Consists Jokes - 43 Hilarious Consists Jokes

There's a far-off place that consists of a perfectly triangular

lake surrounded by land, with three kingdoms on the three sides of the lake. The first kingdom is rich and powerful, filled with wealthy, prosperous people. The second kingdom is more humble, but has its fair share of wealth and power too. The third kingdom is struggling and poor and barely has an a...

What do call a Hip Hop group that consists of furries?

The Uwu-Tang Clan.

What superhero consists of only 16 atoms?

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BATMAN!!

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What genre consists of erotic novels?

Cliterature

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A man walks in a bar and sees a jar full of 100$ bills

A man walks in a bar and sees a jar full of $100 bills, so he asks the bartender why there is so much money in the jar.

The bartender replies that it is a bet and you have to pay $100 to partecipate. The bet consists in three tests:

The first test: You see that man sitting back there? ...

Sometimes I feel like my life basically consists of fighting a battle, a battle with no use in the end.

Then I go on /r/Ghostbusters and feel better about myself.

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Three American colonels are in the US about to retire and they are offered an economic compensation...

..which consists of multiplying 100,000 dollars by the distance in inches they have between two parts of their body that they choose.

Colonel McDowell chooses this distance to be from his toe to the edge of his longest hair on his head and the result is 72 inches, so that means he gets $7,20...

A man buys a paint factory in a small town.

He visits the local volunteer fire department to see for himself if they'd be able to handle a fire at his plant. What he finds convinces him they could not...the whole fire department consists of one old pumper truck and a bunch of volunteers he finds less than reliable. He tells them "Boys, I'm so...

A joke for all the old geezers.....

A doctor is sent to a nursing home to test the minds and memories of the residents. To save time, she interviews them in groups of three. The first group she meets with consists of three men.
Turning to the first one, she asks, “What’s nine times thirteen?”
“That would be four hundred and si...

In 1973, the Six Million Dollar Man consisted of a bionic man with super powers...

In 2016, the Six Million Dollar Man consists of two hip replacements.

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Smart Boy

In a Store a man asked for 1/2 packet of butter.

The salesperson, a young boy, said that only full packs were available in the Store,

but the man insisted on buying only 1/2.

So the boy went inside to the manager’s room and said “An idiot outside wants to buy only 1/2 pack of bu...

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Kate Upton & Kate Middleton compete in a popularity contest

Kate Upton goes first, she gets up on stage and undoes her blouse and starts shaking her tits up, down, and in all directions, the audience which consists of mostly men start cheering and going crazy, Kate Middleton then gets up on stage, sets a chair up, takes a seat and starts douching, the audien...

Another blonde joke

A blonde reports for her university final exam. The exam consists mainly of true or false questions.

She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin. Sh...

The principle difference's between Murphy's law and Cole's law

Murphy's law postulates that whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.

Cole's law primarily consists of thinly shredded cabbage, carrot and mayonnaise.

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A guy walks into a bar without money…

He asks the bartender if he can get a free drink. The bartender kindly replies there are no free drinks on offer, but he could actually try the challenge and win free drinks for the rest of his life…

Naturally, the guy is interested; ‘So tell me about that challenge!’

The bartender exp...

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Did you hear that KFC is serving a Taylor Swift special?

It consists of two long skinny legs, two small breasts, and a left wing.

I just made a playlist for hiking

It consists of Peanuts, Eminem, California Raisins and The Cranberries. I call it my Trail Mix.

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So, theres a manliest of the men competition where hundreds of men compete to find out who is the strongest.

The competition consists of three stages first being a pit that leads into a sea where hungry sharks are everywhere. After that there is a mossy swamp filled with alligators. Finally a jungle where tons upon tons of lions are. After a day goes by and no one is able to complete this competition the a...

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An angel appeared before a conference of philosophers.

Everyone was shocked, especially considering many of them were atheists. At once, a debate raged about what to ask this supernatural entity.

Seeing the commotion, in a booming voice, the angel said, "I will return in one hour, at which time I will answer any one question with 100% certainty....

Punishing kids now days...

Punishing kids now days consists of taking away all of their technology and making them experience life the way you grew up.

Great white shark diet surprises scientists

"It consists mostly of wildlife biologists that study sharks," said a famous wildife biologist studying sharks.

Young Arnold Schwarzenegger is selected to play a horse in his school play with another kid

The costume consists of two parts. The front part and the rear.

So the kid says: "Ok Arnold, I'll be the front."

So Arnold agrees and says: "I'll be back."

There's all this talk about the lack of women in STEM, but it's always been surprising how no one bats an eye at USPS.

After all, their workforce consists entirely of mail trucks.

german, the language of poets and thinkers

german, the language of poets and thinkers.
also german:

A: we need some new words for all this stuff.

B: okay, what's the first one doing?

A: it's a vehicle that flies.

B: okay. flyingstuff.

A: wow, awesome! okay, the next one is a vehicle that drives.

B...

