UPJOKE
independentpunkreggaealbumrockerstechnoelectronicagenresynthpopmusichardcorebandsdjsskarockabilly

What’s an indie film lovers favourite time of day?

8:24

What's your favorite indie film?

Mine is The Last Crusade

Told my friend that the wife and I have just come back from a trip in the West Indies.

He said "Jamaica"? I said "Nah, she went of her own accord"

I told my friend that my girlfriend went on holiday to the west indies.

He said "Jamaica"...

I said, "No, she went of her own accord." I then added, "For her next holiday, she's off to one of the coldest states in America."

He said "which one"

I said "Alaska".

He said, "don't bother. I'll ask her, myself."

I was talking to a friend when he said 'My wife's just gone to the West Indies' I asked 'Jamaica?'

'No, she went of her own accord' he replied

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I working on an indie film about premature ejaculation

It's coming soon

Why do indie kids suck at karate?

They never got past the white belt.

West Indies

Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.

I love indie movies

Me too, the best one is the first one with the snakes

How many indie bands does it take to change a light bulb?

Eh, it's some number you've probably never heard of.

My newspaper had a story about a sovereign citizen “going commando” in public.

They got charged for indie-cent exposure.

Why did the hipster's stomach hurt?

He had indie-gestion.

Most Hipsters’ favourite movie is Raiders of the Lost Ark.

It’s the first indie film.

Why do hipsters love Harrison Ford?

Because he's Indie!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] Why do hipsters like anal sex?

Because it's indie ass!

What's the earliest joke you can remember? Here's mine:

These two:

"My wife went to the West Indies"
"Jamaica?"
"No, she went of her own accord."

"My wife went to the East Indies"
"Jakarta?"
"No, she went by plane."

A hobbyist metalsmith was arrested for displaying his handmade pennies in public. What was he charged with?

Indie-cent exposure.

If you made a wall hanging out of cheap necklaces bought from the merch tables at small, underground rock concerts...

Would you have a Decoration of Indie Pendants?

Joke in real life

DISCLAIMER: THIS JOKE SUCKS BUT IT HAPPENED TO ME EARLIER TODAY

I'm currently in hospital being treated for a pulmonary embolism and the doctor ordered a echocardiogram for me.

When I was getting my heart looked at, it was the only place I've been in hospital playing music. Really coo...

Struggle is

Watching a match between England and West Indies, on a black and white television. Turn the brightness up and one team disappears, turn it down and the other does.

What's the difference between CNN and Al-Jazeera?

CNN shows the missiles taking off and Al-Jazeera shows them landing.

(Not mine, just heard it on the Jimmy Dore show)

also

"My favorite indie band is palestinian. I think they're really going to blow up."

A Short History Lesson

The old missionaries who arrived in the West Indies were the cannibals first taste of Christianity

An Irishman marooned on a desert island frees a genie

A Scotsman, an Englishman, and Irishman (Paddy, of course) survived a plane crash, and were washed ashore on a desert island.

They were there for years, and became quite emaciated, with the lack of food.

One day a bottle washes up on the shore. They all look at it, and Paddy rubs it to...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A struggling rock band...

A struggling indies band from Brooklyn, The Spoonerists, was in the process of recording their debut album. The artistic sentiment of the group led them to use ambient sounds from nature in their arrangements. One of the members of the band took it upon himself to go out in to the field and make rec...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.