UPJOKE

Knock Knock Jokes

Knock knock

Who's there?

Mary.

Mary who?

Mary Christmas!

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Anna.

Anna who?

Anna happy new year!

Merry Christmas and a happy new year, Reddit :)

Daughter made up a cute knock knock joke:

Knock knock
Who’s there?
Let’s eat…
Let’s eat who?

What are you a cannibal?

Best knock knock joke ever..

Three brothers age 92, 94 and 96 live in a house together.

One night the 96 year old draws a bath, puts his foot in and pauses. He yells down the stairs, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?"

The 94 year old yells back, "I don't know, I'll come up and see." He starts up the stairs and...

Whoever invented the knock knock jokes

Should get a Nobell prize.

Soooo my 4 year old nephew just told me this. He's a little nerd but it made me chuckle. Knock knock...

Who's there?

Cows go.

Cows go who?

No idiot... Cows go moo!

Knock Knock

Knock Knock

Who's There?

Ya.

Ya Who?

Hold your excitement and just let me in.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I need a good Knock Knock joke.

A profile on a dating profile had the prompt "I'm funnier than you," so my opener was "Knock Knock." And now I'm fucked cause I don't actually know any decent ones other than the Randy Feltface one, which doesn't work with text.

Edit: Picked one. Let's see how it goes. I did not pick any of t...

Knock knock...

Who’s there?

Hike.

Hike who?


Warm midnight falling.
Stars shining, dancing brightly.
Peaceful all at once

My 5 year olds painful twist on a knock knock joke

I was telling my son the "knock knock who's there banana joke", and he laughed and told me to tell it to him again. As I said knock knock he then backhanded my face and said "you shouldn't stand so close to the door"

Let me tell you my favorite knock knock joke!

You start

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My grandma used to tell us this joke. She’d say, “knock knock,” we’d say, “who’s there?”

Then she’d say “I can’t remember!” and start to cry. And we’d laugh and laugh to make her feel better, but she was shit at telling jokes.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

9/11.

9/11 who?

You said you’d never forget!

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Dave." "Dave who?"

Dave begins to sob uncontrollably as he realises his mother's dementia has worsened.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Knock knock. Who's there? Grandad.

Shit stop the funeral!

Knock knock

Knock knock

Who's there?

Ah.

Ah who?

... Werewolves of London!

Courtesy of my 8-year-old : Knock knock

Who's there

Europe

Europe who?

No, you're a poo!

Knock knock.....

"Who's there?"

"Little old lady"

"Little old lady Who?"

>!"Stop yodelling and open the door" !<

Knock Knock

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Door mom.

Door mom who?

Door mom who, I've come to bargain!

*knock knock* "Who's there?" "Dejav."

"Dejav who?"

*knock knock*


*edit : thanks a lot for appreciating the stupidity

Knock Knock

[PERSON] who's there

Colin

[PERSON] Colin who?

Colonization, just kidding, colonizers don't knock before coming in

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Knock Knock

A little boy who answers the door to a traveling salesman. The boy is wearing a smoking jacket and holding a glass of brandy in one hand and a fat cigar in the other. “Hello, son, are your parents in?” asks the salesman. “What the fuck do you think?” the boy replies jadedly.

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Cargo!

Cargo who?

Car go beep beep.

Knock knock

Who’s there?
Amos.
Amos who?
A mosquito.

Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Ana.
Ana who?
Another mosquito.

My dad died last year. These were the only two jokes he knew.

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Bacon.

Bacon Who?

Bacon a cake for your cake day!

It’s my...

A surprisingly good/funny knock knock joke I wrote yesterday.

Knock knock

Who's there?

Beware, the owl people are infiltrating our town!

Beware, the owl people are infiltrating our town, Whooo

Oh no im too late!

Knock knock.

Who’s there?
Dracula.
Dracula who?
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Frankenstein.
Frankenstein who?
Knock.
Who’s there?
The Knock Less Monster.

Knock knock

Who's there?
Iowa
Iowa who?
I owe a big apology to you for this joke

Knock knock

Who’s there?

Steven Seagal.

