UPJOKE
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Did you know that the Netherlands imports all oatmeal to avoid copyright laws?

Because if they produced locally they would be making Holland Oats.

I dressed up as Spider-Man in my last video and I got 2 copyright strikes!

One from Marvel and one from Fleshlight.

My friend and I were talking about pirated movie in China

Friend: I can watch a whole movie on Bilbili

Me: There are basically no Copyright in China, because the people there have no right.

Friend: So they left with copy. And they think copy is right

I was going to make a social media platform called "Please Try Again Later",

but I figured Reddit would sue me for copyright violation.

Why don't Elton John songs have a copyright?

You can tell everybody this is your song.

Copyright?

Copy write.

I saw an anti-abortion meme and wondered about copyright law ...

Does the image come with reproduction rights?

The original red shirt story

There's this mighty sailing ship, a British frigate, cruising the Seven Seas, and one day the lookout shouts down from the crow's nest, "Captain! Captain! There's two pirate ships heading our way! They mean to attack! What should we do?"

And the captain, he says, "Bring me my red shirt."<...

What's a pirate's least favourite letter?

Dear Sir,

We’re writing to you because you’ve violated copyright ...

What do you call a silly burrowing creature who hates copyright?

Crash bandicam

Activists Sued for Copyright Violation after portraying Trump as Jafar in Aladdin Stage Show.

Judge says Pantomime to Tyrancy was Tantamount to Piracy.

I was browsing Netflix the other day, and Happened upon the Amy Schumer special "Inside Amy Schumer." Looks like they couldn't use the original title idea due to copyright issues:

'Wide Open Spaces'

What does Meghan Trainor say when she’s sued for copyright infringement?

Now I’m in treble

Why did the element Fluorine get a copyright strike?

Because it was extremely reactive

Important copyright notice

Remember, if you sing "Happy Birthday" to the Queen, it is still *not* royalty-free.

TIL U2 got sued over copyright and didn't have money to afford a lawyer. The ACLU stepped in for free and they won the case.

It was pro Bono.

The government will send a martial artist after you if you violate copyright law

IP Man

What's a pirate's LEAST favorite letter?

Dear Customer,



Your internet service has been terminated due to copyright infringement.

Argon walks into a bar

The bartender looks up and says, "I'm sorry, we don't serve noble gases here."

Argon doesn't react because reacting has been copyrighted by The Fine Bros since 2016.

You know what happens when you post a Legend of Zelda song on YouTube...

A copyright strike is imminintendo.

What's a pirate's least favorite letter?

Comcast has received a notification by a copyright owner, or its authorized agent, reporting an alleged infringement of one or more copyrighted works made on or over Comcast's High-Speed Internet service (the 'Service'). The copyright owner has identified the Internet Protocol ('IP') address associa...

I invented a new word.

Plagiarism.

---

EDIT : This joke was invented by me and copyrighted. Dare to take it and a lawsuit shall find you.

Roses are Red, Reposters are lame

[This post has been removed due to a copyright claim.]

Sam was a man with big dreams who lived in a small countryside village

One day, sam decided to follow his dreams and went to the big city. "Now you gotta find a job, Sam" he said to himself, and went to search for one.

After being rejected from several job interviews, Sam returns defeated to his home, there, he decides not to give up. With some money from his pa...

I’d make a joke about Article 13, but...

*This post has been removed under breach of the EU Copyright Legislation.*

Club manager: Your last joke was so bad it put the audience to sleep. What do you plan to do about it?

Comedian: Copyright it and sell it as a cure for insomnia.

What's the difference between a Halfing and a Hobbit?

Copyright

What letter do pirate's hate the most?

Dear Charter Internet Customer:

Charter Communications ("Charter") has been notified by a copyright owner, or its authorized agent, that your Internet account may have been involved in the exchange of unauthorized copies of copyrighted material (e.g., music, movies, or software). We are a...

My YouTube video with no audio just got taken down.

John Cage gave me a copyright strike.

My teacher said “we have the ability to clone we just don’t know what kind of rights they should have.”

I simply replied “copyright”

LPT: Forgot the name of a song but know the tune?

Just upload a video of you humming it onto YouTube and you'll immediately get a copyright claim stating the name of the song!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's a Pirate's least favorite letter?

A copyright infringement notice.

There’s a reason why China has so many fake items

And the reason is because the Chinese have mistaken ‘Copyright’ for ‘Copy Is Right’

Why did Hulk Hogan and Donkey Kong meet at the same time?

They were both in court for copyright claims filed against them.

Did you hear about the woman who backed up into a fan?

Disaster.
Dis-assed-her.

Copyright Chris Farley.

Why did the guitarist get arrested?

Copyright infringement

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An amateur band was recording a new album in the studio...

...and decided to record a cover of another less known artist, a judge who mostly played small private events like weddings.

The album became a huge hit, and sales went through the roof. However, the judge also happened to come across the album after its release. The judge contacted their man...

I was walking down the street with my wife...

... when I saw my mother-in-law being beaten up by six men.

My wife said, "Aren't you going to help?"

I said, "Six should be enough."

*(Copyright Les Dawson, as retold by Jimmy Carr on QI.)*

If a tree falls in the woods

It won't make a sound because it has been copyright claimed by Warner Music Group.

I never tell jokes that I didn't come up with myself.

That'd make me a copyright?

A young kid from the inner city only ever dreamed of being a dancer

Lacey worked really hard and started to gain some attention until a tragic accident destroyed her left knee. She lost her job at the dance company and thus her insurance, leaving her with a shattered knee and broken dreams.

Then she saw a commercial for these brand new knee replacements, Mah...

I found an addictive game at an arcade.

It's a version of whack-a-mole, except to avoid any copyright issues, you try to whack baby goats. It might sound lame, but I was getting the hang of it and I had almost beaten the high score.

It was already late, and I didn't notice the time passing by. By the time I had actually gotten the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

They asked Stephen King to write a horror story about a gorilla...

He told his publishers that he wanted to write it under his *nom de plume* "Richard Bachman." The problem, he said, was that he'd already written "The Monkey" under his own name. He didn't want people to think this new story was a sequel, or derivative in some way. Legally, since he'd sold the ri...

What organ in the body never dies?

THE LIVER.

ometrist will copyright this joke. hopefully.

The Difference Between Starkiller Base and The Death Star

Starkiller base doesn't have a reactor core because it is a copyright of the fine bros.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A time traveler meets with an ancient Jewish Bibical author.

After a brief introduction, having convinced the scribe of his identity, the time-traveler launches into an excited speech:

"Rabbi, do you know that in the future, your writings will spawn off other religions that in turn would make most of the world's population adherents of the Abrahamic fa...

Want to hear a joke?

Youtube's Copyright System

mrw browsing front page

[removed due to copyright]

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