Jake decided to send his good friend, Thomas, a bouquet of flowers to celebrate Thomas's business expansion.

He called a florist in Thomas' local area and made arrangements- flowers, personalized note, vase, and so forth.

A week later, Thomas called Jake, confused. "Jake- what the hell? The florist dropped off a bouquet of lilies with a message that says 'Rest in peace.'"

Jake realizes the fl...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two boys in Egypt free a crocodile...

In a small village in Egypt lived two orphan boys, Set and Amenhotep. They always watched out for each other, well past their years of childhood and into their time as young adults.

One day, the two were walking outside the village when they saw a crocodile trapped in a poacher’s snare. The t...

14. Having your title be an extension of the post as well

Things I hate

1 Lists

2 Irony

4 Numbers being out of order

5 Skipping numbers

F Inconsistency

7 Repetition

7 Repetition

8 Speling wurdz rong

9 DLC

10 Replying to your own comment

Edit: 11 Edited posts

Buy the Reddit ...

A physicist flirts with a fat lady.

Physicist: Hey lady, you know why you're hot?

Fat lady: (surprised and shocked) I don't know, why?

Physicist: (whispers) Thermal Expansion!

Fat lady: *slaps*

Manufacturer closes before Christmas

The town manufacturer moved their operations to another country, to pay lower wages. The people who worked in the town, lost their jobs and were suddenly thrust into poverty.

An entrepreneur heard about this situation. Joseph P Klanta was operating several manufacturing operations. His s...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Donkey And Bishop

A preacher wanted to earn money for the building expansion program of his church. He had heard there was big money in horse racing, so he decided to purchase a horse and enter him in the races. However, at the local auction the going price for horses was too steep and the preacher ended up buying a ...

The Case of St. Peter v. Lucifer

St. Peter gets up one day and goes out the gates of heaven, to see the gates of hell have moved forward by a large distance. According to the agreement between heaven and hell, they must each come to an agreement anytime there is an expansion. He walks down to the gates, and meets the devil, sayin...

iPhone 7 is revolutionary!

•no headphones jack
•no wireless charging
•no curved screen
•no 4K resolution (or even full HD) screen
•no VR headset support
•no 360 camera support
•no expansion storage slot

It is true revolution in scamming people to upgrade from old iPhones!

What do you call a hot high school math teacher?

Expansion of minors

Four people, each of them being from different professions define a kiss.

Mathematician: 2 divided by nothing.
Physicist: Expansion of the heart and contraction of the lips.
Marketing specialist: A thing which is profitable when returned back.
Economist: A thing which is high in demand but low in supply.

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