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Inventor Jokes

What did people say when the inventor of the Dry Erase Board showed off his new invention.

That's Remarkable!

Terrible joke, came to me on the toilet early, but I had to say it. And it's also likely be told in some form before.

The inventor of the USB stick has died

At his funeral they gently lowered the coffin, then pulled it back up, turned it the other way, then lowered it again.

The inventor of the wind chill factor died this week.

He was 86 but felt more like he was 64.

Not NSFW: The inventor of Velcro died today.

RIP

The inventor of autocorrect died today

His funfair will be hello on sundial

The inventor of autocorrect died

The funnel will be held tomato.

Inventor displays the first knife ever.

His friend, "that's the greatest invention since bread"
Inventor, "well I'm about to blow your mind"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The inventor of the Hospital Gown

Did you know the inventor of the hospital gown was Seymour Butts?

Blonde Inventor.

Blonde:1: I have invented a parachute that gets you down faster and it opens 3 foot from the ground.

Blond:2: But what happens if it doesn't open?

Blonde:1: Doh, anyone can jump 3 feet.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The inventor of anagrams died today.

May he 'erect a penis'.

The inventor of the umbrella was actually just going to call it brella

But he hesitated

The inventor of Tetris died recently and the casket was buried vertically...

And then the entire graveyard disappeared

The inventor of auto correct died today.

His fun fair is next monkey

Larry Tesler, inventor of the cut, copy, and paste commands, dies at 74

Larry Tesler, inventor of the cut, copy, and paste commands, dies at 74

The inventor of the ferris wheel never met the inventor of the merry-go-round

They moved in different circles.

Sir John Harrington, inventor of the modern flush toilet is well remembered for two reasons:

Number 1 and Number 2

Stephen Wilhite, one of the lead inventors of the GIF, passed away last week at the age of 74

Jodspeed, Stephen.

Swedish inventors have created cyborgs which are hard to distinguish from real humans.

Critics are concerned about the use of artificial Swedeners.

The inventor of the chicken tikka masala has died

Just before he passed he slipped into a korma

The inventor of Dulex weathershield exterior paint has perished while attempting to climb Everest …

Rescuers said he could have done with another coat

The inventor of the crossword puzzle moved into my neighbourhood.

He lives five streets down and two houses across.

An inventor has created a very fancy diaper changing table

It will be called the "Shart-Tooterie Board"

(stolen from a friend of mine)

Karl Marx is a historically famous philosopher and political theorist,

but very few people know about his sister,

Onya, the inventor of the starter pistol.

The Inventor of AutoCorrect died

The Inventor of AutoCorrect died.

Condiments are roaring in.

* He will be mist
* He was a very general food man
* He was killed in four luggages
* He is in a wetter place
* Paying for his knife and Emily
* Send flours and dalmations to---
* May he roast in piece
...

Why did the Inventor of sandals take back his claim for a patent?

He got cold feet

What was the inventor of the Fleshlight thinking?

If I build it, they will cum.

The inventor of the gif has died...

I expect we'll see many moving tributes.

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An inventor goes to the bank for help with funding...

(Many years on Reddit and I've never seen this joke that a customer told my brother and I while we were waiting tables in Yellowstone.)

An inventor goes into a bank for a loan:
The banker across the desk says "Pitch me your idea."
The inventor hands him an apple.
The banker is alre...

The inventor of autocorrect walks into a bar.

He asks for a bear

Bill Gates dies and goes to heaven,

where Saint Peter gives him a nice, modern six-bedroom house with a pretty garden and a tennis court. Pleased with his lot, Bill quickly settles into the afterlife.

One day he is out walking when he bumps into a man wearing a fine tailored suit.

"That's really nice," says Bill. "Where ...

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The inventor...

... of the sexual innuendo has passed away.



His wife is taking it very hard.

The inventor of inappropriate innuendo jokes died suddenly yesterday.

His wife is taking it really hard.

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Bra Inventor

A scientist has invented a bra that keeps women’s breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in.



"Women need not worry, we have killed that bastard"

Is it true that the inventor of fractions was...

...Louis the 1/16th?

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Inventor

So there is an inventor who is walking into a patent office, when he gets there he puts an apple on the table.

"I want to patent this" he said

The other guy looked at him, confused.

"I'm pretty sure you can't patent a normal apple, is this a joke?"

"Taste it," he said
...

The inventor of sliced bread

Is likely the one that cut the cheese.

The Goldberg Brothers - Are well known as the Inventors of the automobile Air Conditioner.

Here's a little known fact for automotive buffs, or just to dazzle your friends. The four Goldberg brothers, Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Maxwell, invented and developed the first automobile air-conditioner. On July 17, 1946 , the temperature in Detroit was 97 degrees. 


The four brothers ...

Inventors

Tesla, Ford, and Edison were all standing on a stage, presenting their latest findings.

Tesla strolled forward and announced that he had invented a brand new way to transmit energy through the air! The crowd clapped politely.

Ford was next, and pulled the cover off a large engine. He ...

Sadly the inventor of the USB port died recently. . .

They are still trying to figure out which way to put his casket into the ground.

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Henry Heimlich, inventor of the Heimlich maneuver, was getting frustrated.

Everywhere he went, people pretended they were choking to see what he would do. One day, he visited England. During a banquet with the royal family, the Queen grabbed her throat and bent over. Heimlich ignored her, and she confessed that she was faking. Later, he passed a prince on the street, and t...

Yo Mamma is like the inventor of the steamboat

They’re both a Fulton

The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven.

At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur. 'Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want to in heaven.'

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, 'I want to hang out with God.'

St. Peter took Ar...

The inventor of the ballet skirt was struggling for a name for his invention.

Finally he put tu and tu together.

The Inventor of the Cassette Tape Died This Week...

