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Deli Meat Jokes

My uncle got addicted to deli meat

But I heard he quit cold turkey.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm addicted to deli meats

The worst part is my therapist keeps recommending cold turkey

I've got a terrible addiction, I can't stop eating deli meats.

I'm trying to quit cold turkey.

My family is getting worried about my consumption of deli meats, and I'm not sure what to do...

They're trying to pressure me into quitting cold turkey!

A man is getting some deli meat...

And he asks the clerk: "How long does turkey last?"
The clerk replies: "oh about 5 days or so."
Man:"Really?! That doesn't sound right, I think it's closer to 2 weeks!
Clerk:"Oh no that's a bunch of bologna"

On my cake day, I went to the Doctor and was told that my love of deli meats was going to kill me.

I had to quit cold turkey.

I’ve decided to put an end to my addiction to deli meats.

I’m quitting cold turkey.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If a woman ever pulls a knife out on you during an argument....

....pull out some bread, deli meat and cheese. Her instincts will kick in and she'll make you a sandwich.

A guy's working as a cashier at Best Buy

He finds his job a little dull, but from where he's stationed he can see out to store entrance to the parking lot (and more importantly, the sky) outside. He spends a lot of time looking out the store entrance and daydreaming, but one day he notices a blond woman walk up to the store with a bunch of...

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