UPJOKE
ravenfolklorealliterationparodyplutointernal rhymeedgar allan poeodinsupernaturalmeterbustprophettheallegoryoctameter

The Raven Jokes

The raven was indecisive....

He said, "Probably not. But don't quote me on that."


*Sorry, that's was a Poe joke.*

Why did the flight attendant prevent the raven from boarding the plane?

He had too much carrion.

What's the difference between a crow and a raven?

A Raven has 17 feathers at the end of it's wing, these feathers help with flight and are known as pinion feathers. Where the Raven has 17 of them a Crow only has 16 of these feathers.

So the difference between a Crow and a Raven is a matter of a pinion.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Tale Of The Two Ravens

Once upon a time there was a raven sitting on a nice, solid branch of a big oak, allowing the bird to have a great view over the fields beneath him. The raven didn't do much, he was simply sitting on his ass. After some time another raven spotted the solid branch and the first raven and decided to s...

If the stork brings white babies and the raven brings black babies, what kind of bird brings no babies?

The swallow

What’s the bird that symbolizes…

What’s the bird that symbolizes peace?

The Dove.

What’s the bird that symbolizes death?

The Raven.

What’s the bird that symbolizes True Love?

The Swallow.

The Ravens could have beat the Bengals . . .

in an elevator.

The tiny door to the magic castle was barely big enough to crawl through. It was carved with a half-lion, half-eagle, and guarded by a fearsome raven that would only allow you to pass if you breathed on its foot...

So basically you had to huff n puff on the raven claw then slither in the griffon door.

Dave and Joe were best friends

Joe and his family went on vacation for about a week, but when he came back, Dave noticed that he was very different, his mood and tendencies had completely changed.

This was not the same Joe.

The smoking gun was that Joe's eyes were not his usual green, but blue.

He flew to J...

A prophet as a child (an oldly but a goody)

A child was a prophet, granted the ability to see the future

One night he went to sleep, and he had a dream where a raven came down to him and told him "tomorrow, your aunt will die"

The next day, the boy told his parents about the dream

They called his aunt to earn her, but a ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Rules of Corporate Management - Part 1

I have spent a lot of years working in corporations small, large and massive. I have climbed the corporate ladder and have gathered three rules that are invariable true. Follow these rules and you will survive. They come in the form of fables.

Rule 1
One day, a turkey is walking down th...

The difference between birds

A new study from a renowned bird journal found the difference between crows and ravens.

Apparently, aside from size, their wings are made differently. The common crow has six pinions per wing, while the raven has only five.

The conclusion: It is only a difference of a pinion.

Three men walk into a party.

The first man beelines toward a table with a bowl of punch. The second man closely follows. A few people are ahead of them so while they wait the first man turns to the second man and asks:

"Have you ever heard the one about the garden gnome?"

The second man replies "No, not that I can...

Touring Stephen King's writing studio

Stephen King is showing a group of students around his writing studio, chaperoned by their aging English teacher. The students are clearly amazed with the items he has on display.

King leans over the desk to pick up a jar to show the children.

“I’m often asked,’ he says with words thi...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.