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Inflation

Three generations of prostitutes are all living in one house. One day the daughter prostitute comes home.

"I just got $40 for a blowjob!" she says.

"Thats ridiculous!" says the mother prostitute, "back in my day I only got $20 dollars for a blowjob!"

The grandmother prostitute p...

Do you remember when air was free at the gas station, and now it's $1.50? You know why?

Inflation


Holy smokes this blew up, THANK YOU all for the awards and the silver!!

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The sex position 69 will now be called 96

This is due to inflation, the cost of eating out increased.

Given inflation...

...when does Nickelback become Dimeback?

inflation

There’s the story of an old lady selling pretzels for 25 cents on a corner in New York. Every day a young man passes her at lunchtime and drops a quarter in the cup but doesn’t take a pretzel. She never says a word. He does this for three years, until one day he drops the quarter in her cup and she ...

My local gas station started charging money just to put air in your tires

When I commented that this had been free for decades, the attendant just looked at me and said "that's inflation for you".

Man, balloons sure are getting expensive…

…I guess that’s inflation for ya.

I bought a balloon for $0.99

How much should I sell it for after I adjust for inflation?

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Inflation

My wife and I like to have economic discussions in the bedroom. After one vigorous discussion about the buying power of the dollar, my wife told me "I'll show you inflation!"

I replied "I've already seen your ass tonight."

Due to inflation a man had to carry a wheelbarrow filled with $1 billion dollars, all in $1 bills

All the banks fail so he has to store his money in a wheelbarrow

He carries the wheelbarrow around town looking for things to buy with his enormous amount of money

He can’t buy anything since even the simplest thing like an apple or a banana cost $2 billion dollars

One day he...

what kink do financial advisors have?

an inflation kink

(thank you, thank you, i did make this one up myself)

I went to the petrol station to pump up the tyres on my car...

So I went to compressor and put 20p in the machine and it didn't work, tries it again and still no joy...

So I walked into the shop and said to guy behind the counter 'Hey man I think your machines broken I keep trying my 20p but it won't turn on...'

He replies to me 'its 50p now that'...

"What is inflation?" asked the CA's wife

"Initially you were 36-24-36, and now you're 48-40-48. So technically, you have more than you had earlier, but your value is less than earlier. THIS IS INFLATION"

Economics is not so difficult if we have the right examples.

Why does Tom Brady hate investing cryptocurrancy

Because it could lead to inflation.

I went to the petrol station to pump up my car tyre...

and the guy charged me 50p. I said “it was only 20p last week”. He said “that’s the price of inflation”

A balloon seller was selling his balloons.... His sign read DEFLATED BALLONS-$1.... INFLATED BALLOONS-$250

When asked why, he said he'd adjusted the pricing for Inflation.

Apple really is the most futuristic company out there

They have already adjusted their prices for the next 50 years of inflation!

A man needs to inflate his tyres...

...so he stops at a petrol station, and finds that the air pump needs a token from the petrol station shop in order to work.

The man goes in and asks for one of the tokens.

"That will be 25p" says the cashier, who he pays and gets the token.

The man returns to his car and starts...

Why has the cost of balloons risen in the past ten years?

Because of inflation!

I was at the dollar store and saw balloons labeled $1 a piece. I grabbed 3 and went to the cashier who told me the total was $5.28.

I guess that’s the price of inflation

Donald Trump says that he plans to reduce inflation.

Shortly after, Tom Brady announced his intent to vote for Trump.

Did anyone hear about that country who started using balloons as currency?

They ended up with a massive inflation problem.

It cost a lot for our rubber dinghy, even back then. Let’s get it ready again!

(Adjusted for inflation)

It used to be free to fill your tires with air now it costs $1.50!

Now that's what you call inflation!

A woman asks a man - "do you drink beer?"

Man: Yeah.

Woman: How many beers a day?

Man: Usually about 3.

Woman: How much do you pay per beer?

Man: $5.00, including the tip.

Woman: And how long have you been drinking?

Man: About 20 years, I suppose.

Woman: So a beer costs $5 and you have 3 beer...

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The government reveals their new logo today....

The government reveals their new logo today, on a black background sit a magnificent image of a condom.

I guess it makes sense, seeings as how a condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of dicks, and gives you a sense of security while bein...

Inflation joke

Due to inflation, a picture is now worth only 436 words. Thanks obama.

I went to the shop to buy a foot pump for our new air bed. I was shocked by how much the price had risen since the last pump I purchased.

But yer, I suppose that’s the cost of inflation.

I remember when I was a kid and air pumps at gas stations were free, now they cost a quarter

Damn inflation

My friend hired a hot air balloon for his wedding.

They quoted him 200 and on the day charged 400. Said it was due to inflation.

My daughter wanted a bouncy castle for her birthday. The guy said the rental was $50 and the set-up fee was $1000 dollars. I said, “That’s outrageous!”

He just shrugged and said, “That’s inflation for you.”

Why does it cost so much to pump your tyres nowadays?

Inflation.

The wife and I took a long, leisurely drive out to the country and pulled over to fill up our car's gas tank and tires...

She was surprised to see that the station had a fee to fill the tires and asked me, "Why in the world do they charge for AIR?!"

I responded, "Inflation."

I've paid $.25 for a bag of Top Ramen since I was in college

Either they don't raise their prices for inflation or I've been getting ripped off the past 20 years...

A time traveler comes back from the year 2045

I encountered a time traveler today. During my self isolation he came to the door dressed in a hazmat suit. I was of course alarmed when I opened the door to such a site. He quickly explained who he was and asked if he could have just a few minutes of my time. I didn't believe anything he was sa...

Why does it cost $2.00 to put air in my tires?

Inflation.

Why are balloons expensive?

Inflation!

I’ll see myself out, unless this blows up.

On a visit to see his grandmother, a teen boy listens as she goes on and on about the cost of living.

“When I was a young girl,” she moans, “you could go to the store with a dollar and come home with enough food to feed your family for weeks!”



“Well, Grandma,” the boy replies, “we learned about that in school recently, and that’s called inflation.”



“Inflation nothing!” ...

I asked the guy at the garage why it used to be 10p to put air in my tyres and now it's £1.50.

He just shrugged and said "Inflation".

Her: They're charging a dollar to pump up your tires now

Me: That's inflation for you

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The Govenment made a recent announcement.....

.......that it is changing the national flag to a CONDOM, because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance.

A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security whilst you're actually...

Balloon prices have gone up.

Damn inflation.

A beach ball was $50

So I asked the manager, "Why is this so expensive?"
The manager replied, "Inflation"

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