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Inflation

Three generations of prostitutes are all living in one house. One day the daughter prostitute comes home.

"I just got $40 for a blowjob!" she says.

"Thats ridiculous!" says the mother prostitute, "back in my day I only got $20 dollars for a blowjob!"

The grandmother prostitute p...

Do you remember when air was free at the gas station, and now it's $1.50? You know why?

Inflation


Holy smokes this blew up, THANK YOU all for the awards and the silver!!

inflation

There’s the story of an old lady selling pretzels for 25 cents on a corner in New York. Every day a young man passes her at lunchtime and drops a quarter in the cup but doesn’t take a pretzel. She never says a word. He does this for three years, until one day he drops the quarter in her cup and she ...

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The sex position 69 will now be called 96

This is due to inflation, the cost of eating out increased.

Given inflation...

...when does Nickelback become Dimeback?

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Inflation

My wife and I like to have economic discussions in the bedroom. After one vigorous discussion about the buying power of the dollar, my wife told me "I'll show you inflation!"

I replied "I've already seen your ass tonight."

I went to the petrol station to pump up the tyres on my car...

So I went to compressor and put 20p in the machine and it didn't work, tries it again and still no joy...

So I walked into the shop and said to guy behind the counter 'Hey man I think your machines broken I keep trying my 20p but it won't turn on...'

He replies to me 'its 50p now that'...

Why does Tom Brady hate investing cryptocurrancy

Because it could lead to inflation.

"What is inflation?" asked the CA's wife

"Initially you were 36-24-36, and now you're 48-40-48. So technically, you have more than you had earlier, but your value is less than earlier. THIS IS INFLATION"

Economics is not so difficult if we have the right examples.

I went to the petrol station to pump up my car tyre...

and the guy charged me 50p. I said “it was only 20p last week”. He said “that’s the price of inflation”

I was telling my girlfriend a joke about inflation, but she didn't get it.

It really fell flat.

A balloon seller was selling his balloons.... His sign read DEFLATED BALLONS-$1.... INFLATED BALLOONS-$250

When asked why, he said he'd adjusted the pricing for Inflation.

Apple really is the most futuristic company out there

They have already adjusted their prices for the next 50 years of inflation!

I was at the dollar store and saw balloons labeled $1 a piece. I grabbed 3 and went to the cashier who told me the total was $5.28.

I guess that’s the price of inflation

Why has the cost of balloons risen in the past ten years?

Because of inflation!

Donald Trump says that he plans to reduce inflation.

Shortly after, Tom Brady announced his intent to vote for Trump.

Did anyone hear about that country who started using balloons as currency?

They ended up with a massive inflation problem.

It cost a lot for our rubber dinghy, even back then. Let’s get it ready again!

(Adjusted for inflation)

A man needs to inflate his tyres...

...so he stops at a petrol station, and finds that the air pump needs a token from the petrol station shop in order to work.

The man goes in and asks for one of the tokens.

"That will be 25p" says the cashier, who he pays and gets the token.

The man returns to his car and starts...

I went to the shop to buy a foot pump for our new air bed. I was shocked by how much the price had risen since the last pump I purchased.

But yer, I suppose that’s the cost of inflation.

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The government reveals their new logo today....

The government reveals their new logo today, on a black background sit a magnificent image of a condom.

I guess it makes sense, seeings as how a condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of dicks, and gives you a sense of security while bein...

It used to be free to fill your tires with air now it costs $1.50!

Now that's what you call inflation!

Remember when getting air at a gas station was free? Now they charge you anywhere from a quarter to a dollar!

I guess that's the cost of inflation for you.

Inflation joke

Due to inflation, a picture is now worth only 436 words. Thanks obama.

My friend hired a hot air balloon for his wedding.

They quoted him 200 and on the day charged 400. Said it was due to inflation.

A woman asks a man - "do you drink beer?"

Man: Yeah.

Woman: How many beers a day?

Man: Usually about 3.

Woman: How much do you pay per beer?

Man: $5.00, including the tip.

Woman: And how long have you been drinking?

Man: About 20 years, I suppose.

Woman: So a beer costs $5 and you have 3 beer...

My daughter wanted a bouncy castle for her birthday. The guy said the rental was $50 and the set-up fee was $1000 dollars. I said, “That’s outrageous!”

He just shrugged and said, “That’s inflation for you.”

A time traveler comes back from the year 2045

I encountered a time traveler today. During my self isolation he came to the door dressed in a hazmat suit. I was of course alarmed when I opened the door to such a site. He quickly explained who he was and asked if he could have just a few minutes of my time. I didn't believe anything he was sa...

Do you know why ordering balloons for a party is so expensive?

Inflation.

Why does it cost so much to pump your tyres nowadays?

Inflation.

Why does it cost $2.00 to put air in my tires?

Inflation.

Why are balloons expensive?

Inflation!

I’ll see myself out, unless this blows up.

I asked the guy at the garage why it used to be 10p to put air in my tyres and now it's £1.50.

He just shrugged and said "Inflation".

The wife and I took a long, leisurely drive out to the country and pulled over to fill up our car's gas tank and tires...

She was surprised to see that the station had a fee to fill the tires and asked me, "Why in the world do they charge for AIR?!"

I responded, "Inflation."

I've paid $.25 for a bag of Top Ramen since I was in college

Either they don't raise their prices for inflation or I've been getting ripped off the past 20 years...

Her: They're charging a dollar to pump up your tires now

Me: That's inflation for you

What a dollar can buy

On a visit to see his grandmother, a teen boy listens as she goes on and on about the cost of living.

“When I was a young girl,” she moans, “you could go to the store with a dollar and come home with enough food to feed your family for weeks!”

“Well, Grandma,” the boy replies, “we le...

The price of balloons have not gone up in over 50 years

Which is surprising considering inflation

I remember when it used to cost 25 cents to fill my tires at the gas station. Now it costs $1.25!

Inflation is getting out of hand.

A conversation between a man and a woman

Conversation between a man and a woman. She asks him 5 or 6 questions that he answers quickly and easily. She, however, will remain silent after answering a question asked by the man:

- woman: "Do you drink beer?"

- man: "Yes"

- Woman: "How many beers do you drink a day?"
...

Balloon prices have gone up.

Damn inflation.

A beach ball was $50

So I asked the manager, "Why is this so expensive?"
The manager replied, "Inflation"

A Man Notices His Tires Look a Little Flat

He takes his car to a local gas station with an air pump for the tires. He looks at the price for five minutes of air, and it says "$1.50". He then realizes he left his wallet at home. When he comes back with his wallet, the sign for the air pump says "$20" for five minutes. Baffled, he goes inside ...

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