UPJOKE
chickenbroilerpan fryingdeep fryingmiddle ageslardfast foodscottish cuisinepaprikabatterflourfrittersapiciusbreadingjoint

Cardinal: Your holiness, do you like fried chicken?

Pope:yes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do black people eat fried chicken?

Because it tastes good.

How is a woman like Kentucky Fried Chicken?

When you are finished with the breast and the thigh, you have a greasy box to stick your bone in.

What is the difference between organic fried chicken and GMO fried chicken?

It's CRISPR.

What would Napoleon Bonaparte's fried chicken restaurant be called?

The French Fries

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

New in the fast-food market: Oedipus Fried Chicken

>!It's motherfucking good!!<

What do serial killers and people who eat fried chicken have in common?

They both think the skin is the best part.

It is my first time in court and I heard the judge shouting, "Order!!"

So I replied fried chicken, mac and cheese and cola. Now I'm being escorted out by two officers. I think we are going to a restaurant.

My boss asked me why I left a bucket of fried chicken on his doorstep

I told him I was tendering my resignation

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Favorite Animal

Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken."
She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else laughed. My parents told me to always tell the truth. I did. Fried chicken is my favorite animal. I told my dad what happened, and he sai...

Three construction workers are working on top of a building

One is Chinese, one is Polish, and the other is black. On their lunch break, they open up their lunches to see what their wives packed them. The Chinese guy says, "What!? Egg rolls again!? I hate egg rolls! If I get egg rolls for lunch one more time, I'm going to jump off of this building". The blac...

[NSFW] What does China and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?

Cleaning up the bloody mess by spraying it down the drain

A Kentucky Fried Chicken lobbyist meets with the Pope.

He offers a donation of ten million dollars to the church if the Pope agrees to change the words in the Lord’s Prayer from “give us this day our daily bread” to “give us this day our daily chicken”

The Pope apologizes and says he is not interested.

“100 million dollars”, says the KFC r...

Colonel Sanders was on his deathbed and all his family were sitting around his bed.

“You must tell us the secret ingredient so we can continue to sell your fried chicken” said his oldest child.

The Colonel barely able to move , beckoned his oldest child to him , “come…” he whispered before suddenly dying.

And they haven’t changed the recipe since.

Sorry, I mad...

Why did the chicken cross the road?

It didn’t. Anyone want some fried chicken?

Harry Potter Yo Mama joke

Yo mama so fat her patronus is a fried chicken.

So Tod goes to a new truckers joint...

He sits down and the waiter approaches him.

Do you want to hear the daily specials sir? He asks.

"No thank you", says Todd, "let me smell your hand and I'll tell you want I'd like today".

So the waiter reluctantly proceeds to offer his hand to be smelled by this weird customer.<...

Wonder bread

After watching sales falling off for three straight months at Kentucky Fried Chicken, the Colonel calls up the Pope and asks for a favor.
The Pope says, "What can I do?"
The Colonel says, "I need you to change the daily prayer from, 'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'Give us this day our...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"We don't serve colored people here."

"That's alright, I don't eat colored people. Bring me a whole fried chicken."

RIP Dick Gregory

I asked my taxi driver if I could leave him some tequila and fried chicken

He said sure, so I threw up

What does Kentucky Fried Chicken and me trying to stretch out my last roll of cheap toilet paper have in common?

They're both finger licking good.

What are our names?

A hen and her chick are having a talk.
"Why do humans have names, but us chickens don't? All we have is chicken, or hen.", asks the chick.
"Well, humans may have names when they are ALIVE, but when they are dead, they are only called ghosts.", Says the hen, "but, we have lots of names when w...

When I was young I was pretty curious. I used to go to my grandpa with my questions....

Me: Grandpa, why does is it rain ?

Grandpa: Son, sometimes mama earth feels thirsty.

Me: Also why do animals die ?

Grandpa: Sometimes mama feels hungry too, bud. I think thats it for today?

Me: One more, grandpa! Why do forest fires occur? I learned about them in school t...

Whats long, black and hard to cut into?

The line at ~~Kentucky Fried Chicken.~~ Popeyes
Edit Thanks /u/SatanicOnion

My barber said this today

I used to put out fires at the local airport and I had marshmallows in my toolbox. They thought I was a little weird, but I told 'em "More often than not, you're just gonna sit back and watch it burn anyway, might as well have some marshmallows."
One day an experimental plane crashed with six p...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I looked up "cock" in the dictionary...

It says "the male of the domestic fowl or chicken". That's all my black female neighbours ever talk about, they must really love fried chicken.

Yo Mama so poor...

...that when she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken she licks other people's fingers.

A drunk guy gets into a taxi..

-Ehh.. 'scuse me, driver... would it be okay if.. I left a few beers, some fried chicken, 2 tequila shots and some rice on your back seat?

-(confused)Ehm, sure.

*#vomits#*



Sorry people, I had to.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman goes into a restaurant in a small southern town out in the country...

She orders the fried chicken and starts to eat.

Eating too fast, she chokes on a chicken bone.

Well, these two country boys in the next booth notice she is choking, and they get up and go over to help her.

The first country boy drops his coveralls and bends over, and the secon...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear? They opened a pizza place in the Vatican!

It’s called Cheesus Crust.

They only use Swiss cheese Because it’s so holy.

Their most famous topping is pope-peroni.

They’re really famous for their dough.
It takes three days to rise.

They only serve seeded olives.
Because they’re afraid of the pit.

Their...

During a Papal audience, a business man approached the Pope and made this offer:

Change the last line of the Lord's prayer from "Give us this day our daily bread" to "Give us this day our daily chicken," and Kentucky Fried Chicken will donate $10,000,000 to Catholic charities. The Pope declined.
Two weeks later, the man approached the Pope again - this time with a $50,000,000...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There is a rabbi that studied all the religions of the world. He had worked his whole life to experience them all....

He finally had studied and participated in all the world's religions, except for one. There was the small tropical island far away from civilization. This island, the Island of Trid, was populated by the local islanders, the trids. They an idyllic culture. Easy and peaceful living in harmony with th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[Long] This wealthy couple from New York made a trip down south...

To visit some relatives that retired down in Florida. They were big foodies and decided to make a stop in Tennessee because they had never had good southern food but had heard how good it was. They find a hole in the wall southern food joint and pulled their new Range Rover in between two old beat u...

Why is Chick-fil-a so successful?

They figured out how to sell fried chicken to white people.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My first OC joke. (Long)

A man walks into an antique shop. He approaches the female cashier and
asks, “Is this your store?”

She nods her head, “My parents owned it for a few decades, I had since inherited it.”

The man then asks her, “Would you like to see a magic trick?”

The woman, barley amused, dec...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.