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Predictable Jokes

The Ketchup shortage this year was so predictable.

But I guess Heinz sight is 2020

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I was 13, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend with big tits.

When I was 16, I got a girlfriend with big tits, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with zest for life. In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I ...

Why is Windows software so predictable?

You can see right through it.

I just watched a movie about a y=x graph

The plot was a bit predictable


And a little flat


Good special f(x) though

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Rednecks have a pretty predictable stance on sex ed.

If you're a redneck with a son, it's go forth and multiply, it's your God-given right and duty!

If you're a redneck with a daughter, it's don't have sex, I'll make sure your suitor leaves with bullet holes.

If you're a redneck with both, you don't bother. They already know

Why are mexicans so predictable in Uno?

Because they always wish for the green card

Which piano player is the most predictable poker player?

Ben Folds

[OC I think] Sure, Matthew McConaughey jokes are pretty predictable...

But they're all right, alright? Alright.

An attorney arrived home late, after a very tough day trying to get a stay of execution.

His last minute plea for clemency to the Governor had failed and he was feeling worn out and depressed.

As soon as he walked through the door at home, his wife started on him about, "What time of night to be getting home is this? Where have you been? Dinner is cold and I'm not reheating it."...

A monk decides to take up the art of swordplay.

Taking some time off from the Buddhist monastery, he trains with his fencing teacher, learning all the positions, attacks and defenses, and generally becomes fairly proficient at the sport. His teacher encourages him to take up the competition circuit, as there is little left she can teach the monk....

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