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Anyone know of a cure for sex addiction?

I’ve tried fucking everything

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I have a masturbation addiction

But I'm beating it

I have an addiction to brake fluid.

The good news is I can stop anytime I want.

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In an attempt to break his addiction...

In an attempt to break his addiction, a chronic masturbator decides to buy a whiteboard and start tallying the days since he last jerked off. After a successful day, the man grabs a marker and draws two tallies, but realizing it had only been one day, he takes his hand and rubs one out.

I've had a severe addiction to taking inventory at the blacksmithing shop.

We all have our vices.

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My family is getting very concerned about my Grandfather's Viagra addiction.

My grandma Is taking it particularly hard.

I don't have a cocaine addiction.

I just like the way it smells.

What do you call the prophet with a cocaine addiction?

Nostril-Damus

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Its good that the Japanese chef is recovering from his alcohol addiction

He's 2 years soba already.

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i asked my therapist: can you cure my bondage addiction?

he said: "i wish i can help you but my hands are tied"

My wife is fed up with my constant stream jokes, so I asked her, "How can I stop my addiction?!" She shot back, "Whatever means necessary!!"

I chuckled, "No it doesn't!"

My addiction to Helium is out of control, but...

no one is taking my cries for help seriously.

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Yesterday I learnt that I have a real problem with heroine addiction.

I have to have sex with a woman admired for her courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities...

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Who do you call for questions about sex addiction?

Nympho-mation

Chicken Addiction

A guy really wanted to eat chicken. He was craving it for a while and he decided to go get some. But, he didn't want any of the fast food type chicken. So, he decided to cook it himself.

He goes to the butcher to buy it. The butcher gave him a live chicken. The man, surprised, asked the butch...

I have an addiction to making references to random Bruce Willis movie titles. People have tried to help me stop but you know what they say. Old habits...

Pulp Fiction

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A bee landed on a girl's chest at the sex addiction therapy course.

Apparently screaming Boo Bee at her chest was wrong...

What do you call it when you fail to break your addiction to mid-day rests?

Re-naps

I'm on medication for my Pokemon Go addiction.

Gotacachemol.

I can only see Jane's Addiction videos on YouTube if I stare straight at them

I must've lost my PerryFerrell vision

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If I was addicted to masturbation, and then became addicted to sex...

Would it be safe to say that my addiction got ot of hand?

My wife and kids are threatening to walk out of the house because of my addiction to horse racing.

And they’re off!

My wife left me because of my poker addiction.

I for sure thought she was bluffing.

I'm absolutely heartbroken. My Girlfriend has broken up with me over my chronic gambling addiction..

.. Desperate to win Her back.

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There are days when I truly think I've gotten over my porn addiction

......then I remember my favourite Michael Jackson song is 'Beat It'

Gambling addiction hotlines would be so much better if...

Every fifth caller was a winner.

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The 3 ex drug addicts

So 3 ex drug addicts (let's call them Jim, Mike and Bill) volunteered for a week to try to convince as many junkies as possible to ask for help to fight their addiction. They were given by the local authorities 2 photos, one showing a small circle and one showing a big circle and they were told to u...

I have a oxygen addiction

I tried to stop yesterday, but after a minute I started feeling blue

How do you call an alcoholic that doesnt admit the addiction?

Jack Denials

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Yeah, I have a heroine addiction.

\*Pulls out young adult novel with a strong female figure\*

So there’s these three Catholic priests go fishing at the local lake for the day

While their there, they notice that the fish aren’t biting. They’re bored out of their minds until one of them says something about it.

The first priest mentions that “We always give confession amungst others, but we never have the opportunity to give it amungst ourselves.”

The other t...

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I beat my addiction

To porn, single handedly

I have a sausage addiction....

.....and it's getting Wurst.

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Porn addiction has cost me everything I hold dear in my life....

But I’m glad I got a handle on it.

My wife gave me an ultimatum today - it was her or my shameless addiction.

The decision was a piece of cake.

+how's your gambling addiction going?

\-i don't know but i bet is fine.

I just got over my addiction to chocolate, nuts and marshmallows.

I have to admit it was a rocky road.

My family is all worried about my addiction to dot to dot puzzles. It's OK though...

I know where to draw the line...

A guy with a gambling addiction walks into a butchers

He goes to the butcher - "I bet you $500 you can't get the meat down from the top shelf without a ladder"

The butcher says "I can't take that bet, the steaks are too high"

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Pete goes to a masturbation addiction meeting

The meeting had been going on for hours and he really had to pee.

He raised his hand and asked "May I use the restroom?"

The host said that it was alright, once Pete had turned around he heard a voice saying "Ya need a hand?"

I have an addiction to stealing traffic signs.

But I can STOP whenever I want to.

Can radio be an addiction?

Depends on the frequency.

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My masturbation addiction and lycanthropy are really messing up my sleep.

I'm up all night tossing and turning.

My wife just left me because of my gambling addiction...

I wonder what the odd are for me winning her back.

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Started seeing a sex addiction therapist last week

Wow she’s good in bed!

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What event does a weightlifter with a masturbation addiction and fast recharge rate do.

The clean and jerk.

A small man admitted himself to rehab with a gambling addiction

It’s ok. He’s a little better.

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My friend asked me if my masturbation addiction got any better

I replied: no, if anything it got harder

I’ve finally managed to conquer my addiction to swimming.

I’ve been dry for six months now.

Alcohol Addiction

My anxiety has been in overdrive since the start of the Pandemic. I feel like I need more and more alcohol everyday.

I am going through at least a liter of the hard stuff everyday.
I start using as soon as I wake up and don't stop until I go to bed each night.

My Dr. says I need t...

To overcome his drug addiction my son decided to become a woman.

Now's he's Coleen.

A Priest with a golf addiction...

awakes to a beautiful Sunday morning after weeks of bad weather. He just can't work today, he HAS to find a way to fit in a round or two of golf. He calls in sick, and drives 2 hours to distant course so no one will recognize him. He lines up his first shot, a par 5, and lets it rip...

Mea...

my friend told me that im probably going to have a gambling addiction

i told him:
"how much are you willing to bet on that"

My new girlfriend left me because of my addiction to horse racing ...

I knew it wouldn't last furlong

I’ve been battling my addiction to the ‘Hokey Cokey’ dance for a number of years now..

It’s been a long and hard challenge, but I’ve turned myself around and that’s what it’s all about.

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