Apple really is the most futuristic company out there

They have already adjusted their prices for the next 50 years of inflation!

My friend hired a hot air balloon for his wedding.

They quoted him 200 and on the day charged 400. Said it was due to inflation.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Inflation

Three generations of prostitutes are all living in one house. One day the daughter prostitute comes home.

"I just got $40 for a blowjob!" she says.

"Thats ridiculous!" says the mother prostitute, "back in my day I only got $20 dollars for a blowjob!"

The grandmother prostitute p...

A balloon seller was selling his balloons.... His sign read DEFLATED BALLONS-$1.... INFLATED BALLOONS-$250

When asked why, he said he'd adjusted the pricing for Inflation.

Why is the air pump at gas stations so expensive?

Inflation.



Credit to @foone on the twitters.

The air compressor at the gas station used to be a quarter, now it's a dollar.

That's the cost of inflation.

Why are balloons expensive?

Inflation!

I’ll see myself out, unless this blows up.

Remember, as a child, when air for your bike was free? Now it's $1.50! I asked the gas station attendant why.

He said "inflation"

Why does it cost so much to pump your tyres nowadays?

Inflation.

The price of balloons have not gone up in over 50 years

Which is surprising considering inflation

Remember when air was free? Now it costs $2

Do you know why?


Inflation

Putting air in your tires used to be free now its costs a dollar...

Its called inflation.

I'm waiting to invest in a hot air balloon

I don't want to lose my life's savings to inflation

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The government reveals their new logo today....

The government reveals their new logo today, on a black background sit a magnificent image of a condom.

I guess it makes sense, seeings as how a condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of dicks, and gives you a sense of security while bein...

Keep your money away from any balloons

Otherwise it will be affected by inflation.

I remember when I was a kid and air pumps at gas stations were free, now they cost a quarter

Damn inflation

My daughter wanted a bouncy castle for her birthday. The guy said the rental was $50 and the set-up fee was $1000 dollars. I said, “That’s outrageous!”

He just shrugged and said, “That’s inflation for you.”

"What is inflation?" asked the CA's wife

"Initially you were 36-24-36, and now you're 48-40-48. So technically, you have more than you had earlier, but your value is less than earlier. THIS IS INFLATION"

Economics is not so difficult if we have the right examples.

On a visit to see his grandmother, a teen boy listens as she goes on and on about the cost of living.

“When I was a young girl,” she moans, “you could go to the store with a dollar and come home with enough food to feed your family for weeks!”



“Well, Grandma,” the boy replies, “we learned about that in school recently, and that’s called inflation.”



“Inflation nothing!” ...

A Man Notices His Tires Look a Little Flat

He takes his car to a local gas station with an air pump for the tires. He looks at the price for five minutes of air, and it says "$1.50". He then realizes he left his wallet at home. When he comes back with his wallet, the sign for the air pump says "$20" for five minutes. Baffled, he goes inside ...

I remember when it used to cost 25 cents to fill my tires at the gas station. Now it costs $1.25!

Inflation is getting out of hand.

A woman asks a man - "do you drink beer?"

Man: Yeah.

Woman: How many beers a day?

Man: Usually about 3.

Woman: How much do you pay per beer?

Man: $5.00, including the tip.

Woman: And how long have you been drinking?

Man: About 20 years, I suppose.

Woman: So a beer costs $5 and you have 3 beer...

A beach ball was $50

So I asked the manager, "Why is this so expensive?"
The manager replied, "Inflation"

A man bought a balloon a long time ago and is selling it on eBay. What does he do first?

He adjusts the price for inflation!

I have a conflation fetish.

People often assume I mean an inflation fetish...

And that really gets me going.

Donald Trump says that he plans to reduce inflation.

Shortly after, Tom Brady announced his intent to vote for Trump.

Why does it cost $2.00 to put air in my tires?

Inflation.

I'm outraged at the price of helium balloons.

Bloody inflation.

A man needs to inflate his tyres...

...so he stops at a petrol station, and finds that the air pump needs a token from the petrol station shop in order to work.

The man goes in and asks for one of the tokens.

"That will be 25p" says the cashier, who he pays and gets the token.

The man returns to his car and starts...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One Wish

A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon an unusual old lamp. She picked it up and cleaned it off, and suddenly a Genie appeared. The amazed woman asked if she was going to receive the usual three wishes.

The Genie said, "Nope...due to inflation, constant downsizing, low wag...

Clowns can no longer afford their ballons

because of inflation

Its the bosses birthday at the bank.

Jim is blowing up some BIG balloons.
Sam comes over and notices the size.
"Whoah jim. No need for too much inflation"

When I was a kid a piece of bubble gum used to cost a penny. You know what happened?

Inflation.

What do you call rampant inflation in a prison's microenconomy?

A soap bubble

A conversation between a man and a woman

Conversation between a man and a woman. She asks him 5 or 6 questions that he answers quickly and easily. She, however, will remain silent after answering a question asked by the man:

- woman: "Do you drink beer?"

- man: "Yes"

- Woman: "How many beers do you drink a day?"
...

Balloon prices have gone up.

Damn inflation.

After Harriat Tudman's face gets put on the $20 bill, it will not be valued as much...

...due to inflation you racist.

Why can’t clowns afford balloons anymore?

Because balloon prices are rising due to inflation.

I've paid $.25 for a bag of Top Ramen since I was in college

Either they don't raise their prices for inflation or I've been getting ripped off the past 20 years...

If I bought a balloon for $0.99...

How much should I sell it for when I adjust for inflation?

I live in a bouncy castle.

The rent is high, but that’s just due to inflation.

[At a party]

Dad: " this bouncy castle is twice the price of last year "

Kid: " dad no "

Dad: " that's.. "

Kid: " please no dad "

Dad: " ..inflation for you "

* kids start crying *

I sell balloons for 10p each or if you want them blown up it's 15p.

I've adjusted the price to allow for inflation.

The wife and I took a long, leisurely drive out to the country and pulled over to fill up our car's gas tank and tires. She was surprised to see that the station had a fee to fill the tires and asked me, "Why in the world do they charge for AIR?!"

I responded, "Inflation."

I want to live in a bouncy castle, but...

the price of inflation would be way too big

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Govenment made a recent announcement.....

.......that it is changing the national flag to a CONDOM, because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance.

A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security whilst you're actually...

Got my girlfriend today while airing up a tire

Her- "Why in the world did they start charging for AIR?!"

Me- "Inflation"

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.