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KFC

A man goes to see the pope.

"Your Holiness. I work for KFC, and we'll offer you ten million dollars to change the reading of the Lord's Prayer from 'Give us this day our daily bread' to ' Give us this day our daily chicken.'"

The pope is aghast! "I can't just go changing God's word f...

Why does KFC not have toilet paper?

It's finger licking good

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What do KFC and pussy have in common?

Answer: Both are finger lickin' good and after you are done eating you have a box to put the bone in.

Is KFC Twitter account

Veryfried?

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An attractive woman once asked if I was more interested in breasts or legs.

I told her that I was mainly into feet and anal.


I'm no longer welcome at that KFC restaurant.

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The other day a girl asked me if I like breasts or thighs. I told her I prefer bubble butts and a trimmed pussy with thin lips...

So I got kicked out of KFC.

KFC

A man from KFC arranges to visit the Pope. After receiving the papal blessing he whispers, "Your Holiness, we have a deal for you. If you change The Lord's Prayer from 'give us this day our daily bread' to 'give us this day our daily chicken' then we will donate $500 million dollars to the Church."...

My friend got a job working the counter at KFC

He didn't like it when I called him a "Chicken Tender".

The KFC near my house is haunted.

They think it's poultrygeist.

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Isn't it weird that KFC is one letter away from fuck?

New slogan: KFC, all that's missing is U

My local KFC will be celebrating Star Wars day on May 4th with an Anakin special.

It’s an extra crispy chicken with no legs and only one wing.

Why did the pastor go to KFC?

To grab some breast.

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Did you hear that KFC is serving a Taylor Swift special?

It consists of two long skinny legs, two small breasts, and a left wing.

Me and my pet Chicken walked into KFC

They thought I was giving it to them but instead I ordered a bucket for two

A chicken had a job interview at a KFC today.

It got employed immediately for the rest of its life.

Joke a kid told me today: Why did the rooster go to KFC?

He wanted to see a chicken strip

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A woman is like a bucket of KFC...

Once you're past the tender breasts and the juicy thighs all you have left is a greasy wet box to put your bone in.

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I was asked whether I prefer breasts or thighs.

I said "Well, both are nice, but I really like is a nice wet pussy". Apparently that was the wrong reply, as I'm now banned from KFC.

What's the difference between a Philosophy major and a cashier at KFC?

A job application.

What's the difference between KFC and /R/Jokes?

What you get served at KFC is original.

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How are KFC and women alike?

After the breasts and thighs all you have is a greasy box to throw your bone in.

KFC has asked scientists to edit the chicken genome.

They want something CRISPR.

I've been craving KFC for weeks...

But due to a COVID lockdown, I couldn't get it delivered.

When the lockdown was finally lifted, I made my usual order of an 8-piece bucket--extra crispy, with a side order of mashed potatoes and gravy.

I waited by the door for 5 minutes...10 minutes...15 minutes... After 20 minutes, I ...

Why is a bulimic's favorite restaurant KFC?

Cause it comes with a bucket.

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What do you call a prostitute behind a KFC?

A $5 Fill-up

All the witches be going to KFC tonight

They love some coven-ready chicken.

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I heard KFC is sponsoring the cock fighting little league.

Can’t wait to see those chick contenders.

An old lady in London...(a true story)

Around a week ago I was waiting in queue behind an old lady at KFC. She placed her order, paid in cash, and all was well until she received one of those new plastic £5 notes as change from the cashier.

She vocally expressed her dislike about the presence of animal products in the new £5 bills...

The CEO of KFC requests an audience with the Pope.

After some discussion, the CEO tells the Pope that he has a proposition. The company will make a $1 billion donation to the Catholic Church on one condition- that the Lord’s Prayer wording be officially changed from “give us this day our daily bread” to “give us this day our daily chicken.”
The p...

What do you get when you cross KFC with a gentlemen's club?

Chicken strips!

The head of KFC called the Pope

He said, "I'll give you a million dollars to change the Lord's prayer to give us our daily chicken."

The Pope said no and hung up.

KFC called back and offered 10 million.

The Pope said no and hung up.

KFC called back and offered 100 million.

The Pope said, "You hav...

What does kfc use to make its popcorn chicken?

Chicken colonels.

I was in KFC with my bro when the lights went out...

I told him that the circuits were fried

KFC is a shelter

for battered chickens

What’s the difference between an artist and a KFC chicken bucket?

A KFC chicken bucket can feed a family of 4

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I like my amputees like a good meal at KFC

Must have at least two breasts and a leg.

KFC but it could happen at Burger King too!

I went to the KFC to get the kids something to eat. They wanted the kid's meal with a leg so I said "kids meal with the leg" and the lady said, "Which side?" Me - \*Complete silence as I heavily contemplate such an odd question\* "I guess the right side, I don't know what the difference is." After s...

KFC seeks divine intervention.

When I tell this joke, I change it to Colonel Sanders making the pitch and mimic his unique voice.

KFC Pope

A salesman from KFC walked up to the Pope and offers him a million dollars if he would change "The Lord's Prayer" from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our...

How do you unlock the vault with the kfc secret recipe

With a kentuc-key

Why does Trump like KFC better than Popeye's Chicken?

Less to read

Over half of UK KFC stores have closed down after switching chicken suppliers.

It was an original recipe for disaster.

The Pope and Colonel Sanders of KFC are having a conversation about the change to the Lord's Prayer.

"Your Holiness," Sanders began. "You must make another change. Instead of give us today our daily bread, make it give us today our daily chicken."

"I cannot change these words!" The Pope was astounded. "They are ingrained in our very heritage!"

They negotiated until the Colonel finaly ...

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Have You Heard About the new KFC Hilary Clinton Special.

its 2 small breasts, 2 large thighs and 2 left wings

What do KFC customers and Hannibal Lecter have in common?

Both love fingers

Scientists analysed sweat samples of 100 regular KFC visitors.

11 secrete herbs and spices

I was surprised when a friend said he'll work at KFC right after graduation..

Out of curiosity, I asked him why.



All he said was, "It's on my bucket list."

Bob and his wife started dieting a week ago

Bob and his wife started dieting a week ago.
His wife proposed that they should have cheat day today.
She bought home McDonald's burger, KFC wings and Bob brought home his secretary

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Did you know the average blue whale has a 6 foot long penis and can produce more than 20 pounds of semen?

Turns out KFC isn’t the only animal that comes in buckets.

How did the chicken cross the road?

In a KFC 20 piece bucket

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I know I masturbate loudly, but that’s just the person I am.

And if you don’t like it, go find another KFC.

What kind of ghost haunts a KFC?

A Poultrygeist

Why did the chicken cross the road?

The answer is not quite clear but it did affect the geopolitical structure and landscape of western civilization by becoming prey for KFC.

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