A Bridge Too Far

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. Suddenly, the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.

The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime ...

Everybody Knows Somebody Called DAVE.

Dave is an advertising executive in L.A., who is always boasting that he knows EVERYONE on the planet, & they all know him.

His colleagues love hearing his stories about this celebrity, or that politician. However, his boss doesn't believe a word & challenges him to prove his boasts....

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A man walks into a bar

and seats himself at the bar and spots a big jug full of money behind the bar on the shelf with a note on it " Ask the bartender"

So the guy ask the bartender " What's with the jug full of money?"

Bartender says" well it's a series of challenges. First you have to do 10 shots of this...

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A judge challenges the local doctor to tell him whether there people are mad or not.

The three people enter the doctor's chamber and take their seats.

The flustered doctor decides to ask them the same question.

Doctor:- 1 bag has 3 balls. How many balls are there in 3 bags?

Man 1:- Is the ball black? Is the bag red? Is the bag tied with a string? When we imagine...

My friend used to run a hotel, but now he runs an Airbnb. I asked him if this change in job gave him any new challenges.

He said no, it’s entirely inn keeping.

A man walks into a bar

he notices a jar of cash on the counter, and asks the bartender, ”what’s with the jar” the bartender explains it is the prize for completing a set of challenges, entry is $5. The man orders a few drinks, all the while he contemplates attempting the challenges. After his 5th glass he sets down $5 dol...

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Kinda long, but I couldn't get the flair to work.

An explorer gets lost in the Amazon rainforest. While searching for a way out, he stumbles upon a tribe of cannibals. They all want to eat the man, but the chief pities the man. He says to the explorer:

"Look. I know you're lost, so I'm gonna give you a chance to save your life." And with tha...

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A guy walks into a bar

climbs onto a stool and screams, "ASSHOLES! ALL LAWYERS ARE ASSHOLES!"

"HEY!" someone yells out. "You watch your mouth!"

"Why?" the guy challenges. "Are you a lawyer?"

"No, I'm an asshole!"

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A man walks into a bar, and sees a huge jar sitting on the counter.

The jar is stuffed with $10 bills. There has to be at least twenty grand in there. Curious, he approaches the bartender.

He asks, "What's the deal with the jar?"

The bartender replies, "You put ten bucks in, and if you complete three challenges, you win the entire jar."

"What ar...

I tried one of those "Try Not To Laugh" challenges, but barely made it halfway before cracking up.

I guess you could say... I fought the LOL, and the LOL won.

Two cowboys were in an old west bar getting drunk

There’s a spittoon that everyone has been using throughout the night to spit their chewing tobacco into. One cowboy challenges the other one to swallow a mouthful from the spittoon for $100.

The other cowboy agrees and tilts the spittoon to his lips. He takes a big gulp as everyone starts t...

Tom is applying for a job as a signalman for the local railroad and is told to meet the inspector at the signal box.

The inspector decides to give Tom a pop quiz, asking: "What would you do if you realized that two trains were heading towards each other on the same track?"Tom says: "I would switch one train to another track.""What if the lever broke?" asks the inspector."Then I'd run down to the tracks and use the...

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Oh.. those Marines!

*A Marine walks into a bar and notices a Jar on the counter top with money in it.*

**Marine**: "This is new, what's it for?"

**Bartender**: "Its for our weekly challenge"

**Marine**: "Oh I love challenges, what is it for this week?"

**Bartender**: "Oh this one is a specia...

God challenges the Devil to a game of baseball.

“How can I lose?” God said. “I have all the best players up here!”

“How can I lose?” Said the Devil. “I have all of the umpires down here.”

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This is a joke from Norway that I've heard, as a Finn I absolutely love it.

A long time ago, there was a man named Toivonen, he had turned 18 and had to face a test about his manhood.

He got 3 challenges:
1. He must drink a bottle of hard booze in one sitting without cringing, flinching, or without a reaction in any way
2. He must shake hands with a live b...

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I wrote this one a few years ago

A priest, Father John Mclanahan is walking down the street when he bumps into an old friend, Rabbi John Goldman. They haven’t seen each other since college. They happen to be heading to the same part of town, so they decide to walk together and catch up on old times. They reminisce about their frien...

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The Three Challenges

**TL;DR:** Jokes don't have TL;DRs.

A man named Andrew walks into a bar, makes his way to the stool and asks the bartender for some Whiskey, on the rocks.

As the bartender serves Andrew his order, his eyes fall on a relatively large jar of money filled with $100 bills. He gets curious...

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"I'm the strongest man alive"

said the drunk man to the bartender.

"Oh really? Well we actually have our own local strongman competition, if you're interested. Keep in mind, it's a bit obscure. You up for it?"

"Psh. I can do anything," he slurs.

"Okay. Your first test is behind that door. You need to hogtie...

An English cat named ABC challenges a French cat named 123 to a swim across the English Channel, from the UK to France. They both swim hard, but only the English cat makes it. What happened to the other cat?

Well, un deux trois quatre cinq.

A russian village has a tradition...

...where each year they they hold a very unusal contest, that consists of 4 challenges: First, the contestants must down a bottle of vodka, then they must swim across an icy lake, third they must shake hands with a chained up wild bear on the other side, and finally they have to run to the closest v...

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Satan challenges God to a basketball game, so God puts together a choice team from heaven and goes down to hell.

When they come back to heaven, it's with shocking news: they lost the game 52 to 140!

The Virgin Mary is stunned, "How could you possibly lose the game with a team like yours?! Didn't you have the best saints, the most generous souls, the philanthropists and Jesus himself??"

"Yes," fum...

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The moonshine, the pitbull & the old lady.

John walks into a bar. As he orders a beer he sees a jar filled with 100$ bills on the counter. The bartender tells him that in order to win the jar of money, he has to complete 3 challenges, but the entry fee is 100$.

After some thinking, he decides to enter the contest. The bartender t...

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So i saw some people translating jokes so here is a Turkish one. One day a Japanese man walks into a bar in Turkey...

One day a Japanese man walks into a bar in Turkey and challenges everyone in the bar for a fight.

\-Are there anyone who believes he can defeat me ?

Temel gets up and walks to the door saying:

\-I can do it. Let's see what you are made of.

A few minutes later Temel walks ...

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Post in front of a bar. Complete 3 challenges win 10000$

A man sees the post and goes in to ask the bartender about it. The challenges are simple.

1. Drink two bottles of vodka.

2. Behind the door there's a crocodile with a loose tooth. Take out the tooth.

3. There's a stubborn girl in a room upstairs. Give her an orgasm.

He...

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A man is passing through a small town when he decides to visit the local bar.

He walks up to the counter where he notices a large jar filled to the brim with $5 bills. Curious, the man asks the bartender about the jar. The bartender tells him “here in our lil town of ours we ain’t got much goin’ on. So we decided to host a series of challenges here. Anyone can take on the cha...

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A Texas Man Moves To Alaska

So a Texas man moves to Alaska to find more oil for his company to drill. Here gets bored one night and goes to a local bar. The man sees "Impossible Challenge: Free beer for life for the winner!", out of curiosity he asks the bartender about it. "Hey bartender, what's the challenge?" The man asked....

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