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Baguettes Jokes

I went to the zoo today and there were 2 baguettes in a cage

The sign said they were bread in captivity.

Javert's Market is having a sale on baguettes.

Naturally, they're two for €6.01.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ever put baguettes up your butthole?

Le pain in the ass

I asked an MRA what he thinks about baguettes.

He said

"What about them? Bags have it way worse".

I was trying to eat a stale baguette

Safe to say, it was a pain

A baker bakes 73,247 baguettes in a year and sells each for $2.73. What does he make?

Bread.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Baguette Joke

A man that works for a large insurance company was sent to see the company's therapist. The therapist asked the man why he was sent to see her.
"I am told I have a speech impediment, but I think the really reason I was sent down here is because I hate baguettes," said the man in a crisp and flui...

I have the head of a watermelon, the arms of two French baguettes, the chest of two pillows. What am I?

Banned from the supermarket.

I once asked an affluent French baker how he'd managed to make so much money making bread. His answer:

Success baguettes success.

My friend has a weird talent:

He stands on a loaf of bread and when he throws a dart, he can hit the bullseye every time. He did it at a local talent competition once, and the judges were so impressed, they moved him up to an official talent league.

For the competition, however, he stepped it up. He stacked three baguette...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Typical, I go to buy sexy underwear for a ghost.

And all they have is baguettes.

Some people were swordfighting with long pieces of bread. Then, pretty soon, everyone was swordfighting with long pieces of bread

because violence baguettes violence.

My husband and daughter start using French bread as swords

I say, “You shouldn’t do that! Violence baguettes violence.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So there's this duck...

...and one day he's walkin down the street when he gets a huge craving for some donuts. So he goes to the bakery and walks in and says to the baker "hey man can i get a dozen donuts, half glazed and half boston creme?" And the baker's like "No, you can't. We don't serve ducks here." And the duck's a...

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