A grill master wanted to load up the grill with more BBQ, but he was running low on hot coals ...

So, he decided not to brisket.

I treat everyday like I'm running a marathon tomorrow...

I load up carbs, rest and don't run.

Two Newfoundlanders Travel to Toronto

Two Newfoundlanders, Jimmy and Dave, are out of work, so they decide to move to Toronto to find jobs. They scrounge up every last cent they have for the trip and find they have $1000 between them to get started.

As soon as they get to Toronto, they see a sign in a shop window that says "Suits...

Dave walks into a bar

He is served a pint of lager.
"1 penny please" said the barman
"1 penny? a pint of lager is just 1 penny? said Dave
"That's right, all beers are just a penny today" said the barman.
after he had about 5 pints, he asks for a bottle of wine
"That's also a penny a bottle, in fact you can...

A pastors wife goes to the fish market

She’s looking to make fillets for dinner and asks the guy behind the counter for a suggestion.

“I’d recommend this right here, ma’am. It’s new to the market.”

“What kind of fish is it?” She asks.

“It’s dam fish, ma’am.”

The pastors wife abruptly says. “How dare you use th...

A devout Christian man living in New Orleans refuses to leave his home after hearing news of an imminent hurricane and flood.

A richly devout Christian man lives alone in New Orleans. He keeps to himself mostly, isolating himself in prayer and self-reflection with little care for the outside world.


One day, the man notices it growing dark outside earlier than normal. He steps outside and feels the wind has pick...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A German truck driver is sitting in a Liverpool bar mouthing off about how lazy the British are.

He says 'I drive my truck from Hamburg to Liverpool via Holland/Belgium over to the UK and up to Liverpool, drops his load off and back to Hamburg in under 2 days."

A drunk old scouse man can't help but hear him and mutters 'Fuck off lad, I used to pick my load up in Liverpool, drop it off in...

2 brothers and a newfie are going ice fishing.

After they load up the truck, the two brothers hop in the front, and the newfie jumps into the back bed of the truck. As they are driving across the ice, the truck breaks through and begins to sink. The first brother opens his door and swims to the surface. As he starts taking his clothes off, the o...

A pair of newlyweds go golfing...

A pair of young newlyweds decide to go golfing at an upscale resort. They get up early Sunday morning, load up their clubs, and drive the hour and half to the remote location. On the first tee, they are astounded to see multi-million dollar homes lining the course, the rising sun catching stained pl...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A lonely old farmer...

An old farmer had been single for awhile and finally decided that had been alone too long and ordered a mail order bride. A month passes and finally he goes and picks her up from the train station with his mule and wagon. They load up on the wagon and the mule doesn't budge. The farmer took a minute...

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