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Initially I was proud of my participation in a trial for cloning humans...

...but now, I don't think I can live with myself.

To those who don't understand cloning...

It makes two of us.

A cloning experiment gone wrong

A laboratory, hidden from public knowledge, secretly worked on the cloning of humans. Of course, human cloning being illegal, their staff was limited to a select few that had both the credentials and the disregard for rules that was considered essential to be a successful researcher at the facility....

Cloning ethics question.

Cloning yourself and pushing your clone off a cliff to its death is probably a crime, but what crime is it?

Is it murder?

Suicide?

Or making an obscene clone fall?

I quit my job to start a cloning business and it's been great,

I love being my own boss.

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Cloning

A rich assholish guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "I've decided that I'm going to have myself cloned," he smugly tells the bartender. "Well," the bartender replies. "Wouldn't that be just like you...."

If I don’t perfect Human Cloning...

...I won’t be able to live with myself

My friends job involves cloning the DNA of trains.

But I just call him a genetic engineer.

Stop Cloning Around

A mad scientist managed to clone himself, but something went wrong. His clone would repeatedly stick his head out the fourth-story window, and curse at people below. The scientist was at a loss, and deeply embarrassed by his clone's behavior. After two weeks of pleading and threatening his clone, th...

Ive opened a deer cloning service

Its for anyone hoping to make a quick buck

A father and a son were talking about the possibility of cloning each other. The son says, “Umm, I don’t know about that. I don’t really fully understand what it does.” The father looks at him and says..

“Well son, that makes two of us.”

Gustavo was a mad scientist

Gustavo, called “Gus” by his friends and nemeses, was a mad scientist with very peculiar tastes. In particular, he was fond of the flavor of human flesh.

However, he was an ethical mad scientist, so he got his meat via cloning willing subjects.

Over time the number of subjects went dow...

I was double majoring in cloning and hide-and-seek

But I had to take a year off to find myself.

Now that Bob's retired from the cloning lab...

he doesn't know what to do with himself.

Just thought up this one: How did the cloning subject feel?

Beside himself.

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Therapist: You are addicted to using the cloning machine

Us: No we aren’t

ELI5: Is human cloning possible?

SCIENTIST: Eli, I have 4 people I’d like you to meet...

What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?

I feel like a Million Bucks!!!

There are many already outstanding reasons not to leave one's automated cloning machine out in the forest...

...but the obvious bears repeating.

The man that invented human cloning has died .

The mourners will probably be beside themselves at the funeral.

Scientists are studying cloning technology and are finally ready to put it to the test.

They insert DNA from a test subject into the machine and wait as the cloning device does it's thing.

After it's done all it managed to produce was a head, an alive and conscious head.

Scientists quickly scramble to put the head in a jar of salient. Where he remained for about a week....

I hear North Korea is coming out with some new cloning technology...

I can't wait to meet Kim Jong-deux.

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They had to shut down the T-Rex cloning program at the Oedipus Complex.

It was on the news this morning. Apparently, the entire staff was eaten by mother-fucking dinosaurs.

If cloning ever becomes real, I want 3 triceratops.

I even already have names for them. Oneceratops, Twoceratops, and Jeff.

When I finally worked out the secret to cloning...

...I was beside myself.

I finally finished working on my cloning machine and I can't believe it worked.

I mean, I was really beside myself.

I wanted to be the first person to invent a feline cloning machine...

But everybody said it was nothing but a copycat invention.

Did you hear about the man who spent his whole life trying to perfect cloning technology?

When it finally happened, he was beside himself.

A scientist finally found a way to clone humans by first cloning himself.

Physically the clone was a perfect match, however it had mental problems. All day long it would curse and shout vulgarities and insults ad nauseum. At first it was interesting but as time went on the behavior worsened. Day in and day out he would spew an endless stream of obscenity that could mak...

Why were the two Chinese scientists having trouble cloning a caucasian?

Because two Wongs can't make a white.

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Boyfriend moving in...

Him: Can I set up a cloning machine in the basement?

Me: Sure, make yourself at home.

I was thrown out of my cloning exam

for copying the kid next to me.

An eccentric professor brings a cloning machine into class to illustrate a difficult concept...

One student, gesturing to the demonstration, decides to reach out to his overachieving friend.
"I just don't understand what that thing does."
His friend, clearly bothered by the situation, snaps back, "that makes two of us!"

Bill Nye cloned himself with the help of Neil deGrasse Tyson.

Unfortunately, something went wrong in the cloning process and resulted in the clone being pure evil. As soon as he was released from the cloning vat, the evil clone killed the good Bill Nye and escaped. Much later, after hunting him for years, Neil deGrasse Tyson finally caught up with the evil clo...

Han Solo is chilling in his room when suddenly the light goes out.

He tries to fix the bulb, but after an hour of laborious effort, he gives up.

He heads over to Yoda's place to see if he can help. As Yoda opens the door, he spots a huge machine with flashing lights, beeping in the middle of the room.

"What's this?" he asks Yoda.

"A cloning m...

I remember when my cloning project failed.

A part of me died that day.

Did you hear about the scientist who accidentally tripped into his cloning machine?

He was really beside himself after that one.

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