Di‌‌d yo‌‌u kno‌‌w i‌‌f yo‌‌u hol‌‌d you‌‌r ea‌‌r u‌‌p to‌‌o ‌‌a stranger‌‌s leg

... yo‌‌u ca‌‌n actuall‌‌y hea‌‌r the‌‌m sa‌‌y "wha‌‌t th‌‌e fuc‌‌k ar‌‌e yo‌‌u doing?"

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Army man dont want deploy

So army man sees dress woman and ask to go under dress

Army pass by and ask her where army man is

She say she dont kno

Army man says sorry for being under her dress but says she has nice leg

Lady said look up further and you find nice dick

Man was confused

L...

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2 dogs are in a bar

Dog 1: "I heard a great joke today"

Dog 2: "Let's hear it then"

Dog 1: "Knock kno..."

Dog 2: goes fucking mental

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[Long] a blind joke.

One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated waiting for the pilot to show up so they can get under way. The pilot and co-pilot finally appear in the rear of the plane and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind; the pilot is...

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke smoke marijuana

Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said “u kno u wna”
Jill said yes, lifted her dress and had a little fun
But the stupid fucker forgot his rubber and now they have a son.

TIL "saltpeter" is a casual term for potassium nitrate.

The more you KNO...

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Cleetus had a embarrassing disease

So he went to the doctor:

" Sho doc, I have this scratchy in me parts and I was thinking you may have some midicin to you know get thi old junk back on health"

The doctor examined him and diagnosed with an STD, he gave him some suppositories

" Alright Mr thoothill, this supposi...

Two friends join the SAS.

Two friends, Pat and Mick, are trying to join the SAS. After doing all the training their commanding officer in charge tells them, "Now you two must realise that you have to do anything your commanding officer says no question asked, so Mick go into that room there", so Mick walks in. The officer th...

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Parrots..

A parrot swallows a viagra tab. His owner,disgusted,puts him in the freezer to cool off. After 20 minutes, he opens the freezer to see the parrot sweatin."why r u sweating?", he asks. The Parrot replies,"Do u kno how fucking hard it is to open the legs of a frozen chicken!?"

Knock knock

"Hey Walter, wanna hear a joke?"
"Sure"
"Knock kno- "

"I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS!!!"

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