Where do you find fat students and faculty?

In the hippocampus.

The Right Choice

An angel suddenly appears at a faculty meeting and tells the dean of the college that, in return for his unselfish and exemplary behavior, he will be given his choice of infinite wealth, wisdom or beauty. Without hesitating, the dean selects infinite wisdom. "Done!" says the angel, and disappears i...

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A faculty of engineering professors are invited to board a plane

After everyone had been seated, they were all informed that the plane had been designed and built by their own students. Upon learning this information, the professors got up and began running desperately to get out of the plane, almost in panic. Only one professor stayed serene in his place. When a...

Back in 1921, a member of the faculty in a London medical college was appointed an honorary physician to the king.



He proudly wrote a notice on the blackboard in his classroom:

"Professor Jennings informs his students that he has been appointed honorary physician to His Majesty, King George."

When he returned to the class-room in the afternoon he found written below his notice this line:...

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Marine Biologist

My uncle is a marine biologist who grew up in Kansas. He moved to Los Angeles for grad school and never left. His first real job was as a lab tech at USC, where he spent several years before stumbling into a part-time instructor job, which he finally parlayed into a tenured faculty position. The wor...

In honor of the OU/Texas A&M game....

Bubba Jenkins had been attending A&M for 8 years without graduating. Finally, the faculty breaks down and agrees that if he can answer one math question, they'd allow him to graduate. The entire student body is gathered in the auditorium. A professor asks, "Bubba, what is 7 times 7?"

He t...

Jake and Phil were best friends, in a mental asylum.

They had done everything together. They ate together, shared jokes together and in general had a solid friendship. One day, while the asylum had organized a swimming event, Phil started to drown. He had never learned to swim: however, his friend Jake knew how. So, seeing his friend in danger, decide...

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Kid learns "fancy" words. #1

young Tommy had gotten in trouble at school one day and after a series of events was on the verge of being expelled from his elementary school. To save face the boy's parents invited the superintendent and a few select teacher's over for dinner to discuss Tommy's future at the school. The young boy ...

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An English couple have a child

After the birth, medical tests reveal that the child is normal, apart from the fact that it is German. This, however, should not be a problem. There is nothing to worry about. As the child grows older, it dresses in lederhosen and has a pudding bowl haircut, but all its basic functions develop norma...

A goddess appears out of nowhere during an academic meeting.

The assembled faculty are dumbstruck as she hovers over the conference table. The goddess floats to a place directly in front of the school's philosophy professor. She speaks to him.

"You are a virtuous mortal. I have decided to grant you a wish. I will give you unfathomable wealth or ultimat...

This doctor is so lucky

An E.N.T. Professor retired from college. In the farewell college faculty
gifted him a silver ear.
Thanking the faculty the professor said: “Thank god I am not a gynecologist.”

It's Obvious...

So two mathematicians meet in the corridor of their building and one asks the other "so what are you working on?" The second mathematician replies "I've been working on this interesting proof, come into the lounge and I'll show you".

The two go into the faculty lounge and the guy starts to wo...

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