Two well dressed lawyers, Milind Kale and Ram Jethmalani went to an expensive restaurant...

They ordered 2 coffees
and then took out sandwiches from their briefcases to eat...

Waitress: Sorry Sir !!! But you can't eat your OWN food here... Its against the rules ...

The lawyers quietly looked at each other and
EXCHANGED their sandwiches & continued their meals!
<...

If you drink 2 glasses of Kale juice daily, it will destroy your belly fat and

Your desire to live too.

Why should you cook kale in coconut oil?

Makes it easier to slide it right into the trash.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Kale is a negative calorie food,

meaning the kale itself contains fewer calories than your body uses to throw it up because it's so fucking disgusting.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the vegan eat packaged meat?

It was safer than the kale that asshole teens coughed on.

Kale.

I prefer mine with a silent "K"

I have now survived 21,364 days and 13 hours without using essential oils or eating kale.

Thank you for your prayers and support during these trying times.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man begins to hear a voice in his head,

quiet, but insistent, it repeats urgently, "Sell your house, take all your money, go to Las Vegas." The man ignores it at first, he sees a therapist, does yoga and eats kale, but nothing stops the voice from repeating the same sentence, "Sell your house, take all your money, go to Las Vegas."
...

What's a white supremacist's favorite leafy green?

K-K-Kale

What did the homicidal vegetarian say?

I would kale for some salad.

What do vegan white nationalists chant at rallies?

Sieg-Kale, Sieg-Kale!

Just started my Vegan diet.

They're a bit chewy, but better than kale.

Told my Vegan Friend to stop with the Puns.

He said oh kale no

What did the creators of Good Burger call their vegan cooking show?

Quinoa and Kale

I dunno why people say hurtful things like...

"Wanna go for a run?"
or "Try this kale."

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