UPJOKE
capodiddonneddonningjuannotrostovweargiovannigrandeeshallsportthatthesethink

C'mon guys don't make fun of Amber Heard's lawyer

He probably gets enough abuse from her as it is

Don't make fun of fat people with lisps...

They're thick and tired of it

Do you know why I don't make fat jokes?

Because they wouldn't be appreciated by the wider audience.

Two wrongs don't make a right...

...but two Wrights made a plane

Please don't make any more jokes about the Coronavirus...

My friend has it and it's serious. He got it from a tick bite...

It's the first reported case of Corona with Lyme.

Don't make a decision before you have studied all its aspects ! Don't make a decision when you are angry !

An iron company manager, while touring the company noticed a young man leaning against the wall and doing nothing.

He approached him and said softly, "How much is your salary?"

The young man was calm and surprised by the personal question.

He answered, "2500 dollars a month, sir...

Don't make me angry

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Don't make me angry," he says. "You won't like me when I'm angry because I back up my rage with facts and documented sources." "Ah," the bartender says. "So you're the credible hulk."

Don't make fun of obesity

It's too big of a matter to be taken lightly.

A plumber fixes a damaged pipe in a doctor's house and asks for 200 dollars. Doctor says to him: "Even i, don't make so much money in such a short period and i'm a doctor".

And the plumber goes: "I know sir. I used to be a doctor myself"

Why jokes about Finland don't make sense?

It starts with 'a finnish'

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The reason why I don't make blowjob jokes

Is because they suck

Two rights don't make a wrong...

The third Reich makes it wrong.

They make wrist watches, and pocket watches. I finally figured out why they don't make belt buckle watches:

It's a waist of time.

I don't make passive aggressive posts on Reddit

Unlike **SOME** people.

Don't make fun of Kim Jong Un just because of his condition.

It's not his fault he suffers from projectile dysfunction.

Rabbis don't make a lot of money during circumcisions

At least they get to keep the tips

There's a reason people don't make jokes about the Jonestown massacre!

The punch line is too long.

I don't make mistakes twice

I repeat them five or six times just to make sure.

People always tell me my rhymes don't make sense.

And they're absolutely right. Pretense.

Don't make jokes about Mexicans.

Thats crossing the border.

Bob Ross said "We don't make mistakes. We just have happy accidents."

So, either he lied and my parents made a mistake or I'm an accident.

Two wrongs don't make a right...

...For example, your parents.

(Saw this spray painted on the back of a van. No idea if it's from something)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Don't make a sound...

3 men were exploring some deep jungles when they came across a cannibal tribe. The 3 men were taken to the cannibal chief. After some begging and pleading by the 3 men, the cannibal chief decides to show some mercy. He says "You 3 men go out into the jungle. You come back with 10pcs of fruit each. T...

What happens when you don't make the summer Olympics?

You luge.

There's a guy threatening to kill me if I don't make a bread joke.

I'm toast.

I don't make friends with people wearing eyepatches.

Friendship has two 'i's.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What kind of bees don't make a buzzing noise?

Boobies.

Please don't make fun of the Holocaust

My grandfather died by falling off the guard tower

They don't make forks like they used to.

Modern plastic ware makes me miss the good old tines.

I'm just now realizing most blink-182 lyrics don't make any sense

I guess this is growing up...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

People don't make a big deal about elevators, but they are really ahead of their time...

It's some next level shit.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My joke was removed for comparing Trump to Hitler

Apparently it's against the rules to make personal attacks on someone even after they've been dead for over 70 years.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.