UPJOKE
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Hey, do you remember that 90's boy band which advocated for a way to save water while peeing?

It was called "in sink" or something like that.

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone,

but they’ve always worked for me.

Schrodinger’s cat was meant to prove how dumb quantum states are, yet it’s widely used to advocate and explain it. I bet he’s rolling in his grave...

and not

Why was Gandhi an advocate of naan violence?

Because Hindus don't like beef

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Bible actually advocates for pot and homosexuality

Leviticus:12 - "If a man lies down with another man, they both should be stoned."

A pro life advocate asked me how I’d feel if I was aborted

I wouldn’t.

I don’t think there’s anything worse than a devils advocate.

Or do I?

My old pastor was an outspoken advocate for Amazon.

I guess you could say he was a Prime minister.

What do dwarf and antivax advocates have in common?

\#ShortLivesMatter

Did you hear abute the organization that advocates for Canadians’ gun rights?

The “NR, eh?”

An old man, a schoolboy, a lawyer, a doctor, and a community service worker are all on a plane with only four parachutes when...

The pilot of the plane has a stroke and passes away. As the plane plummets its passengers to death the five members of the aircraft argue over who deserve to have the four bags containing the parachutes.

Social Worker: I deserve to live because I protect vulnerable children and support famili...

To play devil’s advocate on this whole Net Neutrality thing...

He’s sure looking forward to meeting Ajit Pai

An animal rights advocate got really upset with me after I told them that I wash my dog with my own shampoo instead of pet shampoo...

...I reassured her that it had already been tested on animals.

Worker- Can I get a raise? Boss- Because of the fluctuational predisposition of your position's productive capacity as juxtaposed to the industry standards, it would be monetarily injudicious to advocate an increment.

Worker- I don't get it !

Boss- That's right.

What do you call an American linguist, philosopher, cognitive scientist, logician, political commentator, social justice activist, and anarcho-syndicalist advocate who doesn't eat ham?

NO-HAM CHOMPSKY

If Satanists had missionaries...

would they be called Devil's Advocates?

Lawyer: Your honour, what if my client is guilty?

Cruella: WTF? You are supposed to defend me!

Lawyer: Relax. I’m playing de Vil’s advocate.

Business can be generated any how!

An advocate goes to a gift shop 7 days before Valentine's Day.


He bought 40 beautiful cards and wrote - "To my love !! I hope you recognize! Meet me in the evening, "I love you"
The shopkeeper asked: What is the matter?
So the lawyer said - I sent such cards to the nearby colo...

A man is being interviewed for a government position.

The interviewer asks him "Do you advocate the overthrow of the government, by violence or subversion?".

The candidate replies "I think I prefer subversion.".

Why did the atheist get in an argument with the priest?

He was playing devil's advocate

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Pope visits Alabama and sees two white guys pulling a black guy out of a river on a rope.

The pope orders the pope-mobile to stop and he gets out to praise the two guys for such an act of kindness and for breaking down racial boundaries in this modern society. He blesses the two men and says he will see them in heaven.
 

Cletus turns to Bobby Joe and asks *“who the fu...

Lawyers and Loopholes

To all my Advocate Friends
Two well dressed lawyers went to an expensive restaurant...

Ordered 2 drinks
and then got sandwiches from their briefcases and began to eat them...
Waitress: Sorry Sir !!! But you can't eat your OWN food here... Its against the rules ...

The lawyer...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Young liberal vs. Japanese industrial automation expert

Junji Tsuda, a futurologist, expert as well as advocate for industrial automation, is having an interview on live American TV. The host announced that Mr. Junji Tsuda will be accepting questions from the audience.

After several questions, a member of the audience stood up and started asking:<...

Several years ago, a group of artistic polymaths decided to mathematically represent different styles of painting.

Several years ago, a group of artistic polymaths decided to mathematically represent different styles of painting.

Each of the polymaths was a leading figure in a different field of mathematics, and each pursued and studied a different style of painting. Together, they decided that if they co...

What's the difference between Karl Marx and Donald Trump?

Trump only advocates the seizing of a *woman's* means of production

A scientist and the Catholic Pope were eating lunch together while discussing the latest news in scientific discovery.

Scientist: Right now, my research team is working on trying to clone insects using gene-replicating techniques.

Pope: That is very interesting! How far have you come along with it?

Scientist: We have engineered the cloning process, now we are going to execute our next phase which is ex...

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