Steven Seagal who?

Oh well, that’s show biz…

Knock Knock!

- Who's there?


- Doorbell repair guy.

Knock Knock?

“Who’s there?”

“Woo.”

“Woo who?”

“Don’t get too excited.”

Knock knock...

"Who's there?"

"Broken pencil"

"Broken pencil, who?"

"Never mind, it's pointless"

Joke Request: Any Kid Friendly Pony Themed Knock Knock Jokes?

Hey r/Jokes,



My 2 year old daughter recently learned about knock knock jokes and she LOVES them! However, she keeps adamantly asking for a good knock knock joke about ponies, but I can't find any anywhere. Can anyone help me find a good kid friendly knock knock joke about ponies? I...

Knock Knock

Who's there?

David.

David who?

It was at that moment David realised how serious his mothers Dementia was.

Why are there no knock knock jokes about America?

Cause' freedom rings

Knock Knock...

Knock Knock...

Who's there?

Ze KGB!

Ze KGB who?

Vee veel ask ze questions, da?

Why doesn’t the Grinch like knock knock jokes?

Because there's always Whos there!

*Knock knock* (courtesy of a 9 year old)

Who's there?

I eat map.

I eat map who?

*Queue a disgusted face on my cousin* **YOU EAT YOUR POO!**

Knock knock. Who's there? Control freak.

Right as they start to say "control freak who?" You quickly cut them off and say "next you're supposed to say control freak who!"

I tried to tell a homeless person a knock knock joke...

Punch line unnecessary.

Knock knock

Who's there?

Armin

Me too! Get the hell off my property!

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Hawaii…

Hawaii who?

Why I’m fine thanks, and how are you?

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Little Boy Blue

Little Boy Blue who?

Michael Jackson

Knock knock...

\-Who's there?

\-Europe

\-Europe who?

\-No, you're a poo!

Jenny has no arms and legs. Knock knock. Who's there?

Not Jenny

Give me your best kids knock-knock jokes!

My 4 year old is a budding comedian, and her new favourite is knock-knock jokes. She keeps asking me for new ones that she can tell to people, but I can't find many good ones that she will understand.

The current go-to's are:

Knock knock -- Who's there? -- Europe! -- Europe who? -- No,...

(Got to say this out loud) Knock knock...

- Who's there?

- I eat map

- I eat map who?

- Ewwww (etc, etc)


This is posted on behalf of our seven year old. It's his favourite joke.

Knock knock joke

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Unreliable Narrator.

Unreliable Narrator who?

That’s not what I said.

Knock knock…

Knock knock.

Who's there?

r/news.

r/news who?

[deleted]

Knock knock. “Who’s there”. “Jimmy”. “Jimmy Who”

said Jimmy’s grandmother, whose crippling Alzheimer’s has robbed her of all her memories.

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Kanga…

Kanga Who?

Actually, it’s kangaroo!

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Lettuce.

Lettuce who?

Lettuce pause this joke for a word from our sponsor, Raid Shadow Legends

Knock knock

Context my son was not in the mood for knock knock jokes

Me: Knock knock

Me: Knock knock

Me: Knock knock

Him: oh good they left

knock knock

My grandmother used to tell us a joke. She’d say “Knock knock”, we’d say “Who’s there?”. Then she’d say “I can’t remember”… and start to cry.

Knock knock.....

*hmm...that's a nice ripe watermelon*

Knock knock

Who’s there?

Wendy…

Wendy who?

Wendy moon hits your eyes like a big pizza pie

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Ivan!

Ivan who?

I'van trying to reach you about your cars extended warranty.

Voldemort: Knock Knock

James: Who’s there?

Voldemort: You Know

James: You Know who?

Voldemort: Exactly.

James: Aw, Dang!

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Dave.

Dave who?

Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

Knock knock.

*Knock knock*
Who's there?
Atch.
Atch who?
Bless you.


(I thought of this all on my own...but others may have also thought the same thing)

*knock knock"

Who's there?
Nick.
Nick who?


Nick started crying, realizing that his grandmother dementia has gotten a lot worse

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