UPJOKE
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Halloween candy

Halloween was over. All the trick or treaters came and went. Some got candies. Some got confused when we said "trick" and sprayed them with water.

A couple of hours later while we were taking the candy bag inside, a 12 year old came dressed in all red.

Naturally, I told him that Hall...

I stabbed a vampire, beat zombies to death and killed devil itself...

my wife rushes through the room and shouts, "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GIVE THEM CANDIES, FRANK"

What do Lifesaver candies do that men cannot?

Come in 5 different flavors.

Ben has 911 candies. He eats 420. What does he have now?

Diabetes.
Ben has diabetes.

Today a trick or treater came to my door looking for halloween candies.

I gave him a chocolate bar and on his way out he shouted "your wife is pretty". Needless to say the wife got excited and said cute what was he dressed up as. My response was easy "He was dressed up as a blind kid apparently"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A kindergarten teacher is teaching her students about the five senses.

Today, she's demonstrating to the class the sense of taste. To do so, she unwraps a bunch of candies and has the students guess what flavor they are. The students are doing great at first. They correctly guess the flavor of every candy, until they get to a honey-flavored one. For several minutes, th...

I miss going to the store with 1$ as a kid and being able to get a pack of milk, 12 eggs and a lot of candies.

Now they have cameras everywhere

Little boy keeping the shop...

A little boy was keeping his dad's shop while he was away.
There were lots of candies kept in jars for sell. They were known to be so delicious that kids couldn’t resist themselves from buying candies.
One day a passer by asked him, if he was keeping the shop, to which the boy said yes. Seei...

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