So I was eating out at a steak house the other night when some guy complained that the sign said Halal...

He said his beef should be killed the **American way**, to that all I could think is does he really expect a cow to enrol in a high school just to get shot by one of its peers?

What did the halal lettuce say to the halal cucumber ?

Lets make salat

What do you call a Halal pie?

Allah mode.

Halal meat

I see that in the US they're complaining about halal meat. They want their meat to be killed the American way... but, honestly, what are the chances of a cow enrolling in high school and being shot by a classmate?

I started a fried chicken joint. In order to be halal, the chickens must be killed in the traditional Islamic manner:

It's pretty hard getting the little explosive-filled vests on them, though.

People in China eat all kinds of crazy foods

But for some reason they only take halal organ donors

Lionel Ritchie

So Lionel Ritchie has just opened up his own chain of Muslim butcher shops.
His slogan is gonna be... Halal!! Is it meat you're looking for

What do you call a Muslim pepper?

A halal-peno.

I’m sorry.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

These puns are Capital!

So I had a productive day at work coming up with these Capital City puns a year ago today. Thought they were too good not to share!

Why did the Geordie arrange a holiday to Romania?

To book a rest!

Bob Mortimer was speaking to his comedy partner's wife saying he wanted to take h...

What do you call a Muslim guy who won’t date fat chicks?

Shallow Halal.

Which rapper is the most acceptable to Muslims?

Halal Cool J

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