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Before the invention of crowbars…

Crows had to drink at home.

Before the crowbar was invented

Crows just drank at home

Did you know

Before the crowbar crows actually used to drink at home

A Robin walks into a crowbar.

Like 30 or 40 times

-The Joker

Where do crows go to get drunk?

Crowbars

10 crows walk into a bar

A passerby see's they entering and says "Look a crowbar"

A huge guy walks into a bar, approaches a little guy and karate chops him in the back. When the little guy gets up, the huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from Korea."

"A little later, the huge guy walks back over to the little guy and karate chops him in the back. The huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from China."

The little guy leaves the bar, comes back and hits the huge guy on the back. The huge guy lies unconscious on the floor. The little guy te...

I was wakened at 3am by a crashing noise...

I went down the stairs, cricket bat in hand, only to come face to face with an intruder stepping through my front door. He was armed with a crowbar but a swift crack of the willow round his head dropped him and he was spark out for enough time for me to grab a short length of rope. After hog-tying h...

My girlfriend wanted a favor from me

Her: I want you to kill my ex and make it seem like an accident

Me: Say no more

LATER

Detective: It looks like the killer used a crowbar to beat him to death and then placed a banana peel by his feet

A man finds a genie

The genie says " I will grant you three wishes, but whatever you receive, your ex wife will get twice as much"
"That's alright" says the man. "I want 10 Million Dollars" the man says. "Ok, now your ex wife has 20 million". "I want a mansion." "Ok now your ex wife has two mansions."
"What will...

My last 15 minutes as a 23 y/o!!

It's not my birthday but a scary looking man with a crowbar just broke into my house

How do you separate the men from the boys in Greece?

With a crowbar.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A blonde is driving down the highway

She is applying make-up in her rear view mirror. Her car drifts into the next lane and trades paint with a pickup truck. They pull off to the side of the road, the driver of the pickup truck gets out and he’s fuming. He asks the blonde if she has insurance and she just stares at him blankly... So he...

What do you call a pub that’s famous for its murders?

A crowbar.

A stranger gave me a really old metal box...

He said it was supposed to contain gold coins, but the lock and the hinges were so rusty which made it very hard to open. I tried a hammer and a crowbar, but the box just won't budge.

So, I'm thinking of trying to open this box with a stick of dynamite, as a last resort. I'll update you guys ...

What is the polish word for key?

Crowbar!

A girlfriend wants her boyfriend dead

But she doesn’t know how to commit a murder. She calls one of her best friends and tells her “I want him dead, but I’m to scared to do it. Could you help?”
Her best friend tells her “It’s alright, I got this and I’ll make it look like an accident.”

The next day the police are called beca...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There was this little guy sitting in a bar

There was this little guy sitting in a bar, drinking his beer, minding his own business when all of a sudden this great big dude comes in and -- WHACK!! -- knocks him off the bar stool and onto the floor. The big dude says, "That was a karate chop from Korea."
The little guy thinks "GEEZ,"...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar...

...and walks up to the bartender.

"Point out the toughest assholes in the place. I'm going to kick their asses."

The bartender looks around and notices a table in the back with four military guys sitting around it. A Marine, an Army soldier, an Air Force soldier, and a Navy sailor....

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A man is sitting at a bar when an Asian man walks in and sits next to him

Five minutes later the Asian man kicks the first man off his barstool

The first man looks at him and asks him why he did I that and the Asian man replies that's karate from Korea

Not wanting any trouble the man gets up and sits back down

Five minutes later the Asian man kicks th...

I don't mean to pry...

but do you have a crowbar I can borrow?

Never hit a man with glasses

A stick or crowbar will do much more damage

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

East meets West

A guy pulls up to a bar and walks in to get a drink. Almost immediately, he is accosted by another guy who has obviously had one-to-many.
The drunk demonstrates a clumsy karate chop and says, "That was karate from China." The new arrival just nods noncommittally and attempts to sit at the bar. Un...

Yesterday I got 3 IPhone Xs, two MacBooks and a pair of earpods all for $5

I got a great deal on that crowbar.

A man walks into a bar to find its full of black feathers.

Its a crowbar.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So there's a little guy sitting at a bar....(heard this years ago, hope it isn't a repost)

...when a much larger, muscular guy walks in who seems to have a chip on his shoulder. The big guy sits down next to the little guy and orders a beer, after a bit the big guy jumps up and completely out of nowhere punches the little guy, knocking him to the floor. "That's boxing, from Las Vegas." ...

78!

A man is sitting at a bus stop waiting for his bus to go to work. There are no cars on the road, just a young boy in the middle of the street jumping on top of a manhole cover shouting, "78! 78! 78!"

The man notices the boy and asks him, "What are you doing in the middle of the street?"
...

Two nails

A mathematician is tasked with removing two nails from a wall. One of the nails has been hammered all the way into the wall, the other only halfway. The mathematician thinks the nail that's completely embedded looks like a more interesting challenge and starts working on that one. Using tongs, a cro...

Did you hear about the birds who wanted to go out drinking?

They ended up at the crowbar.

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