My wife kicked me out of the house because of my terrible Arnold Schwarzenegger impersonations..But, don’t worry. I’ll Return!!
Where did the Terminator find extra toilet paper?
Aisle B, back.
Why didn't the terminator upgrade to windows 10?
I asked him and he said, "I still love vista, baby!"
I don't get excited about gifts the way other people do, and it drives my wife nuts. For Father's Day, my wife was determined to get a reaction out of me and so she ordered me a custom-designed tie. She knew that I had two great passions in life: movies and dad humor, so she hired a well-known graph...
After Arnold Schwarzenegger quit the acting world, he should have started a pest control service
He is an ex-Terminator, after all.
I asked the clerk where the Terminator action figures were
She said "Aisle B, back".
Terminator and his friends were going to a costume party.
They all decided that they'll go as composers.
Friend 1: I'll be Mozart
Friend 2: I'll be Beethoven
Terminator: I'LL BE BACH
Michael: What do you call a terminator that doesn't let you finish your sentence?
Michael: An interrupter.
At the age of 73, Arnold Schwarzenegger is amazing in the latest Terminator movie.
The only difference is the catch phrase, which has been changed to...."Aaaaarrhh my back."
I can do a really bad Terminator impression!
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Dyslexic Sex Terminator looking for roommate.
Live with me if you want to come.
Terminator decided to stop killing and take up an honest job.
Now he's an exterminator
I used to kill humans for a living. Now, I kill insects;
You could say that I like being an... EX-terminator.
A Terminator walks into a bar...
He notices a fly and swats it, killing it immediately.
The bartender goes "I thought you only killed people."
The Terminator replies, "Negative. I am an Ex-Terminator."
What do you call a German robot that came from the future?
My wife insisted on a threesome with that Terminator actor
I didn’t want to risk trouble so as soon as he turned up I said “I’ll be front”
The Terminator T-100 walks into a bar and says,
"Gimmie a screwdriver! I need to loosen up."
Arnold Schwarzenegger at the age of seventy one is to star in a new Terminator film later this year,
They have changed his catchphrase slightly though, to...
"Ah, me back."
What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say to the movie execs when he found out they wanted more racial diversity in the Terminator movies?
I’ll be black.
The Terminator got sick of chasing Sarah Connor, so he started a pest control company.
He became an exterminator.
I'm going to an Italian restaurant with The Terminator...
I can't decide between pasta or pizza, baby.
My friend asked if I wanted to be the Terminator or a 17th century composer for halloween
So I said "I'll be Bach"
My wife said she is leaving me because I always mis-quote the Terminator films.
She'll be back.
What Did The Muslim Terminator Say?
Allah Be Back.
What did the Terminator chicken say when it crossed the road?
I'll be bawk.
what did the terminator say after deciding to learn classical music?
"I'll be bach"
What are terminators called when they retire?
Terminator, RoboCop, & Optimus Prime are all together thinking of their next costume for Halloween...
when RoboCop says "We should all be classical musical composers; I'll be..Beethoven!".
Optimus Prime agrees and says "alright - I'll be..Mozart!".
Terminator stands up and says "I'll be Bach!".
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A man visits his doctor for an exam.
"Well, Mr.Brown." Says the doctor. "I have just discovered that you have one testicle made of wood and another made of steel."
"But that's impossible." Says Mr.Brown. "I've never had any operations and apart from that I have perfectly healthy children."
"How old are your children?" ...
Terminator walks into a police station
He opens the first office and two police officers stand there mouths open. They reach for their pistols, but the Terminator opens his mouth and out shoots the sound of ear piercing violins. The police officers drop their pistols and clench their hands against their ears, but it's too much, their hea...
What do you call Aronold Schwarzenegger when he retires?
What did the terminator say when he accidentally got sent back in time to the renaissance?
I'll be Bach.
How does the Terminator lose weight?
By counting Kylereese.
What is an Italian Terminators Catchphrase?
Pasta la vista, baby.
I was talking with my good friend Arnold about what he was going to be for Halloween this year. It surprised me to hear that he intended to dress up as a composer. When i asked him which one he looked dead into my eyes and said "I'll be Bach."
Terminator doesn't google himself
he uses Altavista baby.
Which movie villain works at the abortion clinic?