What do chemists like to watch on YouTube?

Reaction videos.

I randomly encountered a video on YouTube that’s says "How to stop procrasinating”

I thought it was beneficial to me since I am constantly procrastinating, so I saved it to watch later

What is a pirates favorite YouTube genre?

ASM ARRR!!

Why was princess Zelda sad after watching a bunch of YouTube videos?

She couldn't find the link in the description.

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Okay I'm going to reach back in my memory here and pull out an old Buddy Hackett jokes. If you've never heard of him before I'd suggest that you look him up on YouTube. He was in a few movies. The one I remember was was it's a mad mad mad mad world. I might have missed a mad or two on the title.

So I'm walking down the street one day. Minding my own business. When down the middle of the street. To Hurst came by. One following the other. Behind that, there was a man with the biggest dog I've ever seen in my life. And behind that it was like 97 guys, all with their wallet in their hand. So be...

Did you hear the new Spider-Man movie will be Tom Holland’s last?

He said he will continue the story as a YouTube series. It will be a web spin-off.

YouTube disabled the dislike counter.

I would say that everyone disliked that, but I honestly can't tell.

Does anyone else remember seeing the Annoying Orange on YouTube?

I sure do.

He was in the white house for four years.

What’s a YouTuber side job?

Uber.

I thought my home kitchen nuclear experiments YouTube channel would really take off.

But it was just a flash in the pan.

[NSFW] How are US Politicians and Minecraft Youtubers similar?

They both like children

When the human body dies, what's the last part to die?

The pupils. They dilate.

What do you get when YouTubers Rhett & Link pass away?

Good Mythical Mourning

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Lie detector

Little Johnny's dad buys a lie detector that slaps you when you lie because little Johnny has been lying to him lately. When his detector arrives he's gets excited and wants to try it out. Little Johnny is supposed to be in his room doing his homework. So Johnny's dad takes the detector and walks in...

I cant remember who this comedian or how the joke goes 100% but the gist is

So theres this joke i heard when i was young, my mom showed me him on youtube, it was a very deadpan, dry comedian, almost like mitch hedberg, and i cant remember who it was, but the gist of the joke is, "two aliens landed in their spaceship and walked up to me, they were super short, and i asked, h...

Frank Sinatra was dining out one night when a young high school lad came up to his table.

“Mr. Sinatra," said the teen-age boy, “my name is Bernie Rosenberg. Would you please do me a favor?”
“What kind of favor?” Sinatra asked.
Well, I’m here with my girl and I want to make a good impression on her. I certainly would appreciate it if you would drop by my table and say ‘Hi, Be...

I had a dream (true story) that I was watching YouTube videos on how to turn large animals into cars.

Taxidermy.

Name’s Juan

Names Juan. A few years ago I’d been living with my girlfriend in her apartment. I’ve been into video games since I was a kid and never took a real interest in learning practical things like how to hit a nail with a hammer. Girlfriend and I met in college and since graduating and moving in together ...

My brother wanted to get a white noise machine

I told him just to look up Karen videos on YouTube

A Youtuber tried shooting a stun gun at a person.

What happens next WILL shock you.

What do you call a werewolf YouTuber?

A lycansubscribe

A joke I found on the comments section of a youtube video.

When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to...

How do you identify a Christian extremist YouTube video without watching it?

It has 665 likes.

I saw all the people complaining about inappropriate YouTube ads, and at first I thought they were kidding. Then I saw a Trojan condoms ad.

I thought they were horsing around.

Coronavirus has its own YouTube channel now.

Already 8,931,812 followers and counting.

Youtube is introducing a new system of recommending youtube videos

The old system seemed to be biased towards videos of old presidential candidates playing beat and tempo games, so they finally decided to retire the al-gore-rhythm

What do you call a group of reactors?

Youtubers

My dumbass brother made a YouTube video by firing dad's taser at the camera.

What happened next will shock you.

Climate change is causing people to move into hilly and mountainous regions

According to one expert on YouTube it is plain unsettling.

Just saw this on YouTube. Love it

Wanna know why women talk so much and men think so much.
Because women have four lips and men have two heads.

What does YouTube and the US Police have in common?

They take people down before they're proven innocent.

I keep seeing clips from “An Inconvenient Truth” on my YouTube homepage...

Must just be the Al Gore-ithim

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A rich man and a poor man have the same wedding anniversary

so they decide to go shopping at Madison avenue for their wives.

So the poor man asks the rich man "what did you get your wife this year?"

Rich man says " I got her a Huge diamond ring and a brand new Mercedes".

So the poor man asks the rich man "why did you get her both for?"...

I was in the hospital for kidney issues and the urologist told me I needed a cystoscopy. I asked him what the hell that was.

"We are going to YouTube your Peetube."

