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Warning Sign Jokes

The warning sign

There was a watermelon plantation which had been constantly spoiled by night thieves who were trespassing to steal melons. The owner came with an idea to repel the intruders: he put a warning sign on the plantation's fence: "Beware! Steal on your own risk! One melon below this fence is poisoned!"...

Disney shouldn't have to post warning signs

Don't their gators make a ticking sound as they approach?

Did you hear, Little Timmy wandered straight into the mine field?

The whole town heard.

Some say he was distracted, that his mind was all over the place.
It certainly is now.

Timmy wasn’t too smart.
The warning sign next to the minefield *literally* has more brain than him.

The mine field always filled Timmy with awe and wonder.
It ...

I purchased this closed box full of bees, it has a warning sign which says

Be Safe

warning sign on children's alphabet blocks

Letters may be used to construct words, phrases and sentences that may be deemed offensive.

Funeral homes really need spoiler warning signs on the front of their doors.

In case any baby attends.

Hiking though the woods with my wife

We were hiking through the woods for a few hours and ended up at the edge of a cliff.

The only way forward was to walk across an old bridge. I told my wife I'll go first and cautiously walked across.

My wife yelled, is the bridge stable? I yelled back, as stable as our marriage. Ignor...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Celebrating 50th wedding anniversary

A couple of grandparents, to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary, decide to return to the place where they met many years ago, a bar located in a very picturesque town. They wait for the weekend, get into their car, and head to the town.
Upon arrival, they ask a police officer for directio...

A man who is already drunk from a bar is about to enter another bar...

...while still drunk he struggles to find the entrance to the bar. He is only able to notice a big sign reading "NO SHIRT, NO SHOES, NO SERVICE." The shocking warning sign instantly makes him snap out of drunkenness and quickly look down to see his shoes and shirt have been lost from his last drunk ...

This joke works better told than read. There are 15 boxes in an airplane. One falls out. How many are left?

14.

*****

How do you put an elephant inside a refrigerator in 3 steps?

1. open the door
2. put the elephant in
3. close the door

*****

How do you put a giraffe inside a refrigerator in 4 steps?

1. open the door
2. remove the elep...

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