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Drafting Jokes

The military will save money by drafting young adults

And letting them pay for wartime wounds with their own healthcare.

A man walks into a monastery where the monks practice a regimen of strict silence.

Wishing to join their ranks, he agrees to the rules: silence is paramount, and it is forbidden to utter even a single unnecessary word.

After five years of utter silence, the man raises his hand at lunch, signaling for permission to speak. Permission is granted, and he says two words: “I’m co...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man needs a Christmas gift for his new girlfriend. . .

A guy decides to buy his new girlfriend a pair of gloves for Christmas. After all, they’ve only been dating for three weeks so it seems like the ideal gift – romantic, yet not too personal.

He asks the girlfriend’s younger sister to accompany him to buy them then she can point out a pair she’...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There is a little boy who wants a bike..

So he goes and asks his mom for a bike to which she replies that maybe if he prays, god will bring him a bike.

So he sits down and writes Jesus a letter .." Dear jesus, if you give me a bike I wont sin for 1 year.."

He walks down to the mailbox but before leaving the house sees his mot...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

making a will

I was sitting at the computer the other day, drafting my will,
And I called out to my wife,
"WHEN I DIE, I'M GOING TO LEAVE EVERYTHING TO YOU, MY LOVE!"
She shouted back,
"YOU ALREADY DO, YOU LAZY BASTARD!"

A business was looking for office help and puts a sign on the window

The sign reads: "HELP WANTED: We are an equal opportunity employer looking for someone good with computers, Word, Excel and is bilingual"

One day a dog walks up, sees the sign and goes inside. He looks at the receptionist, looks back at the sign and barks.

Figuring out what the dog ca...

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