UPJOKE
divideslashshrinkacceleratelengthwisedoublingstabilizewipeballoonedarithmeticfractionreducereducinghalvingstave

Halving Jokes

What might you catch an ABBA-obsessed assassin doing?

Halving the time of your life.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar

The first mathematician orders a beer

The second orders half a beer

"I don't serve half-beers" the bartender replies

"Excuse me?" Asks mathematician #2

"What kind of bar serves half-beers?" The bartender rema...

What did the magician’s assistant say after the show?

Thank you for halving me!

Canadian joke eh!

Why did the Northwest Territories split?

They were halving Nunavut.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The teacher asked the hottest girl in my math class to divide 13,939,393,938 by 2.

The student got to work, and as she did, her breathing became deeper and more rapid. A pink blush appeared on her cheeks and she clutched the pencil more tightly as she wrote. The class was stunned as we watched her begin to writhe in her seat. Soon she began to moan and mutter, "oh, my God!" Still,...

Two cannibals were sharing a person

One starts at the head, the other at the feet.

After a time one asks, "you alright?"

The other replies, "yeah I'm halving a ball!"

To which the first says, "you're going too fast!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the pissed-off cartographer tasked with redrawing the map of Canada's largest territory?

He was halving Nunavut.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

He's dead Doc!

An old man and his wife are having trouble in the bedroom. They visit their Doctor for help.

He recommends viagra but is a concerned about the man's age so suggests halving the dose. "Take it Monday, skip Tuesday, take it Wednesday, skip Thursday and so on ".

A few weeks later the do...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.