Sponsor Jokes - 62 Hilarious Sponsor Jokes

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If r/Jokes posts were like YouTube videos

Joke title: IS THIS THE WORLD'S FUNNIEST JOKE?

Hello welcome to my joke, this joke is sponsored by BackdooredVPN, get the VPN service for just $29.95 a month. Also sponsored by Microtransaction Legends, download the app for free today.

Before we share the joke we want to remind you tha...

My girlfriend and I were shopping today. We saw that Trojan had designed Olympic sponsored Condoms? I told here we had to buy some...

What's so special about them?

They have 3 colors: Gold, Silver and Bronze.

And what color are you going to wear tonight?

Gold, obviously!

Why not Silver? It'd be great if you could come second for a change.

My old school was sponsored by IKEA...

Assembly took ages.

The Olive Garden should sponsor The Fast and Furious franchise.

Because when you are there, you are Family.

I heard the Toronto Maple Leafs now have the milk board as their sponsor.

Now they only have to put in 2% of the effort.

This joke is not sponsored by the AUstralian open

**Q:** Can tennis players cook?

**A:** No, they can only serve and return.

New company sponsored exercise program

Now that we are all back at work from COVID, we have started a new exercise program. It includes such wonderful exercises as:
Running amok
Jumping to conclusions
Passing the buck
Point fingers
Climbing the walls
And my favorite exercise of all... diddly squats!

How does Marjorie Taylor Green vote on Democrat sponsored bills?

Neigh

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Sponsor tattoos

A pro marathon runner gets sponsor tattoos and can't wait to show his girlfriend. He says," Look honey, I have Nike on my arm and Starter on by back!" Later that night in bed, he pulls off his pants, the girlfriend sees "Aids" tattooed on his penis, screams and runs into the bathroom. The runner ye...

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What do pornstars get for sponsors.

Oral B.

I'll walk myself out.

This post is sponsored by Uncle Tom’s rice.

It’s like Uncle Ben’s, but a bit more racist

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My wife is doing a sponsored parachute jump tomorrow and I am genuinely terrified that the chute won't open.

Last time something that big hit the earth, the fucking dinosaurs got wiped out.

My AA sponsor said coke & hookers are not an appropriate Birthday gift..

So i took my business elsewhere!

Do you know who was the biggest sponsor of the movie Human Centipede?

Nokia.

Nokia - Connecting people

Sorry.

How does a Muslim influencer wish for sponsored posts?

Installah

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Nazi Germany sponsored a program for less fortunate kids to travel to the Far East.

it was called "youth in Asia".

What brand of medicine sponsored a boxer?

Muhammad Aleve

My AA sponsor told me to stay away from places where I used to drink

I just sold my car.

I've heard Dunkin Donuts is going to be the official sponsor of no nut November.

Their name will be Dunkin Nonuts for a month.

William Shatner is going to sponsor a new line of women's jeans made to hide adult diapers underneath.

They're going to be called Shatner Pants.

No one is sure how much it cost Coke to sponsor the Paralympics,

but it undoubtedly cost an arm and a leg.

My school has become an academy; it's sponsored by IKEA.

Lessons are ok, but morning assembly takes ages.

I organised a day of sponsored bungee jumping for the local disabled group...

Perhaps calling it 'spastic on elastic' wasn't one of my greatest ideas...

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I heard KFC is sponsoring the cock fighting little league.

Can’t wait to see those chick contenders.

A man has the opportunity to win a million dollars if he can cross lake Superior in a 16 foot sailboat...

The people sponsoring the challenge give the man two choices of what he can bring on the boat to assist him. He can either bring a large box of novels or two criminals. However, the people running the competition get to choose what the books are and who the criminals are.

The man realizes the...

When my mom asked me to sponsor her Run for The Cure, I was surprised.

I'd thought The Cure had done quite well for themselves.

The Washington Redskins' stadium being sponsored by FedEx makes a lot of sense.

Neither delivers on Sundays.

Did you hear about the new TV adaptation of Fiddler on the Roof, sponsored by Real Doll?

"Snatchmaker, Snatchmaker, make me a snatch."

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Hitler sponsors a 10k...

He calls it the "Master Race"

As compensation for their appalling behaviour, United Airlines are going to sponsor a lot more community sports and activities

Their first project will be Drag Racing

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Adolf Hitler banned 5k races but sponsored an annual marathon...

...Because Marathons are the master race.

There was a Political Drum-Off last week, sponsored by the mathletes...

Democrats and Republicans took turns showing off their best drum licks, while answering math problems in between.

Turns out the Republicans lost. They couldn't handle Al Gore rhythms.

I worry that if Nike sponsored a Suicide Prevention Day event...

...the words "Just Do It" would be everywhere.

I'm proud to say that I sponsor a kid in Africa. I feed clothe and educate him all for less than 30 cents a day!

That's peanuts when compared to what it cost to send him there

A woman got a job at a horseback riding academy

One day, she was appointed to give a tour to one of the schools' wealthiest donors.