President Trump‘s personal library burned down

Reality has always been radiating dreamweavers whose lives are opened by divinity. We are in the midst of an ancient condensing of nature that will enable us to access the infinite itself. Throughout history, humans have been interacting with the biosphere via meridians.

Although you may not ...

Once upon a time in a far away land...

There's a triangular lake, with three kingdoms on each side of the triangle.

The first kingdom is very rich, and the people are content. It has a very competent army, with a squire for every knight, and a total of twenty thousand knights. There is no hunger in the land.

The second kin...

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A Mexican, a Spaniard and an American are all travelling in a plane

When suddenly, the plane crashed onto a small island. The three emerged from the crash remains and noticed they're the only survivors.

They quickly organized and started gathering materials to survive when suddenly, a group of native cannibals surrounded them with spears and took them to the...

If Timmy buys 7 apples and eats 5

what is the median velocity of his motorcycle?

A russian village has a tradition...

...where each year they they hold a very unusal contest, that consists of 4 challenges: First, the contestants must down a bottle of vodka, then they must swim across an icy lake, third they must shake hands with a chained up wild bear on the other side, and finally they have to run to the closest v...

A proctologist quits his job...

A proctologist named Bill decides he is tired of practicing medicine and quits his job to pursue his dream of being a car mechanic. He enrolls in a trade school and after some time the final exam is given. The test solely consists of disassembling and reassembling a car engine. The teacher tells the...

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The inmates of an asylum are playing a game called "ripe mango"

It consists of the inmates climbing a tree in the facility and yelling "ripe mango", before letting go and falling to the ground. The director of the asylum passes by and chuckes and one of the inmates calls him to play.

The director, just to indulge them, climbs the tree but yells "unripe m...

I'm serving a new drink at my restaurant called "The Trump Presidency"...

It consists of a tall glass of Bitters with an aspirin dropped in.

It'll be a huge hit. Half the people will order it. The other half will be given it whether they like it or not!

A man and his smart aleck child went camping

They set up their tent, and after a long day, they prepared to go to bed

As they lay down on their sleeping bag, the father asked his son: “What do you see?”

The son replied: “I see the big dipper that consists of the seven stars of the Ursa Major, I see the constellation of Cancer, wh...

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General Custer's Wife

So General Custer's wife goes to an artist and asks the man to draw her husband's finally words.

A few days later, she returns to the artist. The painting he's made consists of several piles of manure that have halos, and a group of Native Americans that appear to be having sex.

Irate,...

So a man gets back from a holiday.

and he's showing his family a photo album. He gets to one picture and says, look this is a little monkey called a macaque, and it's diet consists mostly of crabs. His family is somewhat impressed and enjoy the cute picture.
The man then says "Well if you liked that, you'll love these!" turns the ...

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A teacher gives her students of second grade a task

to learn about a topic from a given list (which goes: food, water, cows, airplanes etc) and then present it in class the following
day. One of those students, went home and decided that he could present on the topic of cows, and learns some lines..
“A cow is an animal. It has 4 legs, one mout...

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A man and woman get married

The next day they're talking to the neighbor. "So, who'd you put on your list?" The neighbor asked. Confused, the wife says "what list?" "Oh you know, the list of who you can still have sex with if ever given the opportunity, mine consists of Raquel Welch and Marilyn Monroe." Intrigued, the wife...

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The Brit, the Frenchman, the Gangster and the Tribals

One day, a trio of adventurers are making their way through the Amazon. The group consists of a die-hard Brit, a die-hard Frenchman and a recent addition to the team, a gangster from downtown Chicago. Eventually, the party is caught by a group of tribals and put in a cage. The chief of the tribals a...

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Kim Yong Il, Stalin and Hitler have their personal hell...

...which consists of a swamp that will let you sink deeper the more lies you spread during your time as a leader.

Kim Yong Il is buried till his waist.

Stalin is buried till his chest.

Hitler is standing upright above them all, barely sunken in till his ankles with a big grin on...

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[LONG] A joke my uncle told me the other day

A helicopter pilot takes his grandfather along with him on the helicopter and decides to do some stunts in the air.

 

The first stunt involves flying rapidly towards a mountain and dodging it just in time. After that, the grandfather says: "I expected this."

 <...

Fun Facts about ants

So as you may or may not know, ants have many breeds, but above these breeds, two general groups can be seen in ants around the world. These groups are the Macro ants (Big ants), and the Micro ants (Small ants).

Multiple different breeds of ants can be found in each of the two groups (Such ...

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The Bar Challenge

A man walks into a bar....

Upon sitting down, he notices a sizeable jar behind the bar, full to the brim with $50 notes.

He says to the barmaid: “What’s with all the cash in the jar?”

The barmaid replies: “It’s for our bar challenge, which consists of three different tasks”. Y...

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A little girl lives next to a fire house...

She admires the fire fighters so much she makes her own firetruck. It consists of her wagon, with the team of her cat in front with a string tied to his testicles, and her dog which lacks the testicular string, however has a harness and reins for her to lead him with. The firefighters see it, and ha...

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