What is the most popular tree on YouTube?

A face plant

Today I found a Youtube channel about moss

They told me to lichen subscribe

After 8 months of trial and error, hundreds of hours of YouTube, losing money, almost giving up, I can finally say I made my first $100 trading stocks

Never mind, I'm in the red again.

One day YouTube, Twitter, and Facebook will merge...

It'll be called YouTwitFace.

You know what happens when you post a Legend of Zelda song on YouTube...

A copyright strike is imminintendo.

My mom is like a YouTube apology video

She never admits she’s wrong

I don't understand why Youtube demonetized my videos.

It just makes no cents.

I wanted to make a joke criticising YouTube and how ridiculous it's gotten in there

But first, a word from our sponsor RAID: Shadow Legends!

Why was the youtuber so good at handling cows?

Because he was used to milking content.

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Most YouTube ads are only unskippable for 5 seconds, so they try to cram something surprising + the brand name in the first 5 seconds of the ad.

Hence you get ads that are basically Samuel L. Jackson screaming "Capital One, mothafucka!"

What’s a YouTuber’s favorite type of moss?

The lichensubscribe!

*3am going to sleep*

youtube: 3 flips even fat people can learn

On the eve of Joe Biden's inauguration, prominent members of the previous Democrat administrations have a Zoom call to toast the end of the Trump presidency.

Among other topics, conversation turns to Amazon and Google's targeted marketing and the methods they employ. To lighten the mood, Bill Clinton suggests that he and his former vice-president have an impromptu jam session for everyone on saxophone and bongos respectively, something they secretly did ...

I saw a former vice present playing bass recommend to me on Youtube.

I think something was wrong with its Al Gore rhythm.

Rick Astley Walks Into a Bar

I'd tell you what happened but I can't post YouTube links.

A gem from the YouTube comment section

"This watch has tremendous sentimental value to me. My father sold it to me on his deathbed." -Woody Allen

Why can't you tell a Knock Knock joke to a Youtuber?

Cause he'll ask you to subscribe to the bell icon!

“YouTube Red” is a mouthful of a name.

Why not just call it “RedTube”?

Four dads are arguing, each dad claims to have the best son in the world.

The first dad says, "My son is the best because he is so rich, I only gave him a small loan of a million dollars and he ended up making four billion dollars from his multi-billion dollar hotel business. He has even appeared on many TV shows. He is so successful that he was elected to lead a country....

Believe it or not, Satan took a shot at being a YouTuber

His channel got loads views

Too bad he didn't make a penny though

The channel got demonetized

How many youtubers does it take to change a light bulb?

first hit like and subscribe in the upper corner.

What is common between YouTube and our government?

Both break their own laws

I went to a Youtuber's funeral recently but unfortunately the casket fell over...

Best unboxing video ever.

A werewolf stenographer starts a YouTube channel from his post on a U-boat:

Lychan Sub Scribe

I just started a YouTube channel about viruses.

I guess you could say I’m a real influenz-er

What happened to the occultist YouTuber?

His account was demon-itized.

Remember men, no means no, but one thousand no's and one yes

is YouTube Premium's entire marketing scheme.

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First Time Teacher

Day 1 of home schooling


0800  opened school website to get assignments.


0900  found where assignments were hidden on the website.


0915  called school to have the website explained.


0930  called school again.


0945  Had wife call school ...

What did the vertigo afflicted YouTuber say to his subscribers?

Hey, what's up guys!?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Saw this joke on YouTube and originally disliked it, but I eventually came around to it. (I'll change it up a bit, though.)

There's this single dad with three kids. One day, the circus comes to town. The guy says, "Come on, kids. Let's go to the circus."

So they get there, and they sit in the front row. The elephants come out, the jugglers come out, and the clowns come out. One clown says in a funny voice, "Uh, ca...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I have sex I am like a YouTuber...

I strive to reach 10 minutes

My YouTube video with no audio just got taken down.

John Cage gave me a copyright strike.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A joke that’s got me various death threats

So there was a horse, and this horse was really talented. He was great on guitar. One day he found himself watching youtube and stumbled upon a Jimi Hendrix song which inspired him to start a cover. He practised this cover really hard, eventually becoming inspired to create a cover of a whole Jimi H...

What is the wealthy dude who makes bread on YouTube called?

Mr Yeast

Why did the Dragonborn climb the 7000 steps?

He wanted to see what all the Fus was about.

(Credit to a youtube comment i saw)

What does 2020, YouTube’s algorithm, and Reddit’s karma calculator, have in common?

Nobody knows how it really works and is just hoping for the best.

I love Valentines Day. The bottle of wine. The Heart-Shaped Ice Cream Cake...

Taking them home and eating them alone while crying and watching youtube videos.

Good times.

