UPJOKE
moneygraftextortionkickbackcorruptionblackmaillobbyingembezzlementfelonyfraudmalfeasancescandalevasionallegationslaundering

A Native American shaman had an apprentice

One day the apprentice said to his mentor, "You take long trip. I try be shaman for summer."

The shaman asked, "Why should I take trip?"

The apprentice tried bribery. "If you take trip, I feed you belly full."

The shaman agreed, so the apprentice gave his mentor a big meal, and ...

Why is bribery illegal in election?

Because you actually get what you were promised.

Bribery is never the answer...

At least, that is what they paid me to say

With the bribery and corruption scandal surrounding the World Cup, I want to remind everyone that money can't change someone's mind.

But I'm willing to try.

If a politician says bribery is beneath them....

That means the envelope with money should be delivered under the table.

I once petted an airport security dog hoping he'll let me sneak in some weed

Got arrested for possession and bribery.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This whole college bribery scandal pisses me off. When I got into MIT, we didn't have fixers or bribes.

We did it the old fashioned way: cheating and blowjobs.

Never in my life have I seen so much corruption, bribery, bIackmail, jealousy, theft, fraud, deception, and outright bloodshed.

And honestly I'm wondering why I even play Monopoly with my family in the first place.

Why were you arrested?

- Why were you arrested?
- Bribery
- How come you were released so soon?
- What would you guess...

A prison mystery

\- Why were you sent to prison?

\- Bribery.

\- And how did you get out after just a month?

\- What do you think?

Trolley conductor

There is a town, in this town there is a massive trolley business. They have the best trolleys and they make the most money. They make their money by not paying people very much, people like George.

George was a trolley conductor for many years and he lived paycheck to paycheck. Part of his j...

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