UPJOKE
airshipdirigiblegraf zeppelinfriedrichshafenbiplaneballoonblimpduraluminaircraftworld war ihelicopteruss los angelesairplanejethovercraft

A young boy is listening to the radio in the car with his father. “Dad, what music did you like growing up?”

“I was a huge fan of Led Zeppelin,” the father replies.

“Who?” the son asks.

“Yeah,” the dad responds, “I liked them too.”

Led Zeppelin obsession

My girlfriend came in with tears in her eyes, saying she prayed and prayed that I would end my obsession with Led Zeppelin.

I told her, "Crying won't help ya. Praying won't do you no good."

Why did Jeffrey Epstein love Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven?

...Cause it's in A minor.

Me and my friends have achieved the level of Led Zeppelin's members in musicianship.

The drummer plays the drums like Jimmy Page, the guitarist plays the guitar like John Bonham, the bassist plays the bass like Robert Plant and I sing like John Paul Jones.

Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin agreed to take care of each other’s gardens.

This means Roger Waters Robert’s Plants.

Why don't the guys from Led Zeppelin use parking meters?

Because they have No Quarter.

The other day I decided to buy a Ouija board, so I could get in touch with deceased celebrities that havent crossed over yet,

The only celebrity I could get in touch with was Stephen Hawking.

I asked him a few questions including why he was a ghost and not gone to the after life yet.

Turns out Led Zeppelin was right all along,

there is a stairway to heaven.

I tried rocking my newborn daughter to sleep.

Apparently she isn't a big Zeppelin fan.

How do Led Zeppelin band members announce that they're climaxing?

Valhalla, I am coming!

What is Popeye's favorite Led Zeppelin song?

Olive My Love

Why did the rookie technician allow a German zeppelin to fly over Allied airspace?

It was just a blimp on the radar.

What do Led Zeppelin and New Orleans have in common

"When the Levi breaks, we have no place to stay"

LED Zepplin

I had one of those lightbulb moments today and I just realized that LED Zeppelin was really ahead of their time. Way more energy efficient than those filament or halogen zeppelins.

What is Santa’s favorite band?

Sled Zeppelin

What do you call an airship made up of lights?

An LED Zeppelin

What do you call a blimp with lots of light-emitting diodes?

LED Zeppelin

A collection of Waspy jokes about yo-mamma

1. Your mother is so déclassé, she has a time-share
near Sea World!

2. Your mother is so prescription drug dependent,
she pops Xanax like Godiva bonbons!

3. Your mother is so lower middle-class, she thinks
Egyptian cotton smells of camels!

4. Your mother...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is the difference between Trump and the Hindenburg?

One is a flaming nazi gasbag and the other is a zeppelin.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.