, found out that he is very fond of anime; so she spread malicious rumors about...

The bully problem.

The kid comes home crying to his mommy.

"Mommy, some bad kids in school keep saying my head is big!".

Mom answers "next time it happens, run after them and give them some good punches!!!"

Next day, kiddo comes crying again. "Mommy, some bad kids in school called me big headed ...

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