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Dilation Jokes

I was about to make a joke about time dilation...

But it would take too long from your perspective.

Your mama is so fat...

If you and I stood ten feet from her and you walked to her then walked back to me I would have aged 20 years due to gravitational time dilation.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman had just gone into labor, and was rushed to the hospital

where she was immediately taken upstairs into the delivery room.

Already at full dilation, the woman screamed "Where the hell is my doctor?!", and at that very moment the doctor walked in, fully scrubbed and ready to go. The doctor lifted the gown, and almost immediately, the baby came. The ...

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