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Agencies Jokes

The three most well-known spy agencies are the CIA, KGB, and MI5.

The rest are good.

CIA, Mossad and MI6 are the most famous spy agencies in the world

Other spy agencies are more professional.

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Why do ad agencies use Meiosis?

Because sex cells!













I thought of this during biology earlier lol

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A contest is announced for all the police agencies in the world

A contest is announced for all the police agencies in the world and after all the qualifying rounds were completed three police agencies were shortlisted for the finals, the Royal Canadian Mounted Police, France National Police and NYPD.

Just so it happened that a tiger was terrorizing a near...

Ad agencies love the Cosmic Banana

They all say its got universal appeal.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Adoption agencies are sexist. Women adopt babies all the time and no one cares...

But a 40 year old man asks to adopt a 16 year old and suddenly you need to leave the premises immediately.

The MI5, the CIA and the KGB are having a competition

Three small parties of all three Agencies meet on neutral ground, on the edge of a big german forest.

For the goal of the competition, they decided that each of their parties should catch a rabbit, using their espionage skills. The party that manages to catch the rabbit the quickest, wins....

Ever wonder why African dating agencies are so successful?

The clients always click

The President of America wants to test three agencies...

So he releases a rabbit into a forest and puts the FBI, CIA, and LAPD to the job of tracking down and returning the rabbit.

The FBI go in first, and after questioning all sources conclude that rabbits don't exist and if they did they came from out of space, the test is a hoax.

The CIA ...

I wrote a college paper about government agencies slowly encroaching on internet privacy.

It's called "NSA: An Essay."

Politicians, ISPs, Big Business, and foreign government agencies are all fighting for control over the internet, but who holds power over them all?

Anyone sorting by new.

French Intelligence agencies are pleased to announce today that they have developed very sophisticated Yves-dropping techniques.

Unfortunately, Yves did not survive the fall.

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Two intelligence agencies and a law enforcement organisation enter a competition.

They are supposed to be tested who can capture a fugitive in the best way possible.
The first is the CIA. The organizers of the competition let a rabbit loose in a forest. The CIA enters and after 2 hours of complete silence they exit the forest with the rabbit in their hands.
Second enters t...

Service?

I became confused when I heard the word"Service" used with these agencies:
Internal Revenue 'Service'
Postal 'Service'
Telephone 'Service'
Cable TV 'Service'
Civil 'Service'
State, City, County & Public 'Service'
Customer 'Service'
This is not what I thoug...

What do you call a potato that becomes US President and silences the news, silences government agencies, silences government funded science and ends international treaties?

A dic-tater.

I tried to write an article about a recent bedding scandal.

But all the other news agencies had it covered.

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Various law enforcement agencies have a fugitive tracking competition. A forest is divided by high fences into 100-acre sections, a squirrel is released into each one, and the game begins.

The CIA fill their section with animal agents all wearing wires. After three months with no leads, they announce that the squirrel never really existed.

The FBI works for a month and gets no leads. They burn down the forest, positively ID the squirrel remains, and announce at a press conferen...

A CIA Agent, KGB spy and AISE operative were sent to infiltrate a terrorist cell.

The terrorists figured out the three were infiltrators and thus captured them.

The terrorists decided to torture the three infiltrators. They started with the CIA agent.

“Do not worry, for I have been trained in the United State’s most insidious enhanced interrogation techniques and h...

I installed a new home alarm system I've never felt safer

I've disconnected my home alarm system and de-registered from the Neighborhood Watch.


I've got two Pakistani flags raised in the front yard, one at each corner, and the black flag of ISIS in the center.


The local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service...

[Long] The American Fox Hunt

The US president, wanting to see which of his intelligence agencies was the best, released a fox into a wood and asked various agencies to catch it.

The NSA goes first. They tap the phone lines within the rabbit holes and monitor any internet searches on fox related topics within the wood. Af...

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My ex girlfriend got a butt implant...

Shortly after the operation, she starting getting calls from all these modeling agencies and she was even featured in the new Drake music video that aired on MTV.


I called her to say congratulations, and she asked me how I found out...


I just s...

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A criminal gets arrested. NSFW

After the arrest he is put into his usual cell. After entering the cell he greets everyone as he is familiar with all of them. After the greetings, he notices an unfamiliar guy sitting alone in the corner that he has never seen before.
"First time?" He asks. The stranger nods in agreement. "What ...

The Law Enforcement Test

The President wants to know which of the enforcement agencies is the best at convicting criminals so he sets a test for the CIA, FBI and LAPD. He releases a rabbit into the forest and asks them to apprehend it.

The CIA go in first, using drones to scan the trees, paying the other animals for ...

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