we should stop making fun of the Americans for using inches, foot, miles, etc as units of measurements.

it's not like they crashed a rocket into Mars because of this or something... oh wait...

Why are there no cats on Mars?

Curiosity killed them all!

Is it too soon to joke about the mars rover?

There is way too many good puns for it to be a missed opportunity.

I’ve been seeing this girl from Mars

We’re in a interspacial relationship.

Will there be 4G coverage on Mars?

Sadly it'll only be 0.4g.

How do we know that the planet Mars has an active reddit account?

Because it has no life.

Why did the astronaut give up on going to Mars?

Because there's no longer any Opportunity there.

I feel that if we send people to Mars, we should dismantle the old rovers for their technology.

Otherwise we’ll miss a hell of an Opportunity.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

One day people will land on Mars. Search for the rover, dust him off and give it the treatment it deserves.

A robo bro blow job.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus

All the other genders are from Ur-Anus

Our realationship is like the mars rover

It was meant to last 90 days but here I am 14 years later

Scientists now think cats originated on Mars. NASA was set to retrieve a specimen confirming this,

...but curiosity killed it.

Nasa was experimenting with different animals in space.

Monkeys were an obvious choice, but they had no patience. Mice chewed all the cables, dogs were too stupid and chickens were always scared. It seemed the only animal that could cope with the intense stress of space travel was a chilled out alley cat.

After a few months of testing and training...

Just heard NASA shutdown operations to the Mars rover.

Wasted opportunity!

I want to pay respects to the Mars Rover that NASA lost contact with.

It's a missed Opportunity.

Did you know they tested the Mars rover against animal attacks?

They had to switch to dogs because Curiosity killed the cat.

On Mars, the rover begins a new day by opening its solar panel to charge up when there's sunlight...

But this time it hits something.

The scientists are puzzled. There was nothing there when it last went to sleep. Anxious, they use the last of its energy turning its camera around. It was an Earth feline.

Curiosity killed a cat

If we find a dead feline on mars

We won’t be sure but Curiosity may have killed the cat

How does NASA check if there is life on mars?

They go there and see if “local girls in your area dying to meet you” ad pops up.

Where are Muslims going to pray when they go to Mars?

Elon's Mosque

I thought making a pun about the mars rover would be appreciated

But since everyone is pressing F to pay respect it just means that it's a missed oppertunity

Elon Musk has a plan to design electronic grass for Mars

He’s calling it an E-Lawn.

Why did Elon Musk choose SpaceX to land on mars?

Because if he chose SpaceY he’d land on 14 year old boys.

What happens when Taoiseach Leo Varadkar orders a probe be sent to Mars?

They launch the Irish Rovers.

NASA officials were interviewing three prospective astronauts to sent to Mars on a dangerous one-way trip

Only one of the three would go, and that candidate would never return to Earth. The interviewer asked the first candidate, an engineer, how much he wanted to be paid to go.

"One million dollars," replied the engineer, "and I want it donated to my alma mater, Rice University."

The inter...

India sends a cat to Mars

In a few years India will send a cat to Mars to check out if it is possible to survive in that environment.

After some adaptation the cat starts roaming around on Mars.

All is well until one fine day suddenly the cat is mashed under a vehicle of sorts.

Everyone is wondering w...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

If Elon Musk made love to a woman while on his rocket to Mars...

Would that be SpaceX space sex?

An astronomer has realized an ancient society has been writing jokes all over Mars, Venus, and other celestial bodies...

The astronomer, getting a huge laugh out of them, decided to record them down. The astronomer kept looking into space, and he kept finding gems that he couldn't stop laughing at. One day, having recorded over 100 jokes, he decided to publish all of them in a book, because the jokes were so funny and...

They have found water on the mars...

Is Nestle already planning its own space program?

They found a cat on mars...

A live cat was found roaming the surface of Mars. Scientists planned to have the Mars Rover capture the animal to study it but unfortunately while attempting to capture the feline, Curiosity killed the cat.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Why did SpaceX go to Mars

Becuase SpaceY already went to Uranus

Scientists have discovered a planet populated entirely by robots.

They call it Mars.

Travel to Mars

After years of work and billions of dollars, we can send a single astronaut to Mars and back. Jimmy is chosen to go on the mission with zero possibility of communication until he returns 10 years later. With a huge celebration, the shuttle takes off and the wait begins. After 10 years, Jimmy returns...

Mars: I'm wet...

NASA: I'm coming!

Did you hear about the man with a stutter who went to the shop for a mars bar?

He came back with 50 packs of m and m's

What does Mars smell like?

Nothing really, but it does have a bit of an Elon Musk to it.

"We Do Not Have A Child Slave Colony On Mars."

They are free to leave the dome whenever they wish.

Yo momma is so fat ...

She took a jump in the pool, they found water on Mars.

My friend at NASA told me he was very satisfied to discover a lake on Mars.

He told me it was always a wet dream of his.

If Bruno Mars married Venus Williams on Earth, do you think they'd have a Sun?

