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Two men walk past a slogan in the Soviet Union

The slogan reads: "We shall liberate the people of the world from the chains of capitalism!". One of the men tells the other: "This is actually true. Remember the gold chain I had?"

If Mr. Miyagi was a plastic surgeon, what would his slogan be?

Racks on, racks off.

Rejected slogan for the massage room at DisneyWorld's Grand Floridian resort:

"The only place at DisneyWorld where you can *not* get a happy ending."

I suggested an awesome product name and slogan for marketers of a data file decompression utility, but they wouldn't take me up on it.

The company's stupid focus groups thought it was inappropriate.

I mean, come on, what's wrong with:

"SIGH unzips"?

What is a good slogan for an abortion clinic?

Don’t kid yourself

Missouri’s new travel slogan.

Missouri Loves Company

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A dildo company with slogan:

"You do you"

You’ve heard of “click it or ticket”, a slogan telling drivers to use a seatbelt or they will get fined...

Now get ready for the new slogan of 2020: “Mask it or Casket”!

Canada's immigration centre has a new slogan

You'll be sorry

Did you hear what NASA's new slogan will be once their budget is cut?

"NASA: The Sky's The Limit"

The Bar & Brothel in town has quite a slogan..

Liquor up front, Poker in the rear

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Putin and Biden are wrapping up their discussion...

Putin says: "You know, Joe. I had this dream few days ago"

Biden: "Oh, what kind of dream?"

Putin: "I saw America, in flames. Nuclear warhead crater where Capitol used to be. New York leveled. Los Angeles covered in human ash. It was Glorious, Joe. I nearly teared up..."

Biden: ...

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So the police have a new slogan.

So the police in my area have a new slogan that they altered from the post office. Rain nor shine nor sleet or hail will keep your ass out of jail.

What is Yoda’s 2024 campaign slogan?

Again Great America Make

If 2020 had a slogan...

2020: "You are not the control group"

Whitehouse has a new slogan to encourage everyone to get back to work, school and boost the economy...

**!!No Lives Matter!!**

Trump's campaign slogan for the 2016 presidential election was "Make America Great Again."

Biden's campaign slogan for the current election should be "Make America Great Again."

Did you hear State Farm has a new slogan?

Like a good neighbor stay over there

I suggested a unique slogan to my favorite steak place...

We have a place for all God's creatures...right next to the mashed potatoes.

Coffin maker's new slogan

If you're coughin' you need a coffin

What should be the slogan of World Health Organization?

WHO cares!

What’s the slogan for the mediocre McDonald’s that werewolves eat at?

I’m lycan it

I told my dad the strip club had the best steaks in town. He told me what their slogan should be.

You can't beat the meat here.

Do you know why Oklahoma's state slogan is "Oklahoma is OK"?

Because they can't spell "mediocre".

If the Mexican Drug Cartel had a slogan

It would be "Putting the 'Juan' in 'Marijuana'"

I think Andrew Yang would have won the nomination with a different slogan.

“Make America >”

Curtis Jackson, aka 50 cent, considering to run for office. His first campaign slogans released.

Change we can believe in! The change we need!

Thought of a great slogan for a construction company..

We screw, we nut, we bolt.

Fox News' slogan is "Fair and Balanced".

That's it. That's the joke.

In light of the customers' data breach Capital One unveiled a new slogan today:

Who's in your wallet?

If Trump wins the presidency, what will be his reelection slogan in 2020?

Make America decent again.

Cohen Nails

Old man Cohen had immigrated to America and achieved the dream.

He started his own successful nail company. There are two kinds of people he felt, those who built the world and those who just benefited from it. So he was worried about his son as he handed over the business on retiring.
<...

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What is the name of your penis?"

The customer says "I'm not like that, man. I just want a drink". The bartender says "I can't serve you until I hear a name for your penis. For example, mine is Nike, for the slogan just do it. I'll come back in a couple minutes". The man thinks, and turns to the man on his left. He asks "What's the ...

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What would Obama's campaign slogan be if he confidently ran for office in Japan?

Shuriken

Mahatma Gandhi decides to open an all you can eat buffet

After thinking about a slogan for a while he settles on:

“Gandhi’s, when hunger strikes.”

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What was Hitlers campaign slogan?

Gotta catch them all...

My dad has a great idea for Donald Trump's campaign slogan.

"Vote for me in 2016 or there'll be hell toupée."

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I notice a lot of different plumbing trucks with the slogan, "We're #1 in the #2 business!"

One of them has to be full of shit.

The GOP announced a new slogan today...

“We’re not just morally bankrupt, *we’re Roy Mooreally bankrupt!”*

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You've likely heard the VISA slogan, "It's everywhere you want to be."

So I guess that means there are a lot of women walking around with credit cards up in their vaginas.

