Why doesn't Elon Musk like Taco Bell?

It gives him gas

I don't understand why some people say, "Taco Bell isn't real Mexican."

It gets the job done for less than half the cost. That's about as Mexican as it gets.

Whats the difference between my son and taco bell

I love taco bell

Taco Bell forced to shut down temporarily...

Due to the Corona virus the shortage of toilet paper has made this step a necessity.

What did Wilford Brimley get whenever he ate Taco Bell?

Diarrhetus.

You are looking through your food bag after just leaving the Taco Bell drive through and find a note written on a napkin that reads "There are 2 armed men in here".......what do you do?

Eat your food.......1 armed men can't make tacos.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I think Taco Bell was the tastiest laxative I've ever had.

I shit you not.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Love is like eating Taco Bell

It’s heaven until it all turns to shit.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why doesn't Taco Bell have a play area?

It's hard to have a good time when you're trying not to shit your pants.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Today, I ate a bunch of Taco Bell.









Lots of shit went down.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I went to Taco Bell last night,

This morning it's a pain in the ass.

I drove by the Taco Bell drive-thru last night and it was empty.

Then I realized everyone is out of toilet paper!

My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell.

Well actually he said "less McDonald's" but I'm pretty sure I know what he meant.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Have you ever use Taco Bell hot sauce as anal lube?

I hear that shit's fire.

As a good luck charm my baseball team eats taco bell before every game.

To help us get more runs than our opponent.

I noticed Taco Bell cups say "welcome to the after party" on them.

That's a harsh way to tell you that you just got diarrhea.....

I tried eating the whole Taco Bell menu once..

They kindly asked me to get off the counter

My idiot friend keeps saying, “Every time I go to Taco Bell, I get diarrhea.”

I said, “Try ordering Tacos instead, moron.”

A joke told to me today by a little old man at Taco Bell completely out of the blue

Why was the man fired from his job at the orange juice factory?

He couldn’t concentrate.

What's the difference between a hard and soft shell taco from Taco Bell?

About 25 seconds in the microwave.

DNA is like the menu at Taco Bell

Different combinations of the same four ingredients to achieve endless results.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Whats the difference between Taco Bell and a baby?

Eating a baby is a heinous deed, but eating Taco Bell makes your anus bleed.

Why did Taco Bell hire Eminem?

Because he's a Wrap God

What's Taco Bell's secret sauce recipe?

No idea, they keep it under wraps.

I'll show myself out.

I got a strange note in my bag at the Taco Bell drive-thru last night...

The lady seemed very frazzled and the note said "help there are two armed men inside."

I drove off laughing, thinking "well yeah it would take forever to make tacos with one arm"

If you mix taco bell sauce into your ramen..

It tastes exactly like poverty.

In a surprise move, Taco Bell is acquiring Taco Bueno...

It's a hostile tacover.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's common between Hitler and Taco Bell

Both are responsible for gassing lots of people.

_________
Source:


http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/skeh8/taco_bell_on_420/c4eqbvj?context=2

a guy thing..

My three year old son had a lot of problems with potty training; and I
was
on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch
in
between errands.
It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I
smelled something funny, so of course, I che...

Two blonde Mexican girls walk past a Taco Bell.

One looks at the other and says "Hey, I didn't know we owned a telephone company."

What did the EMT say to the choking guy at Taco Bell?

Live más.

Growing up in Canada, Taco Bell commercials were surprisingly different.

At the end of each ad, they sang: "Make a run...for the border. And then the next border."

Why won't Caitlyn Jenner go to Taco Bell?

She doesn't want another Bell not accepting her for who she is.

Did r/jokes hear about the new Taco Bell Express yet?

You give them 99c, and they throw a burrito in the toilet for you.

Me: looks like taco bells closed, sign says short staff

Dad: well damnit! They should have hired taller people!!

What do you mean gas shortage

There's plenty of Taco Bells in the US

I got gas today for $1.39.

Unfortunately it was at Taco Bell.

Rich people have...

Rich people have colon cleanses
Poor people have taco bell

What is the name Tinkerbell’s Mexican sister?

Taco Bell.

I love Taco Bell so much that I even enjoy being *asked* what style of tacos I want...

I get hard every time.

Why wasn't Taco Bell featured at the White House's fast food feast?

Because Trump would have expected them to pay for the whole meal.

What do you call a Taco Bell merged with a Weinerschnitzel?

A beanerschnitzel.

I’m so sorry...

Did you know you can discharge all four states of matter out of your ass?

Just eat Taco Bell to discharge plasma.

Jealous of the success of the Travis Scott burger, Kylie Jenner has signed a deal with a competing chain.

Coming soon: Eat Kylie's Taco at a Taco Bell near you.

I got gas today for $1.49.

I couldn't believe it was that cheap. Then again, I don't know what else I expected going to Taco Bell.

Bought a huge flatscreen tv for $20 in an alley way after eating fast food

But when I got home and plugged it in a big Taco Bell menu popped up

native spanish speakers: our language has existed for over 1500 years and is the second-most spoken on earth

**taco bell:** cool... well we made up some new words for y’all

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I expect today to be a really shitty day...

May as well start it off with Taco Bell for breakfast.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I masturbate fully naked

Don’t like it? Go to a different Taco Bell

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three doggos

Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female Poodle.
The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time.
The males are speechless before her beauty,...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

All of this toilet paper hoarding is going to lead to a toilet paper mafia and, eventually, Godfather

And he’ll say, “You come to me on the day of Taco Bell, and you ask me for a favor. “

What do you call a beautiful woman who likes Mexican food?

Taco Belle.

Did you know Tinker Bell got a fat older brother?

His name is Taco Bell.

Condoms galore

Nike Condoms: Just do it.


Toyota Condoms: Oh what a feeling.


Diet Pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby.


Pringles Condoms: Once you pop, you can't stop.


Mentos Condoms: The freshmaker.


Flintstones Vitamins Condom Pack: T...

A girl reaches out to me on Tinder and asks "If you could be any type of taco, what would would you be, and why?"

I reply "I would be a Taco Bell crunchy taco so that eleven of my friends and I could come inside one box."

So I'm sitting there watching TV with my dad when commercials come on.

T.V.: *"Taco Bell's taco 12-pack says, 'my 11 friends and I are set..."*

Me: "HA! More like I'M set."

Dad: "I know, right? You don't even have 11 friends."

I can be the Taco Beast...

...If you're my Taco Belle!

What is you’re best taco/ Mexican food pun?

Hey reddit! So currently I work at Taco Bell taking orders in the drive thru. With covid-19 all going around, a lot of people have been more down compared to before. So I’ve been trying to make their days somewhat better. The conversation usually goes like this:
Me: “hi welcome to Taco Bell, how ...

Things that we wished were delivered

1. Taco Bell

2. OP

3.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

On Top of The Toilet - The_Merciless_Potato

A crappy feeling's comin' over me

There is defecation in 'most everything I see

Not a toilet in sight, ate a taco and some fries

And I won't be surprised if it's a stream



Every worst food-combo in the world

Is now coming true especially inside me

And...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Topical Joes (5/13)

Alright guys, here we are to recap the day's jokes. Let's get started.

First off in the news, it looks like the TSA arrested a woman for singing Whitney Houston on an airplane - but you should've seen what the TSA did when they caught those ridiculous musical militants of the Elton Jihad.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Topical Jokes (5/14)

Folks, folks. What a day! There are some good jokes out there to be had. Let's take a gander, shall we?

There's already some news out of the presidential election front...

Some are reporting Gov. Christie is losing weight just so he can make a run in 2016. Not to be outdone, Sen. Rubio...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.