What do you call an Irish guy who sells lawn chairs?

Patty O'Furniture

What do you call musical chairs with toilets?

Game of Thrones

Why are wooden chairs good for back pain?

They have lumber support!

(I'm sorry for this my brother came up with it)

What does a chair say to another?

Nothing, because chairs don't speak.


(When I created this joke I laughed at it for a week)

Two Irish priests decided to go on a vacation to Barcelona.

They were determined to make this a real vacation
by not wearing anything that would identify them as clergy.

As soon as the plane landed they headed for a store
and bought some really outrageous shorts, shirts, sandals, sunglasses, etc.

The next morning they went to the beach...

A backpacker finds a tiny village tucked away in the mountains with one tiny pub

He walks into the pub and there are all these old men just sitting around in silence. So the backpacker orders a beer and finds himself a seat.

Suddenly one of the men shouts, "Number 4!" and the whole room erupts with laughter.

The backpacker is surprised by this but then the laughter...

The doctor said to me, we need to talk about your weight.

I said, well it was about 25minutes but the chairs are quite comfortable.

Morecambe and Wise non-joke (they never got to the punchline)

There were two old men sat in deck chairs. One says: "It's nice out". The other says "Yes, I think I'll get mine out too."

How do you make a bandstand?

Take away their chairs.

A poor family starts saving up for spoons so they can invite their rich neighbor for supper... (Long)

Once they save up, they invite the rich man, and in the midst of their conversation, it is mentioned that they had to save up for a spoon. The rich man laughs and says,

"I have a spoon for every meal." The husband goes quiet at this, but the wife replies,

"We have a friend who uses a ...

3,000 male cows are playing musical chairs. What happens when the music stops?

A whole lot of bulls sit.

If the 2nd Amendment were a religion, what kind of chairs would their churches have?

Pew pews.

Dear receptionists.....

.. Please stop telling me to take a seat. I already have 25 chairs in my house from different offices.

I met an Irishman who told me he sold outdoor tables and chairs for a living

His name was Paddy O’Furniture

If anyone is alone this Christmas and has nobody to spend it with, please let me know..

I really need to borrow some chairs

Have you heard of the Irish guy who fixes garden chairs?

His name is Paddy O'Furniture

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.