To all of the single women out there, I on behalf of millions of other men agree that the slogan "a best way to a man's heart is his stomach"...

should not be interpreted by vegans.

What is the worst possible slogan for someone running for president in Germany?

Make Germany great again

What's the slogan for Orion's Pizza?

OP delivers.

Not a great joke, but my wife claims no one will get it. I am trying to prove her wrong.

Slogan

A High School teacher was lecturing her class on why companies advertise and what they do to make people remember them. "That's why companies have slogans," he explained. "For example, who can tell me which company says, 'I'm loving it!'" To which the students reply, "McDonald's!" All the students k...

The camping shop in Stratford-upon-Avon is having a sale of last season's stock. Their slogan....?

Now.. is the winter of our discount tents.

Abandoned slogan: “Become an organ donor...”

“...What have you got to lose?”

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Q. What is Tampons new slogan?

A. We may not be #1 but we're up there!

California's new slogan is...

"When they go low, we get high"

I was at a beekeeper beauty pageant the other day.

Their slogan was "beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder."

A good slogan for a brothel would be....

The customer always comes first.

What's the slogan for Burger King in Israel?

Have it Yahweh

The slogan of a televangelist

"God will grant you all the money I need"

What was the slogan at "Discount Doe's" Brothel

"The best damn bang for your buck!"

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Newest tampon slogan

Did you hear the latest slogan for tampons?
"We're not #1 , but we're right up there "

Whats the Slogan for every I.T. Department in America?

"Mmmm. Move Over."

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Honest degree slogans

Diploma: Have fun with those loans, guys...

Associates: Man, fuck this.

Bachelor's: Middle class af

Masters: d i f f e r e n t i a t i o n

Doctors: You did it for the title, doc

Postdoc: The prospect of not going to school scares you.

The euthanasia clinic finally found a slogan

Kill them with kindness

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church bulletin bloopers

*These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:*
--------------------------
The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
--------------------------
The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for ...

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Slogan for a Sperm Bank Advertisement

"You squeeze it, we freeze it!"

Donald Trump has a new slogan that he hopes will help his numbers with African American voters.

"Orange Is The New Black."

Wario has just revealed his campaign slogan

'We need to build a wah'

Ronald McDonald runs for president. His slogan?

Make America's Weight A Gain.

One of Donald Trump's slogans is America First!

We'll rob the other countries later.

Mexican Hippie Slogan

We love everyjuan!!

An ambitious Chinese man named Hoo Ming wanted to run for president. He understood the problems that Americans faced every day and so he wanted to show everyone he planned to solve it by making it his slogan...

Hoo Cares!

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A woman had three daughters getting married the same day. Naturally she was worried about their sex life. It was agreed that they would send a discrete message.

Two weeks after the triple wedding the first message arrives. An ad for Maxwell House with the slogan "Good till the last drop." She's happy for her girl.

A month passes and a second message arrives with a Marlboro ad. "Marlboro: Extra long, extra strong." She's a little embarrassed, but happ...

New Subway slogan idea from Jared

12 is the new 18

Why is Diego's slogan "Go Diego Go"

It was the last thing his mother said before she got shot by the border patrol

Slogan idea for a Braille company

Loads of high quality Braille products,
many of which you've never seen before!

Second to None

When the Second Division set up shop in South Korea, it did so with its slogan proudly displayed at the front gate: "Second to None". A few months later, a South Korean base opened two miles down the road. The sign greeting visitors read "You are now entering the famed sector of the South Korean ROK...

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I'm planning on starting a strip club....

... in Poland. It will be called Pole Land.


I will hire people from ex law enforcement as strippers.


The slogan for the club will be: "Welcome to Pole Land, in Poland: Where Polish police polish your pole".

The slogan did pretty well in market research polls.

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Have you heard the slogan for Charles Dickens Brand Hard Cider?

There is nothing quite like a hard Dickens' Cider!

My neighbor grew tired of being a taxidermist after 15 years, and went to veterinarian school.

His new business never got off the ground so he decided to operate both his taxidermy and vet business together to save money. His new slogan was: "No Matter What Happens - You Get Your Cat Back."

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A bed salesman has an existential crisis and sells all of his wares for 100% off.

The sale slogan? “Fuck it, nothing really mattress.”

I get that the “#me too” movement is supposed to be empowering...

But they could’ve picked a better slogan than “PoundMeToo”

Four insurance companies are in competition.

One comes up with the slogan, "Coverage from the cradle to the grave."


The Second one tries to improve on that with, "Coverage from the womb to the tomb."


Not to be outdone, the third one comes up with, "From the sperm to the worm."


The fourth insurance company re...

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I want to start a company that makes both coffins and condoms

The slogan would be:" We've got you covered whether you cuming or going"

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Whiskas (the cat food company) are missing out on so much money

They can just start producing sex toys and they don't even have to change their slogan

"Your cat is going to love Whiskas"

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