But his memory will never be erased.

It will get a bit fuzzy over time though.

What award did the inventor of knock knock jokes recieve?

The No Bell Prize

The inventor of the light bulb

Certainly had a bright future

The inventor of Winrar has been arrested

His trial is expected to last forever

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An inventor invented a lie detector...

And decided to try it out with his family before commercializing it.

His wife provides him with the perfect opportunity: Darling I think our son watches porn.

Husband: Lets find out. Son, what did you do this afternoon when you stayed in your room?

Son: Homework

*BEEP*...

An computer inventor starts talking to his friend.

“I’ve almost made a human-like robot!” He says.
“You mean it can think?” His friend replies.
“No, but when it fails, it puts the blame on the back of another computer.”

The inventor of the TASER gun recently died.

Both friends and enemies
were stunned!

What happened to the inventor of the inflatable shoe?

He popped his clogs.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The inventor of the snooze button just died.

His funeral will take place tomorrow at 8:00, 8:05, 8:10 and 8:15.

USB Inventor

When the inventor of the usb dies thay will lower him slowly stop flip the Casket and put him in all the way

The inventor of Twister has died...

...Police say "foul play cannot be ruled out".

A reporter goes to see an inventor who claims to have invented a machine that can answer any question

The reporter is asked to speak his question into the microphone and the machine will answer it with 100% accuracy.

Sceptical but curious the reporter starts easy, "Where is my mother?"

The machine bleeps and buzzes and then announces "Your mother is at her book club, they have just rev...

The inventor of the air conditioner has died

Thousands of fans are attending his funeral

A brilliant inventor creates a brand new type of leather.

This leather is such an amazing product, the inventor is convinced he's made his legacy. He starts a company that manufactures clothes made out of this new leather material, and it instantly becomes a massive success. Everybody went crazy for their products, and the company's leather jeans in parti...

I can't remember the name of superhero who is an inventor

Is it Elon man?

The inventor of the remote control died.

But now nobody can find him...

I'd like to congratulate the inventor of the wobbly table

He must be successful with them being in every restaurant and cafe

An eccentric dutch inventor whom invented inflatable shoes has died.

A member of the family said it was only a matter of time until he popped his clogs.

When the inventor of Tetris, Alexey Pajitnov, died, his coffin was put into the ground.

Then the entire cemetery disappeared.

What did the Velcro inventor’s grave say?

RIP

The inventor of the dissapointing punchline has died

His funeral will be held on Thursday at 2pm.

The inventor of the USB drive passed away recently.

There was some trouble getting his body in the coffin.

With my time machine, I traveled back to 1945 to show the inventor of Doc Martens my shiny new boots...

Do you think I created a Pair O' Docs?

What was the inventor of suspenders awarded for their discovery?

The no-belt prize.

The inventor of AutoCorrect...

...is a stupid mass hole. He can fake right off.

The inventor of glass coffins was asked would his failing business ever succeed.

He replied. Remains to be seen.

Did you know the inventor of the typewriter was unknown until recent discoveries in China?

The new discoveries point to a man named Tye Ping

The inventor of the Big Mac died the other day....

His family ordered the most lavish coffin they could find in the brochure, but were extremely disappointed when it turned out to be nothing like the picture.

The inventor of the jigsaw puzzle has died today...

...his wife is said to be in 1500 pieces!

An inventor is about to pass, leaving all he has to his only family. His two children.

He was a very altruistic person in life, only using his inventions to help people and not make any profit. His daughter admired this trait and followed this path becoming a tinkerer herself. His son, however, was an opportunist. He would always attempt to make a profit off any of his father's invent...

The inventor of the Oxford Comma has died.

Tributes have been lead by JK Rowling, his wife and the Queen of England.

I bought a new book yesterday. It's the Biography of Jimmy Scotch, the inventor of "Scotch Tape"

Unfortunately I couldn't find the beginning.

What was the name of the Italian inventor who hated Christmas?

Leonardo da Grinchi

When the chair was invented, the inventor’s friend wanted to know what it did.

The inventor replied: ‘You might want to sit down for this.’

Did you hear about the depressed genius inventor?

He made a device to electrocute himself... He was shocked when it failed.

The inventor of ibuprofen, Stewart Adams, died today at 95 years old.

The priest got up to present the eulogy NSAID he was a lovely bloke.

The inventor of the light bulb has recently been diagnosed with depression.

I wonder how many people it took to change him.

The inventor of dog treats died earlier today.

He was a good boy. Yes he was.

The inventor of distorted mirrors has passed away.

His funeral will be held in asymmetry.

I met the inventor of the trampoline.

He's an all round nice guy, but a bit jumpy.

I once dated the inventor of the stopwatch.

That was my 15.535 seconds of fame.

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An inventor, Liam, builds a humanoid lie detector robot that can slap you if you lie. As with all his inventions, his family will be the first round of test subjects.

At dinner, the inventor asks his son Jimmy about his day.

"I was at Scotts, we were studying for mid-terms."

The robot suddenly springs to life, slapping the son hard upside the head.

"Ow, what the fucking shit?" Jimmy exclaims angrily.

Liam looks at his son with a bemu...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The inventor of the Fleshlight, frustrated with his wife for refusing his sexual advances, hears a voice one night...

"If you build it you will cum!"

I met the inventor of the crossword last week.

Can't remember his name. P something T something R.

What did the inventor of the vacuum cleaner say to the child he never wanted?

Dyson

What's the one thing that Kevin Costner and the inventor of the vibrator have in common?

They both heard voices saying "if you build it, they will come."

The inventor of large scholarly books showed me his factory.

He said, "Make yourself a tome."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The anal dildo was invented entirely spontaneously...

From what I hear, the inventor just pulled it out of his ass

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