Only if they planet.

Did you hear about the restaurant on mars?

The food was amazing, but the atmosphere wasn’t that great.

I only started space exploration this week and already I've colonized Venus and Mars

V:e:n:u:s:a:n:d:M:a:r:s

The latest report from Mars indicates the presence of large ring structures of precious stones and a dusting of glitter almost everywhere

Apparently, efforts are underway to tiara-form the planet.


(I do apologize for this. I happen to hear someone pronounce this word rather frequently and this is what I keep imagining they are meaning, along with some deposits of sass, pageantry and frills.)

Why isn't Bruno Mars named Bruno Snickers?

Because he doesn't have the nuts.

How do they organize a party on Mars?

They planet.

My five year old told me this today.

A Mars rover barged into my house. I knew it was Spirit

because Opportunity knocks.

Scientists are baffled by cat remains on Mars..

You can guess who killed them.

Mars and NASA

Mars: Come over

NASA: You're 33.9 million miles away

Mars: I'm wet

NASA: I'm coming over

Budweiser starts a collaboration with SpaceX to be the first beer on Mars

I can already see the headlines...
"Colonist discovers water on Mars!"

What do you call it when you get your Mars rover stuck in a crater?

A fourth world problem.

They’ve written a sequel to The Martian where a hundred rescuers attempt to rescue a stranded man on mars, only to fail.

It’s title.

101 Dull Martians

Mars magnetic field is increasing for the first time in millions of years

For a total of one Tesla!

A rich man was strolling along a riverside with his 6 year old daughter and they came to a bridge...

On the bridge there was a hobo sitting and shaking his cup. As they were walking past, the rich man wasn't keeping an eye on his daughter, who was playing with the bars of the railing and she slipped through and fell in. Not knowing how to swim himself, the man shouted for help. Without saying a wor...

I really hope someone brings their cat to Mars only to get it get run over

So we can finally say Curiosity killed the cat.

I'm such a bad golfer, they should send me to Mars.

I'm guaranteed to find water.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A married couple goes to Mars

A Martian couple and an Earthling couple have met and are talking about all sorts of things.

Finally, the subject of sex comes up.

"Just how do you guys do it?" asked the Earthling.

"Pretty much the way you do," responded the Martian.

Discussion ensues and finally the...

I told Elon Musk a joke about mars...

he said it was terable.

The US Government will be very supportive of NASA's efforts to put humans on Mars.

The only thing NASA has to do is declare war on Mars!

News has just come in that The Mars Rover has discovered a member of the feline species while exploring.

Unfortunately, Curiosity killed the cat.

By launching a Tesla to Mars Space X has accomplished the primary goal of the Boring Company.

Avoiding LA traffic!

People say Mars is neutral waters

but last time I checked it was a *red state*

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

NASA Scientists say its possible to live on Mars.

Bullshit, I tried it and now I'm 15Kg heavier and diabetic

So aliens from Mars comes down to Earth...

...And they're friendly! The leaders of the world and the aliens plan a huge televised event where the leaders can ask questions on whatever they want.

During this event, the pope is up to talk to the aliens.

"I know this question may sound odd to you gentlemen," the pope starts to ask...

Earth, Venus, Mars, and Jupiter were going to setup a party

But they failed because nobody knew how to planet

There's a new restaurant on Mars

The food is really good but the atmosphere is awful.

NASA should tell the US government they found oil on Mars

And then watch the funding skyrocket

How far is Mars from Earth?

A few CVS receipts away

If Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus was written today...

The solar system would need more planets for the title.

The year 2050: "Hey honey, want to go to mars today?"

Nah, I don't like the atmosphere.

We've sent multiple rovers too mars but mars hasn't sent any back.

It's about time we play red rover with another planet

I heard they found water on Mars...

I bet California is pretty jealous.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Men are from Mars. A Joke for the long Monday ahead.

http://austin.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/60286784.html source

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so

much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have

never figured out why men think with their head and women with ...

Why is it not a good idea to send cats to Mars?

Because Curiosity would kill them!

Yo momma's privates are like Mars...

It took a team of scientists decades to find moisture on it.

NASA says they've found organic material on Mars...

...but they're probably just putting 'organic ' on the label so they can mark up the prices by 200%

BREAKING NEWS: NASA announces Mars Rover discovered new feline-like life form on the Red Planet

Unfortunately, it ran over the newly discovered creature. Yes, it seems Curiosity killed the cat.

NASA is planning another rover for Mars in 2020

They should call it Hindsight

Two American astronauts are launched to Mars.

Two American astronauts are launched to Mars. When they reach the Martian surface they see a beautiful red-skinned, red-haired woman. Using their language-translation machine, they tell her they are from Earth. They see she is stirring a big pot, and every now and then she pulls a newborn baby from ...

They say we know more about the surface of Mars than we do about the bottom of the ocean

which is still twice as much as I know about the second page of a Google Search

The drone on Mars ran over a feline organism.

That's right - Curiosity killed the cat