UPJOKE
united kingdomprioncanadacattlesheepantibodykuruunited statesslaughterhousedairy cowspet foodalbertacervidstexasalpha helical

Mad Cow Jokes

Mad Cow Disease

One cow asked another, "Have you heard of this mad cow disease? The news sounds so scary".

The other cow replied, "Doesn't bother me, man. I'm a helicopter".

Two cows on a hill. One cow ask the other, have you herd of the mad cow disease?

The other cow says, yeah, but why do I care? I’m a helicopter!

What do you get when you cross a mad cow and and angry sheep?

A baaaaaaaad mooooooood

2 Cows in a feild.. one says "what do you think of that mad cow disease?"

The other replies "I dunno, it doesn't effect me, I'm a duck"

Mad cows…

…are just in a bad mooed.

ze mad cow disease

On a land full of grass, two cows were walking together.

Cow 1: Have you heard of the mad cow disease going around?

Cow 2: Yes, I'm so happy I'm a penguin.

Mad cows

Two cows are standing in a field on a sunny day. The grass sways in waves from the summer breeze; a bumblebee slowly meanders across the meadow. One cow turns to the other.
Cow one: you know, I’m really struggling. I simply can’t shake this anxiety.
Cow two: (looking at his companion with a l...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mad Cow Disease

A Sexy Female TV reporter, with Big boobs, interviews a farmer, seeking the cause of Mad Cow disease.


Lady: Sir, we are here to get info on what causes Mad Cow Disease. Do you have any idea?


The farmer said, "Do you know that a Bull screws a Cow only once a year?"

...

Mad cow disease

Two cows were talking over the fence bordering their farms.

The first cow said "Have you heard about this mad cow disease, it's spreading really fast."

The second cow responded "What do I care? I'm a helicopter."

JUST Jokes::MAD COW CONCERN::

A husband and wife go to a restaurant. The waiter approaches the table to take their order.

"I'll have your biggest, juiciest steak," says the husband.

"But sir, what about the mad cow?" asks the waiter.

"Oh," says the husband, "she'll order for herself."

When Mad cow disease was going around, noone knew what to do.

It was utter madness.

What about the mad cow?

A man and his wife arrive from a business trip and
go to his favorite steakhouse unaware of the mad cow outbreak in his town. The waiter sits them and says, "Our special today is duck or shrimp."

The man replies, "I want a T-bone steak medium well."

The waiter, a bit miffed continue...

Why can't men get mad cow disease?

Because all men are pigs.

Did you hear about the mad cow disease outbreak?

It was udder pandemonium

Did you hear about that mad cow disease?

A cow to another: "Did you hear about that mad cow disease? Makes cows go completely insane!" The other cow: "Good thing I'm a helicopter!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mad Cow Disease

Q: Why do cows get the mad cow disease?
A: Anyone would go mad if someone squeezes your tits four times a day, but only let you have sex once an year!

What's the difference between mad cow disease and PMS?

Nothing.

Two Jersey cows are in a field under a tree. The 1st cow says to the 2nd “Hey George have you heard about mad cow disease? They say it makes us cows go crazy and then they fall over dead!"

George replies "Well it's a damn good thing I‘m a helicopter!”

This mad cow thought he was a wolf, wanted some steak, and started chewing on his old friends

It was cow-nibble-ism

Mad Cow Disease

There are two cows out in the pasture, watching as the farmer takes a prize bull behind the barn to shoot it.
The first cow looks at the second one and says "Can't believe Joe came down with mad cow disease. Are you scared we might get it too?"
The second cow looks at the first cow with a puzz...

Bill and Hillary Clinton are eating dinner in a town where there has been a recent outbreak of Mad Cow disease.

When the waiter comes to take their order, Bill asks for a steak.

“But sir, what about the Mad Cow?” the waiter asks, concerned.

“Don’t worry,” Bill replies, “she’ll order for herself.”

On another peaceful hill, stand two cows, the first cows turns chewing her cud to the second cow and says, " I say, does this mad cow malarkey worry you at all". The second cow turns to the first, swallows his cud and says...

"Nah, it don't worry us tractors"

I went out to eat and told the waiter I wanted the steak bloody rare. He asked if I was worried about the mad cow, to which I replied.....

..... No. My wife will cheer up after you take her order.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man and a woman were fast asleep in bed

Suddenly, at 4 o'clock in the morning, a resounding noise came from outside.

The woman, sort of bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man,

"Oh No! That must be my husband!"

The man quickly got out of bed, panicked and naked. He jumped out the window like a crazy...

Two cows are grazing on the meadow. One of them seems worried.

When the other one asks what's it about, the 1st cow asks : "Aren't you worried, with these stories about mad cow disease being back etc ?"

The second cow laughs and replies "Lol why would I care ? I'm a rabbit!"

Two cows are grazing together.

The first looks over to the second and asks, “Did you hear about the recent outbreak of Mad Cow disease?”


The second continues his grazing, unconcerned. “Why should I care? I’m a helicopter!”

A Texan, A Russian and a New Yorker.

A Texan, a Russian and a New Yorker go to a restaurant in London.
The waiter tells them, "Excuse me -- if you were going to order the steak, I'm afraid there's a shortage due to the mad cow disease."
The Texan says, "What's a shortage?"
The Russian says, "What's a steak?"
The New Yorker ...

Scientist recently linked a disease to women acting like a Karen.

It's mad cow disease.

I took my wife to a restaurant

The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.
"I'll have the rump steak, rare, please."
He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"
"Nah, she can order for herself."
And that's when the fight started.....

Two cows are out grazing in a pasture.

One turns to the other and says, "Have you heard about this mad cow disease that's going around? Its pretty scary stuff."

The other cow nods and chews its cud thoughtfully. "I suppose it is pretty scary, but it doesn't affect us ducks."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

That's how the fight got started...

My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.

I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have Sex?'

'No,' she answered.

I then said, 'Is that your final answer?'

... She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes..'

So I ...

Two cows are standing in a field in Canada in the year 2003.

One cow turns to the other and says, "we gotta watch out. I hear mad cow disease has been spreading through the herd." The other cow looks towards him and says, "what are telling me for? I'm not a cow, I'm a duck!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man and a woman go out to dinner...

This is during the time the Mad Cow disease ravished Britain. A man and a woman are sitting at a table when the waiter approaches them, asking "what would you like for dinner?"

The man replies, I'll have a fat juicy steak, medium rare with all the trimmings. Gravy and roast potatoes please. T...

Why do they call it PMS?

Because the name "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.



My buddy told me this back in 2002 and I've never forgotten this one.

Two cow talking in a field

The first one ask :
"aren't you afraid about this terrible disease from the neighbor's farm called" mad cow" ? "

The second one looked at her, surprised, and answered :
" I don't care... I'm a rabbit"

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.