UPJOKE
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A guy enters a bar carrying an alligator and loudly announces, “I’ll place my genitals inside this alligator’s mouth…

…the gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I’ll remove my unit unscathed,” he says.

Now, he has the full attention of the bar!

Here’s the deal, he continues, “If this works, everyone buys me drinks.” There is a murmur among the patrons, and after a moment, they a...

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A guy runs into the sperm bank with a mask and a gun...

"Hands up, lady!" he yells.

The woman behind the counter puts up her hands. "Sir! This isn't a real bank! It's a sperm bank!"

"Never mind that! Just open the vault! Now!"

So she does.

"Get in there! Grab one of them vials!" he says, waving the gun at her.

"But the...

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This is a joke from Norway that I've heard, as a Finn I absolutely love it.

A long time ago, there was a man named Toivonen, he had turned 18 and had to face a test about his manhood.

He got 3 challenges:
1. He must drink a bottle of hard booze in one sitting without cringing, flinching, or without a reaction in any way
2. He must shake hands with a live b...

Man goes to a doctor

A man goes to the doctor and says "doctor, I have pain all over my body, everywhere I touch hurt". He then proceeds to point to various parts of his body cringing in pain. The doctor gives him a thorough examination and concludes. "Sir, it appears you have a broken finger".

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Phil Smith’s Scrotum

Suzie Smith stood up and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Phil, was in a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."

A muffled gasp arose from the men...

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Three men are trapped on an island inhabited by cannibals.

Soon enough they get caught. the leader tells them to go out into the woods and pick ten of any fruit they find then come back. The first man comes back with ten apples. The leader says to him "If you can stick all ten apples up your ass without making and sound or facial expression then you will be...

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