"Why doesn't KFC have toilet paper?"

"It's finger lickin' good"

Why did the chicken went to KFC?

To see a chicken strip.

What do your girlfriend and KFC have in common?

Once you’re done with the thighs and the breast, all you have is a greasy box to put your bone.

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What do you call a prostitute behind a KFC?

A $5 Fill-up

Is KFC Twitter account

Veryfried?

What’s the difference between an artist and a KFC chicken bucket?

A KFC chicken bucket can feed a family of 4

The KFC near my house is haunted.

They think it's poultrygeist.

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Why are women like KFC?

After you’ve finished with the thigh and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.

What does kfc use to make its popcorn chicken?

Chicken colonels.

KFC

A man goes to see the pope.

"Your Holiness. I work for KFC, and we'll offer you ten million dollars to change the reading of the Lord's Prayer from 'Give us this day our daily bread' to ' Give us this day our daily chicken.'"

The pope is aghast! "I can't just go changing God's word f...

KFC but it could happen at Burger King too!

I went to the KFC to get the kids something to eat. They wanted the kid's meal with a leg so I said "kids meal with the leg" and the lady said, "Which side?" Me - \*Complete silence as I heavily contemplate such an odd question\* "I guess the right side, I don't know what the difference is." After s...

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I know I masturbate loudly, but that’s just the person I am.

And if you don’t like it, go find another KFC.

Why did the pastor go to KFC?

To grab some breast.

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Isn't it weird that KFC is one letter away from fuck?

New slogan: KFC, all that's missing is U

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An attractive woman once asked if I was more interested in breasts or legs. I told her that I was mainly into feet and anal.

I'm no longer welcome at that KFC restaurant.

All the witches be going to KFC tonight

They love some coven-ready chicken.

What does Tumblr and KFC's chicken have in common?

They both contain high amounts of trans fats.

Why does Trump like KFC better than Popeye's Chicken?

Less to read

Me and my pet Chicken walked into KFC

They thought I was giving it to them but instead I ordered a bucket for two

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High School Bully

The guy who picked on me all through high school and then became a millionaire just placed a delivery order at KFC.

Now I get the last laugh. I gave him original recipe and he ordered extra crispy. Checkmate Justin, you fucking loser

The head of KFC called the Pope

He said, "I'll give you a million dollars to change the Lord's prayer to give us our daily chicken."

The Pope said no and hung up.

KFC called back and offered 10 million.

The Pope said no and hung up.

KFC called back and offered 100 million.

The Pope said, "You hav...

I was in KFC with my bro when the lights went out...

I told him that the circuits were fried

KFC

A man from KFC arranges to visit the Pope. After receiving the papal blessing he whispers, "Your Holiness, we have a deal for you. If you change The Lord's Prayer from 'give us this day our daily bread' to 'give us this day our daily chicken' then we will donate $500 million dollars to the Church."...

Not enjoying your corn at KFC?

Blame the kernel.

What's the difference between KFC and /R/Jokes?

What you get served at KFC is original.

The Pope and Colonel Sanders of KFC are having a conversation about the change to the Lord's Prayer.

"Your Holiness," Sanders began. "You must make another change. Instead of give us today our daily bread, make it give us today our daily chicken."

"I cannot change these words!" The Pope was astounded. "They are ingrained in our very heritage!"

They negotiated until the Colonel finaly ...

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I like my amputees like a good meal at KFC

Must have at least two breasts and a leg.

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I heard KFC is sponsoring the cock fighting little league.

Can’t wait to see those chick contenders.

I was surprised when a friend said he'll work at KFC right after graduation..

Out of curiosity, I asked him why.



All he said was, "It's on my bucket list."

The leg piece and breast piece got into an argument at a kfc

The breast piece said let's fight it out to see which one is better.

The leg piece said,
Nah man, its been a long day and I'm battered.

A chicken had a job interview at a KFC today.

It got employed immediately for the rest of its life.

