UPJOKE
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Tenured Jokes

What do you call a tenured professor?

Retired.

I got a tenured professorship. My area of expertise is mosquito bites.

It’s one hell of a niche.

A tenured math professor handed out the blue books for an exam.

Considering he's given a variation of this test over the past 15 years, he didn't expect any surprises. As usual, all the students finished within the hour.

While grading the tests later that day, he came across an unusual response. As he opened the front cover, a $100 bill fell out to reveal...

How do you tell the difference between a terrorist and a tenured professor?

You can negotiate with a terrorist.

What do you call a cross between an academic and a dinosaur?

A philosoraptor.




Or... tenured.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Marine Biologist

My uncle is a marine biologist who grew up in Kansas. He moved to Los Angeles for grad school and never left. His first real job was as a lab tech at USC, where he spent several years before stumbling into a part-time instructor job, which he finally parlayed into a tenured faculty position. The wor...

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