The donor in question was an old man; his eyes were failing but despite that handicap he was impressed with the academy developments.

When they reached the stable to examine the horses, she took him fi...

Ever since I was a kid I wanted to be good enough at skating, biking, surfing, or running to be chosen to represent a brand like Nike, Red Bull, or Under Armour. Recently the pandemic has allowed me to double down on recreation and hone my craft, and I finally got a sponsor.

Thanks Alcoholics Anonymous!

Jack and Jill went up a hill to fetch a pail of water...

...however if you sponsor Jack and Jill for just $2 a month, we can build a well with clean water right in their village.

Given social distancing regulations, a ton of condiment companies are being forced to cancel July 4th campaigns like sponsored concerts, where they planned to hand out signature color sunglasses to attendees.

Bad idea, Heinz-Sight 2020.

How many YouTubers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Calm down, I’ll tell you. But first, a word from our sponsor, Raid: Shadow Legends!

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A toothpaste factory had a problem.

They sometimes shipped empty boxes
without the tube inside. This challenged their perceived quality with the
buyers and distributors. Understanding how important the relationship with
them was, the CEO of the company assembled his top people. They decided to
hire an external engineering ...

Apparently Tucker Carlson is starting a new band

Rage sponsored by the machine

I've just had some great news.

Financially I am going to be $3. per month better off.

The boy I was sponsoring in Africa has just been eaten by a Lion.

I wanted to make a joke criticising YouTube and how ridiculous it's gotten in there

But first, a word from our sponsor RAID: Shadow Legends!

Why did they cancel Kleptomaniacs Anonymous?

Because the sponsor at the most recent meeting asked if anybody wanted to take a seat.

Do we really need a new smartphone every year??

My financial situation is so bad....

...... I'm being sponsored by a child in Africa

1960s USSR. The peak of KGB paranoia.

Neighbors are ratting out neighbors. Employees report their coworkers to the KGB for innocuous jokes. Nighttime knocks on the door are commonplace. Regular citizens are labeled enemies of the people and taken away.

A group of university students are on a government-sponsored trip to a confere...

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Julia was organizing a cat show

Julia was organizing a cat show and needed a trophy for the first prize. So she contacted a sculptor to create a trophy that resembled a beautiful persian cat.

Julia and the sculptor got together to discuss the plans for this trophy. She wanted the base to be made of the finest white marble w...

Whats the difference between a presidential election and a nascar race?

In nascar they wear their sponsors on their shirts.

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If I had a dollar every time someone called me sexist...

I'd have enough money to sponsor the repealing of the 19th Amendment.

I'm so happy that my financial situation has finally improved.

I just found out the African boy I've been sponsoring has been eaten by a lion.

A YouTuber becomes a doctor...

This surgery is sponsored by Blue Apron!

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Bill Gates is having lunch in a restaurant when a young man comes over.

He says "Excuse me Mr Gates, I know this is presumptious but if I can have thirty seconds of your time: I read your amazing book about your early career and, basically, I'm now at the point you were at when you were just starting out. I'm entertaining a couple of business sponsors to lunch and it wo...

My kid was dying to go on our trip to Disneyland

What would happen if James Bond took Viagra?

He would continue to be a state-sponsored terrorist whose actions disgrace us all.

Madonna is talking with the Spice Girls

Says she wants to sponsor a reunion tour so long as she can join them. The girls agree to condition. They call her Old Spice.

"We're happy to announce NASA's newest mission will allow us to LITERALLY touch our own Sun!"

"Before we continue, please welcome our strangely-excited sponsors, the Catholic Church!"

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Jack was from a poor family with many siblings [OC]

As the eldest child, he took up the responsibility of helping his parents financially by doing odd jobs, be it collecting recyclable scraps, cleaning, babysitting, dog walking or simple repair work. He had no choice but to drop out of high school at the age of 14 to work full time in order for his o...

Trump's first day at the Oval Office after being elected President

First briefing by the CIA, Pentagon, FBI:

Trump: We must destroy ISIS immediately. No delays.

CIA: We cannot do that, sir. We created them along with Turkey, Saudi, Qatar and others.

Trump: The Democrats created them.

CIA: We created ISIS, sir. You need them or else you w...

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Guns – Good Question, Better Answer!

For those that don't know him, Major General Peter Cosgrove is an Australian General.
General Cosgrove was interviewed on the radio recently.
Read his reply to the lady who interviewed him concerning guns and children.
Regardless of how you feel about gun laws, you have to love this!
Thi...

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The kindness of the elderly . . .

When we get older, we think differently, don't we? This letter was sent to the Principal's office after the school had sponsored a luncheon for the elderly. An elderly lady received a new radio at the lunch as a door prize and was writing to say thank you. This story is a credit to all humankind . ...

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Marine Biologist

My uncle is a marine biologist who grew up in Kansas. He moved to Los Angeles for grad school and never left. His first real job was as a lab tech at USC, where he spent several years before stumbling into a part-time instructor job, which he finally parlayed into a tenured faculty position. The wor...

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