What does Jeffery Epstein and me being offered 30 days of YouTube premium have in common?

We both skip the trial.

YouTubers love "The Legend of Zelda"...

There's almost always a Link in the description.

I've uploaded all my Satan-worshipping sessions to youtube

You can guess they've all been demonetized.

You know, youtube improving the lives of creators and vaccines causing autism have at least on thing in common

Neither actually happen

When do Youtubers know it’s time to retire?

When they get 401k likes

None if the nail art tutorials on youtube are good

All the thumbnails look trashy.

Why are people praising Netflix and Youtube for promising to reduce video quality during the pandemic?

Reddit has been doing it for years already.

I made a YouTube video about the violence I endured as a writer on board a U-boat

Just hit subscribe.

Wanna hear a joke?

YouTube premium

Vote for Gaben for president.

There will be no World War 3.


(stolen from a 4 year old comment on a portal 2 e3 2010 YouTube video).

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

YouTube rewind 2019

That's it, the whole fucking joke

Did you see the new youtube channel that's non stop footage of gorillas opening bananas?

It's super ape peeling.

What is a youtuber’s favorite line?

Leave it in the comments down below.

What happened when Dracula uploaded illegal content to YouTube?

A count suspended.

I think that YouTubers have to be put in jail

I mean, seriously, why would you hit 1 million of your followers?

A teacher asks her class,

"If there are 14 birds on the fence and you shoot 2 of them off. How many are left?"

One little boy says, "None, because the shotgun scared them all off."

The teacher says, "that's not the answer I was looking for, but I like the way you think."

The boy then asks the teacher, "...

A Sliced Dairy Product

There was once a man named Ani. Ani was a long-time comedian. He had been running both a YouTube and a Twitter account for an entire decade, and did stand-up in bars and comedy clubs. Everywhere he went, he was showered with praise for his originality and dedication. On one 17th of August, however, ...

If you have a child, you can name them “one million subscribers on YouTube”

Then you can tell people you hit one million subscribers on YouTube

How did the virus introduce itself?

Hi, I'm an influenza, check out my YouTube page!

I blasted the Soviet Union anthem in my private school

It's now a public school







Credit to a YouTube comment

LPT: Forgot the name of a song but know the tune?

Just upload a video of you humming it onto YouTube and you'll immediately get a copyright claim stating the name of the song!

*Doing a stand up gig for a charity for people in wheelchairs*

Opening line - "If this was a YouTube video the comments would be disabled"

Lemonade and iced tea make an Arnold Palmer. What do you get when you Mix Lemonade with a tea bag?

Benedict Arnold Palmer

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Choosing a new password: potato

Choosing a new password: potato

\-Sorry, password must contain at least 8 letters.

boiled potato

\-Sorry, password must contain at least one number.

1 boiled potato

\-Sorry, password cannot contain spaces

50fuckingboiledpotatoes

\-Sorry...

What do you call a YouTuber who's really satisfied with life?

A content creator

I wish Youtube would only allow videos in 1080p or higher from next year on

That would be a nice New Year's resolution.

How to fake your own death

Become a famous YouTuber and stop uploading for months.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

what the most useless thing ever?

a dislike button on a youtube comment

How is my mother-in-law similar to an anti-vaxx video on Youtube?

They both have a lot of negative comments.

You tube

Police say their investigation into the shooting at the YouTube headquarters has been hampered by having to sit through a 5 second advert before interviewing each witness

How do youtubers get in swimming pools?

They just *jump into it*

David and Shane worked for a small furniture company which had recently developed a new product.

They had been developing a new kind of smart shelf, and it was finally finished. This shelf had everything! Part of it featured a built in wireless charger, there were USB ports, part of it could flip up to reveal a screen which could be used as digital picture frame as well as had access to YouTube...

Why will the Moon replace YouTube

It has lots of big craters

This joke brought to you by my girlfriend, you wouldn't know her, she goes to a different school .

When YouTube keeps recommending Iron Man videos after you seen Endgame

“Everywhere I go, I see his face”

As I watched an ongoing fued between two YouTube makeup influencers I couldnt help but wonder...

Was this because their relationship was based on a bad foundation?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

You stole my viola, cello, and double bass.

You made me so angry, I'm violint now.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Shane Dawson Joke

Shane Dawson's latest vlog had him reflecting his Youtube career, he stated "You do one song, nobody calls you a singer. You make one movie, nobody calls you a filmmaker. You write one book, nobody calls you an author. But you fuck one cat....."

A guy walks into a bar and takes out a tiny piano

This guy walks into a bar and takes out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist.




He sets the tiny piano down at the bar, and the tiny pianist starts playing up a storm. The bartender looks at the man and says, "That's amazing, where did you get that?" The man replies, "There's a genie ...

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