Another wooden ball?

Would it kill the makers of avocados to include a different toy, like a mood ring or a novelty eraser?

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Joined a poker club

Just signed up for poker at a club and all the members have these "lucky charms" on the table this guy has a glass cube with a 4 leaf clover in it that girl has a mini bronze doggie statue, you get the point. So the next week I wanted bring a charm to fit in, but I forgot but the novelty store next ...

I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer today

Isnt it funny what you can find in pharmacies' gift/novelty shops?

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Simon the prawn is sick of being chased by the other creatures in the lagoon.

He prays to god to make him into a fierce shark and turn the tables on his enemies.


The next day simon has been turned into a Great white shark and has great fun chasing all his enemies round, but soon starts to enjoy bullying all the other creatures too.

After a few days the no...

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My wife made me some novelty tickets to exchange for sexy times.

Sadly she didn't make me any backstage passes.

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I don’t quite know what it is about tight fitting shorts that turns me on so much.

Normally I wear a size L.

I wore a size M and it felt great at the start but the novelty soon wore off. I thought I’d really spice things up by squeezing into an S.

It was deeply erotic but they stopped the blood to my legs and hurt my testicles.

So I went to the doctors and ...

One day a man hears that a distant uncle passed away

He's a little sad, but only a little, for they barely knew each other. Then, a few days later, a package arrives. It contains his inheritance from the estate: A violin and a painting. He has no idea what to do with them. After pondering the matter, he takes them to an appraiser. Not too long later t...

A duck waddles into a bar

He goes up to the bartender and quacks, "Got any duck food?" The bartender says no and the duck waddles right back out.

Next day, there's the duck again. Once again he asks, "Got any duck food?" After the bartender says no again, the duck waddles away.

This goes on for weeks. Every day...

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Dating a virgin

One day as I was walking around in the mall, I crossed paths with a cute but very thick girl with a very pretty smile. I screwed up enough courage to smile at her and say hello. Apparently that was enough for her to take interest, and even though I wasn't that into her once the initial novelty wore ...

I often go to fancy dress parties dressed as a shark....

Quite honestly, the novelty is wearing a little fin

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Spider Webs

There was once a young biologist who was researching the eating patterns of spiders. There wasn't much demand for biologists in his local area so he worked as a taxi driver by day, it was a steady job but there was long hours and pay wasn't very good. He spent his nights collecting spiders and bugs ...

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