if school was a game, there would be loading screen tips reminding you to
stay behind cover and only move when the enemy is reloading
An old farmer got up in the middle of the night to use the toilet.
As he was heading back to bed, he looked out the window and saw the lights on in his shed. A closer inspection revealed men loading his tools and farm machinery into their truck.
He rushes to the phone and calls 000 (911)
"I need the police! There are some guys clearing out my shed!"...
Two Irish hunters from Belfast hired a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose.
They bagged six. As they started loading the plane for the return trip home, the pilot tells them the plane can take only three moose.
The two Irishmen objected strongly, stating; "Last year we shot six moose and the pilot let us put them all on board and he had the same plane as yours." <...
A clergyman was walking and saw a farmer loading hay and struggling with the work.
"you look tired son,take a rest" he said. No,my father would hate that" he replied "Don't be silly, everyone needs a break sometimes. Come take some cold water" the clergyman replies. Again the farmer declined. This continues for about two minutes, until the clergyman says "your father must...
What did Noah say when he finished loading all the animals?
"Now I've herd everything."
Gun loading announcement...
Apparently my local radio station had an announcement on how to load a gun.
But I never got the bulletin.
A Mexican dock worker is loading a ship...
A Mexican dock worker is loading a boat with a shipment of French cuisine, when his boss happens to walk by. The boss asks, "hey, what's that you're loading over there?"
The dock worker replies, "Es cargo."
Just an Internet Explorer joke
I keep loading paper into my printer but it keeps saying "I just can't get enough"
I think it's stuck in Depeche Mode.