Colonel Sanders calls up the pope.

"Your holiness", he says. "My business is losing money and I need help. I'll donate 10 million dollars to the Vatican if you change the Lord's prayer from 'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'Give us this day our daily chicken'".

"I'm sorry, Mr. Sanders" the pope replies. "I cannot change t...

Ever hear Colonel Sanders playing guitar?

Well he’s finger-pickin’ good!

The Pope and Colonel Sanders of KFC are having a conversation about the change to the Lord's Prayer.

"Your Holiness," Sanders began. "You must make another change. Instead of give us today our daily bread, make it give us today our daily chicken."

"I cannot change these words!" The Pope was astounded. "They are ingrained in our very heritage!"

They negotiated until the Colonel finaly ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I am making a movie on Colonel Sanders, titled

To Kill A Fucking Bird

The Pope and Colonel Sanders

When KFC sales hit a lean patch, Colonel Sanders came up with a brilliant advertising idea.

He got in touch with the Pope and asked the pontiff whether he could change the words of the Lord's Prayer from "Give us this day a daily bread" to "Give us this day a daily chicken."

"I can't p...

General Tso...Colonel Sanders...

What is it with these high ranking military men making chicken?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was.

I said, "Fried chicken."

She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else laughed.

My parents told me to always tell the truth. I did. Fried chicken is my favorite animal.

I told my dad what happened, and he said my teacher was probably a member o...

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

DONALD TRUMP: I've been told by my many sources, good sources - they're very good sources - that the chicken crossed the road. All the Fake News wants to do is write nasty things about the road, but it's a really good road. It's a beautiful road. Everyone knows how beautiful it is.

JOE BIDEN:...

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Colonel Sanders wanted to show him a secret...

If all of the Democratic candidates this primary had military experience...

...then, in theory, we could have seen a race between G.I. Joe and Colonel Sanders.

Yo mama is so fat that she is voting for Sanders

COLONEL SANDERS

KFC seeks divine intervention.

When I tell this joke, I change it to Colonel Sanders making the pitch and mimic his unique voice.

KFC Pope

A salesman from KFC walked up to the Pope and offers him a million dollars if he would change "The Lord's Prayer" from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our...

So a priest walks by a bunch of children standing around a dog.

> Alright, I can't claim this joke. I took it from the chaplain of the New Orleans Saints doing a workshop. Check out his [talk](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jIG72_LO7wc), he's pretty cool. www.fathertony.com

There were a couple of kids that were laughing and standing around a dog that...

Your momma's so stupid...

...she asked what army Colonel Sanders was in.

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