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Gasses Jokes

A lot of gasses are pretty cheap...

But helium just keeps going up.

Helium walks into a bar, the bartender says "we don't serve noble gasses here"...

helium doesn't react.

I told a joke about noble gasses the other day.

There was no reaction.

Why did nobody laugh when the king farted?

Noble gasses don't cause a reaction

Helium walks into a bar and orders a beer.

The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve noble gasses here". He doesn't react, because living a society that systematically discriminates against noble gasses has taught him that getting angry will only bring violence upon him. He totally writes an angry tumblr post about it later that evening thou...

What's the difference between a 19th-century American pioneer and a termite exterminator?

One passes through the good west and the other gasses through the wood pests.

Chemistry jokes

1. Did you hear about the chemist who got cooled to -273.15°C? He's 0K now.

2. What's the most electronegative state? Fluorida.

3. Wanna hear a joke about sodium bromite? NaBrO

4. Helium walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says "We don't serve noble gasses here!" H...

An old lady goes to a doctor with a flatulence problem

"Doctor please help me with my gasses. Its so embarassing, in fact since Ive gotten here I passed gas a dozen times. Lucky for me it doesnt smell or make a sound but please doctor help."

The doctor gave her a prescription and told her to come back in 2 weeks. 2 weeks pass and the old lady ret...

Three atoms, hydrogen, helium, and oxygen walk into a bar.

They go up to the bartender, Germanium, and start to order their drinks, but soon realise they are short on cash.

Hydrogen says to Germanium, "Hey man, we've had a long week, bonding is hard. If we can make you laugh, can we drink for free tonight?"

Germanium thinks about it for a min...

There was once a man who woke up every morning and farted really loudly...

Every day he would wake up, release the pressure, and his wife would say in disgust "one of these days, you're going to fart your guts out". So one Thanksgiving, the wife got up early to start fixing the feast for the day. As she was removing the giblets from the turkey, she had an idea. Sneaking...

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