What kind of ghost haunts a KFC?

A Poultrygeist

Your mother is so unbelievably poor

That when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people’s fingers

What's the difference between a Philosophy major and a cashier at KFC?

A job application.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

The answer is not quite clear but it did affect the geopolitical structure and landscape of western civilization by becoming prey for KFC.

An old lady in London...(a true story)

Around a week ago I was waiting in queue behind an old lady at KFC. She placed her order, paid in cash, and all was well until she received one of those new plastic £5 notes as change from the cashier.

She vocally expressed her dislike about the presence of animal products in the new £5 bills...

What do KFC customers and Hannibal Lecter have in common?

Both love fingers

Why do bulimic girls love KFC?

Cause it comes with the bucket

I used to make some real zingers a long time ago.

But then KFC fired me because I made a whopper.

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Whenever I am asked if I am a breast or thigh guy, I always tell them I am mostly in to anal...

Which always ends in me being asked to leave the KFC!

KFC Calls Pope

After watching sales falling off for three straight months at Kentucky Fried Chicken, the Colonel calls up the Pope and asks for a favor.

The Pope says, "What can I do?"

The Colonel says, "I need you to change the daily prayer from,

'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'Give us...

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get away from KFC.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The other day a girl asked me if I like breasts or thighs. I told her I prefer bubble butts and a trimmed pussy with thin lips...

So I got kicked out of KFC.

KFC is a shelter

for battered chickens

Over half of UK KFC stores have closed down after switching chicken suppliers.

It was an original recipe for disaster.

I fetched a pail of water and ate a whole KFC family meal to myself...

So that's two things I can cross off my bucket list.

KFC seeks divine intervention.

When I tell this joke, I change it to Colonel Sanders making the pitch and mimic his unique voice.

KFC Pope

A salesman from KFC walked up to the Pope and offers him a million dollars if he would change "The Lord's Prayer" from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's got 8 legs and sounds like a vacuum sucking up honey?

Greedy bastard at KFC.

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Have You Heard About the new KFC Hilary Clinton Special.

its 2 small breasts, 2 large thighs and 2 left wings

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Thighs or breasts? NSFW

I was asked if I was a thighs or a breast man but I was neither, so I said I’m more a shaved pussy guy. Now I’m banned from KFC

My wife accidentally ordered way too many chicken strips for lunch

She was quite upset about, as she hates wasting food. My daughter I were quite happy to have some tasty junk food for dinner though. I said to my wife "We could do this again, I don't mind eating KFC. I hope this wasn't just a strip tease!"

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So this guy asks if I prefer breasts or legs

And I reply, really I'd prefer wet pussy.

Apparently this is not an appropriate thing to say at KFC.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

NSFW She asked...

If I preferred thighs or breasts?

Turns out shaven and anal was the wrong answer at KFC.

Did yo hear about the Hillary special at KFC?

Two fat thighs and a left wing for $2.99

Why does KFC only sell christian chicken?

Because the muslim ones are on the no-fry list.

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Ladder to success

A guy is wandering through the woods on a trail he's been through many times before when he notices a ladder in the middle of the trail stretching up farther than he can see.

He's never seen this before so he says to himself "fuck it lets see where this goes"

He begins his acsent climb...

Why did the rooster cross the road?

He heard there were some pretty hot chicks at KFC.

An IT consultant is fixing KFC's website.

While editing the code, he noticed a line that simply said, "KFC RULES" with improper syntax, which caused the site to crash. When he asked who wrote the code, he was told that Harland Sanders, the founder of KFC, was the one responsible.

The IT guy responded, "That's what I call a Colonel Er...

I went to the doctor and he said you have the blood pressure of a 14 year old kid

I said great. He said, not so great, a 14 year old *American* child. You got four months to live.

Kids are so fat these days the first letters they learn in the alphabet are not ABC, it's KFC.

Kids are so fat these days they use cheat codes to play Pokemon Go.

Kids are so fat th...

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