With all the sexual impropriety charges happening recently...
I have my hand sign a consent form before I masturbate.
The pope dies and gets met by Jesus at the gates of heaven.
As they step inside, a ferarri pulls up and a man in red robes steps out with a beautiful blonde on his arm.
Shocked at such impropriety from a Cardinal, the pope asks Jesus what is going on.
"Oh," says Jesus, "he was a pious, celibate man his whole life, so dad gave him the opportuni...
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