What did the subatomic quantum pirate say to the theoretical physicist?

Walk the Planck

What noise does a subatomic duck make?

Quark

Which subatomic particles are into BDSM?

Top and bottom quarks

Did you hear about the reclusive subatomic particle?

It was a bit quarky.

I don't believe anything that subatomic particles tell me

They make up everything.

What do you call a watchful subatomic particle that resides far from a nucleus?

A surveillance electron.

Two guys decide that they'd go out drinking on the night before their exam.

Wasted on the night before, the two arrive at the university well after the exam ended. They went straight to the professor, saying that they couldn't take the test because one of the car's tires had gone flat. Surprisingly, the professor allows them and promptly tells them to come back tomorrow....

What do you call a subatomic ant eater?

An Ardquark.
(Or a Quarkvark ;)

I've been calibrating my new device which measures the electric charge of subatomic particles by testing it on Protons

So far, the results have been positive.

Did you hear the one about the subatomic particle that refused to pay the bus fare?

It just lepton.

I saw a doctor's office that does proton therapy.

I never thought that subatomic particles would need therapy, but I guess it's not easy being positive all the time.

Did you hear Charlize Theron has been cast in the next Ant-Man movie?

It's going to be called "Subatomic Blonde."

11 Geeky Jokes

1. What does a subatomic duck say “Quark”.

2. Why did I divide Sin by Tan, Just Cos.

3. Why programmers like UNIX:
unzip, strip, touch, finger, grep, mount, fsck, more, yes, fsck, fsck, fsck, umount, sleep

4. Why can’t you trust atoms, they make up everything.

5. A pen...

Ten Science Jokes for Nerds

* I’m reading a great book on anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.

* I have a new theory on inertia but it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum.

* Why can’t atheists solve exponential equations? Because they don’t believe in higher powers.

* Schrodinger’s cat walks into a bar. And ...

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