Cloning Jokes

...I won’t be able to live with myself

A mad scientist managed to clone himself, but something went wrong. His clone would repeatedly stick his head out the fourth-story window, and curse at people below. The scientist was at a loss, and deeply embarrassed by his clone's behavior. After two weeks of pleading and threatening his clone, th... read more

But I just call him a genetic engineer.

I love being my own boss.

Cloning yourself and pushing your clone off a cliff to its death is probably a crime, but what crime is it?

Is it murder?

Suicide?

Or making an obscene clone fall?

Its for anyone hoping to make a quick buck

I told him, "That makes two of us".

A laboratory, hidden from public knowledge, secretly worked on the cloning of humans. Of course, human cloning being illegal, their staff was limited to a select few that had both the credentials and the disregard for rules that was considered essential to be a successful researcher at the facility.... read more

SCIENTIST: Eli, I have 4 people I’d like you to meet...

But I had to take a year off to find myself.

The mourners will probably be beside themselves at the funeral.

His friend replies, "Well that makes two of us."

Geneticist Rick Hallorann spoke to the crowds of reporters, camera flashes illuminating his face.

"The time has finally come for the first human cloning experiment to be performed," he began. "The technology for us to clone humans has been around since the eighties - but only now, after plent... read more

he doesn't know what to do with himself.

Beside himself.

I'd be beside myself

I feel like a Million Bucks!!!

I even already have names for them. Oneceratops, Twoceratops, and Jeff.

...I was beside myself.

for copying the kid next to me.

A part of me died that day.

I can't wait to meet Kim Jong-deux.

...but the obvious bears repeating.

Physically the clone was a perfect match, however it had mental problems. All day long it would curse and shout vulgarities and insults ad nauseum. At first it was interesting but as time went on the behavior worsened. Day in and day out he would spew an endless stream of obscenity that could mak... read more

I mean, I was really beside myself.

He tries to fix the bulb, but after an hour of laborious effort, he gives up.

He heads over to Yoda's place to see if he can help. As Yoda opens the door, he spots a huge machine with flashing lights, beeping in the middle of the room.

"What's this?" he asks Yoda.

"A cloning m... read more

Because two Wongs can't make a white.

But everybody said it was nothing but a copycat invention.

When it finally happened, he was beside himself.

One student, gesturing to the demonstration, decides to reach out to his overachieving friend.
"I just don't understand what that thing does."
His friend, clearly bothered by the situation, snaps back, "that makes two of us!"

He was really beside himself after that one.

Unfortunately, something went wrong in the cloning process and resulted in the clone being pure evil. As soon as he was released from the cloning vat, the evil clone killed the good Bill Nye and escaped. Much later, after hunting him for years, Neil deGrasse Tyson finally caught up with the evil clo... read more

“Well son, that makes two of us.”

Gustavo, called “Gus” by his friends and nemeses, was a mad scientist with very peculiar tastes. In particular, he was fond of the flavor of human flesh.

However, he was an ethical mad scientist, so he got his meat via cloning willing subjects.

Over time the number of subjects went dow... read more

Cloning.